Chapter 2
Jacqueline-France
"You American men! You just don't know what joys anal intercourse can bring. Not only for yourselves, but for your women, too. I have met Americans here in Paris and, with the exception of a select few, they all seem scared to death of anal intercourse. They look at me as if I'm crazy when I suggest it! Personally, I see no reason why we should not enjoy the pleasures of anal sex. We enjoy regular intercourse and oralism, n'est ce pas?
"I am a bookseller here on the Left Bank. It is a good living. I enjoy meeting people, talking to them, sharing their thoughts and interests. And I adore the tourists-they love my Paris, they love me, and I love them. I love their bodies, also. You see, sex is a big part of my life. And I want it to be so.
"I had my first sexual experience ten years ago at the age of thirteen, when we visited our family in the Loire Valley. My favorite cousin Jacques was fifteen at the time and we went for a walk in their enormous vineyard. Soon, we found ourselves sitting near a little stream in the sunlight. Jacques took off his shirt and lay back in the grass and started telling me of his recent sexual adventures. He knew quite a lot for his age and he certainly had a well-developed body. I watched him, fascinated as a big lump began to grow in his pants.
"Go ahead, Jacqueline, take it out. It won't bite you," he said with a smile, leaning up on his elbows. I think I must have blushed quite a bit, because I had never touched a man's penis, although I had seen them and talked about them with my girl friends. I also thought of what it would be like to feel one in my hand-thoughts which became my best masturbation fantasy. Now my cousin was inviting me to make my fantasy come true.
"I fumbled with the buttons on his pants, as he didn't help me. He just watched, amused. Finally I got them open. Reaching in, I wrapped my fingers around his organ-it was monstrous. Jacques just laughed and opened his buckle, sliding his pants down to his ankles. I stared at the huge thing between his legs. I'll never forget the sight of it there in the sunlight-it was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen."
"Then Jacques spread his legs and told me to play with him, to touch him, to do anything I wanted. I was shaking because I was so excited. I thought, If only mother and father knew! I knelt between his outstretched legs and stroked his penis with my fingertips. Touching his balls lightly, I watched them move around in their sac.
"Go ahead, it won't bite!" Jacques said again, spreading his legs a little more. Now I could see the hair between his buttocks and the opening to his asshole. Even then, in my first experimenting with sex, I was fascinated by the anus. Jacques lifted his legs and spread his cheeks, because he could see I was very interested in his ass. I touched there, at the opening and I heard him moan, and then he told me to put a finger in him.
"I was shocked. Put a finger up his ass? I didn't know how. What finger? How deep? Wouldn't it hurt? But he guided me, applying saliva to my finger. He pressed it directly to the opening of his asshole and told me to force it in. I pushed and it was tight, but the muscle soon gave way and my finger slid up my cousin's derriere. The whole realization of what I was doing was overwhelming and I felt a tingling and a wetness between my legs. I watched Jacques as he moaned and wriggled on the grass in obvious delight as I moved my finger just a little, deep in his asshole. His penis seemed to grow even larger and he began to rub the skin up and down in his hand. The tip looked as if it were, going to explode. He loved what I was doing and then he told me to grab his cock and finger his ass at the same time. I did, pumping up and down his long organ with my right hand, while my left was under his asshole, with my finger buried to the hilt.
"A few moments later, Jacques thrust his hips in the air and I saw his balls tighten. Then a blast of white cream shot from the tip of his penis and the muscles of his asshole seemed to lock around my finger. He shouted and I felt all strength go out of his body as he was wracked with spasms. A hot liquid covered his chest and belly, and poured down over my hands. I loved the feel of it and wondered what it tasted like, but I was too embarrassed to actually lick some of it.
"But Jacques helped me. He sat up just as I pulled my finger from his hot asshole, and I lifted my other hand from his cock and saw that it was covered with white cream. I looked up into his eyes and he grabbed my hand. I was about to wipe it on the grass, and I didn't know why he took it. He lifted it to his mouth and opened his lips. Then he sucked off the semen.
"I watched him, utterly fascinated and excited. He did what I wanted. He moved my hand to my lips so I could taste the come that was left I sucked it into my mouth-it was still very warm-and let it slide down my throat. Then I lay on the grass, trying to get my breath back.
"To my surprise and delight, Jacques still had an erection and now he knelt next to me. I brought my hand up and touched it again.
"Jacqueline, I don't want to hurt you or make you do anything you do not want to do. But I would very much like to fuck you. I know I will be the first, but I will be very gentle."
"He was gentle and beautiful and powerful. I cried in pain, but also in pleasure, as I received a male organ into my small pussy for the first time. Jacques remained in me a long time before he actually came, which gave me time to get used to the massive invading member. When he did come, I thought my body had been flooded by some boiling liquid. It was an incredible moment, and I nearly fainted. He didn't pull out till his cock was soft, and then we moved down to the stream, where he gently washed and cleansed my pussy.
"I remember one aspect of that experience that is important here because it has to do with my anus. As my cousin was fucking me, I felt blades of grass tickling my little asshole. I remember the feelings very well-so electric, pulsating, stimulating. As our bodies rocked on the grass, my asshole became inflamed with wonderful tingles of pleasure. I didn't mention it to Jacques, but I remember it to this day.
"Let me tell you now about my first experience with anal sex. I was eighteen and I was helping Yvette, a dear friend, with her bookstall. One afternoon, a beautiful hunk of manhood walked up to the stand and bought a book. I thought he was an American, but it turned put he was French, though he had traveled around the world. He was my age, and had dark hair and eyes, and a deep-tanned body. I could see that under what little clothing he had on there was a tremendous body. And I also was very horny that particular day.
"His name was Philippe, as I found out later. We talked about nothing for a few minutes, but we were very much on a sexual level of thought. Before I knew it, he had invited me to his apartment, a nice little place just off boulevard Saint Michel, on the rue Monge. His room had a balcony which overlooked a garden of beautiful flowers. He was a writer and I called him Hemingway, just to tease him.
"He had said he wanted to get into something comfortable, so I sat on the bed and watched him take off his clothes. When he stood there in front of me in his undershorts, I knew that was the something comfortable he was talking about. I knew he expected me to do the same, and I could hardly wait. I stripped bare and lay back on the bed. I felt his eyes burning into my belly and cunt from the other side of the room.
"What a beautiful pussy you have, Jacqueline!" he said in a husky voice. And without another word he pulled me to the edge of the bed and spread my legs apart.
"Oh, Philippe, nibble on my sweet pussy, eat my cunt," I said. Talking during sex makes me much more excited. I think a person should say what he feels, or is thinking.
"He pushed the tender lips of my pussy apart and kissed them gently. Then his long tongue swept between them and pressed firmly into my vaginal canal. He pressed his face as deeply into my crotch as possible and I thought he was going to suck my entire cunt into his mouth! My pussy ached for the feel of his lips and tongue on my throbbing clitoris, and in a moment he was there, biting on the hard nub till my head began to spin.
"I felt a stream of pussy dew trickle out of the crack, into his mouth. I arched my body and wrapped my legs around his head, on his shoulders. I wanted to climax and I didn't want his mouth to pull away before I had reached it. I pushed up hard-too hard-and my cunt lips slid from his lips. Suddenly my asshole pressed to his mouth.
"Philippe sucked on my anus like I had never been sucked before. He pushed his tongue up into it and I felt the muscles giving, felt the hot wet tongue invading that virgin place. I spread my cheeks as far as possible and brought a hand down to play with my pussy lips. His long, brown hair covered my cunt and I pushed some of it in my pussy, which tickled and gave me even more satisfaction.
"He sucked my asshole in an unashamed and uninhibited way. I had been sucked there many times and I often used my finger there when I would masturbate. But now I was thinking of a man's prick being put up there-thinking of Philippe's strong young cock up there. He sucked on the most sensitive part of my entire body. He grabbed my ass cheeks and licked my asshole hard. He twisted his face and dug his nose and chin into me. I gasped in pleasure.
"My fingers worked my clit till they were very wet and tired. My clitoris was swollen to a size I never had felt before, and I knew it was the ecstasy of the ass-suck that was doing it. I wanted the moment never to end, for it was incredibly beautiful. Then I came and my entire body was wracked with spasms. I moaned and as I did, Philippe slid his lips back to my cunt and sucked up all the vaginal fluids as I lay back in ecstasy. When he pulled his head away, my cunt hairs glistened with the mixture of his saliva and my fluids. I turned over and sighed. Philippe sat on the bed next to me.
"That was the best I ever had," I told him honestly.
"You like what I did to your little rear end, didn't you?" he whispered in a seductive voice.
"I turned my head to him and smiled. He placed his hands on my ass and rubbed the cheeks. He told me how beautiful it was, how smooth, how unblemished. Then he kissed it, over and over, and I felt his hard cock rub against my side.
"I want to fuck you in your beautiful ass."
"Yes, I want it too. I want to have you shoot your load deep inside me, then I want to feel your come running down your cock till it drips out of your asshole." I was very excited. I turned over and looked at his cock. My entire body was inflamed in passion.
"He grabbed two pillows and placed them on the center of the bed. I positioned myself on them. It was hard for me to believe it was actually going to happen. His big cock was going to slide up my ass! I had thought of it, dreamed about it, and now it was going to come true. What I wanted most in the world, sexually, was about to happen from this beautiful stranger.
"The cheeks of my ass were elevated, ready to receive his giant member. I spread my legs as Philippe knelt behind me. The sight of my perfectly shaped, slender back and cheeky ass made his cock extra rigid.
"I'm going to fuck your asshole, little girl," he whispered in passion. Then I felt his lips on my anal opening, as he applied saliva. He brought the tip of his cock to my ass. I shivered in anticipation. The head of his cock felt like a battering ram. I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to take it, that he would split me in two.
"I'm going to fuck your asshole," he said again, now pressing the tip of his prick to my hole. He pushed forward and I winced.
"Don't tighten up. The secret is to relax, just relax." He said it so gently, I let my body go limp. I tried not to think of the pain, only the wonderful feelings which were rising from that area of my body. And it worked. I felt the head of his swollen cock pry into my asshole. The muscles of the opening locked around it and he held it there, not moving an inch, till I could breathe regularly. I loved it and I wanted more, all of it!
"Hold on, baby, I'm going to give you all of my love muscle!"
"I held my breath and tried my best to relax, but I was so very excited! The battering ram of cock finally broke through all resistance and he pushed another two inches into me.
"I cried out in pain and anguish-yet it was a cry of love, a cry of encouragement. I loved the hurt I was feeling and I wanted more. I even reached down and felt his cock entering me, as if to make sure it was really happening and not just a dream. It fascinated me that such a huge thing could actually be penetrating me from behind.
"Then he pushed it all in ... I gasped. His cock was buried in my asshole, every inch of that huge organ! Then he pulled back and it slipped halfway out, and then he thrust it in again.
"Going to fuck you crazy," Philippe said, battering his cock in and out of my virgin hole. The forceful thrusts of his prick into my rectum pushed my hips back and forth against the pillows. And as my hips moved, my cunt was also in motion. Thus, I received an anal fuck from the rear while my clitoris was rubbing back and forth against the pillows.
"The saliva Philippe had applied let his cock slip in and out with ease, and the movement provided an intense friction which became a delicious feeling of ecstatic anguish for both of us. Soon Philippe was ready to ejaculate and I waited for it, wanting it, wondering what it would be like.
"We exploded in unison. His cock seemed to burst inside me, just as I let the rush of slippery fluid and excitement flood me. He filled my asshole with his hot come, every drop of it, and I felt it beginning to seep out of my asshole-then it dribbled down my pussy.
"Philippe pulled out of me and lay silently on the bed. I couldn't move. Tears formed in my eyes and I was filled with a feeling of fulfillment and satisfaction.
It had been the best sexual experience of my life. I knew now what real pleasure could be like, and I have experienced it ever since. I think everyone should experiment with sex, all forms of sex, till they find what is right for them, till they find their favorite way of doing it. Mine is anal intercourse and often!
"Philippe is still my friend and we often meet at a little bistro to talk away the night, or to go to one of our apartments and fuck. We like to include a third person, either a man or a woman, it doesn't matter. We have found that orgies-threesomes, bisexuality, call it what you will-are good and often much fun. Just last week Philippe and I performed anal sex for an American who was fascinated with it, but afraid to try it himself. But we did such a good job he masturbated and came twice-while watching us. I think now that he is back in America with his wife, he may be trying to get her to do something with her bottom that she never dreamed about before.
"Life for me is an easy-going thing. I am in no hurry to do anything. And I do what I want sexually. There is nothing I like more in this world than having a nice big cock up my asshole. Oh, I enjoy sucking on them, tasting them, nibbling on them. I like a cunt-fuck now and then, too. I like just about anything. But those are all just preludes, just warm-ups for the best and most important thing: my asshole. I feel fulfilled and complete when there's something up there. And that something can be just about anything-fingers, dildoes, hair brushes, anything!-but preferably it should be a hard cock.
"I get excited just thinking about it!"
In the last chapter we discussed some of the points of libidinal and ego development, with particular reference to the anal-sadistic stage of development. Here, we are concerned with this level of development also. In the case of Jacqueline, who has experienced and still periodically enjoys vaginal coitus as a secondary source of pleasure, we are mainly concerned with the manifestations of penis envy and how this development is connected with anal eroticism.
Helene Deutsch, writes in The Psychology Of Women:
In one way or another, there is no woman in whom one could not discover some traces of the genital trauma in the form of penis envy. In some women, these tendencies are not active, in others they contribute to character formation and produce neurotic symptoms.
Thus, penis envy is a normal development in the psychosexual life of a woman. It is merely a quantitative matter whether it will be aberrative or not.
But penis envy is not the only manifestation of the genital trauma during the phallic or clitoral phase of maturation. During this phase, the young woman lacks an active organ through which she may release her aggressions. Her aggressions turn inward out of necessity. This is a normal occurrence for the character development of the female. Although she is psychologically ready at this time for her receptive and passive function, she is not ready anatomically. As we said she is organless, her vagina is not anatomically ready to take over and compensate for clitoral devaluation until it is penetrated by the male member.
We find Jacqueline at this difficult phase in her life at the start of her story. She is confronted with all the ambivalent feelings so typical of her age. She is inhibited, which is emphasized in her fear that her parents will suspect her curiosity over her cousin Jacques' organ. On the other hand, she is anxiously awaiting her first sexual confrontation with a male. Thrust into this situation, Jacqueline succumbs to her womanly instincts. Finally, we find her completely given over to the idea of sexual pleasure, especially if it has anything to do with anality.
It is difficult to form conclusive opinions with this scanty evidence. But we may assume that she is suffering from a hysterical identification, as a result of a traumatic experience, which has subjected her to the repetition compulsion. Consider Jacqueline's remarks with respect to her apprehension regarding her sexual activities with Jacques, and its closeness with the breaking of the incest taboos. It is evident that she had experienced a shock from this situation.
Under normal circumstances, a young girl in her organless phase regresses to former psycho-sexual pleasure stages as a result of the genital trauma. In other words, until the vagina becomes the heir to sexuality, the anus becomes regressively activated as the primary source of pleasure.
In reference to the reactivated anal stage, we must notice some characteristic differences between Susan and Jacqueline. The former is unable to develop genitality because of her conflict with the incest taboo; guilt is the predominant factor. With Jacqueline, guilt plays practically no role at all in her psychical makeup. Rather, she has succumbed to the repetition compulsion. Thus, we may assume that in Susan's case we are dealing basically with a fantasy wish, and in Jacqueline's case we are dealing with a real situation and an actual event. Although both cases present us with a traumatic psychical reality, the present case is beyond the pleasure principle and may even contradict this principle of mental functioning.
Referring to the repetition compulsion, Freud wrote in Beyond the Pleasure Principle:
It is clear that in their play children repeat everything that has made a great impression on them in real life, and that in doing so they abreact the strength of the impression and, as one might put it, make themselves master of the situation. But on the other hand, it is obvious that all their play is influenced by a wish that dominates them the whole time-the wish to be grown up-and to be able to do what grown-up people do. It can also be observed that the unpleasurable nature of experiences does not always unsuit it for play. If the doctor looks down a child's throat or carries out some small operation on him, we may be quite sure that these frightening experiences will be the subject of the next game; but we must not in that connection overlook the fact that there is a yield of pleasure from another source. As the child passes over from the passivity of the experience to the activity of the game, he hands on the disagreeable experience to one of his playmate and in this way revenges himself on the substitute.
We mentioned that the phallic phase of development takes place usually between the ages of 3 and 6 in the female. The resulting psychical affects resulting from the genital trauma cause a regression. From approximately the ages of 6 to 12, the sexual desires are repressed. Freud has named this period the "latency period of sexual development." But during the puberty phase of physical development sexual desires grow stronger. This is similar in both sexes, and the objects of infantile love are re-cathected with libido. The result is the castration anxiety, which leads the male away from the mother or oedipal situation. The female's situation is complicated with the onset of menstruation. Thus, besides the re-cathexis of libidinal energy toward the mother, the old genital trauma is re-opened and she succumbs to castration anxiety. This anxiety leads the girl away from the mother. She devalues her and transfers her love to the father, hoping to get a child from him. These circumstances lead her into the oedipal situation.
It is of interest to note that a woman's later love for her mother, after the trauma has passed, is proportionate to her ability to overcome penis envy and stop discrediting her mother for her narcissistic wound. Thus, if she is later able to love and identify with her mother, it shows that she is rather well adapted to her anatomical reality and a willingness to accept, her femininity.
Just as a child is forced after his visit to the doctor to repeat the nature of this experience upon his playmates, in order to abreact, as in the Freud's example, Jacqueline is forced to turn this passively experienced trauma into an activity in a similar attempt to eliminate the elements of fear. In this activity, she is in a hysterical identification with her cousin and is repeating compulsively his sexual desires. Of course, there is another yield of pleasure stemming from the fact that the organ for gratification of sexual desires at the age of the genital trauma is the reactivated anus. Also in this activity she revenges herself symbolically upon Jacques, a fact which we cannot overlook.
"I just returned from a holiday in America with my new friend and lover, whose name I cannot tell you because of political reasons. Pierre, a name I'll give him, is very high in the government and I must be discreet.
"Telling you about him tells you much about me and proves a point-but more of that later. Let me tell you how we met.
"I had closed the stand one day when a big black motorcar drove by. I did not really notice it till it circled the street and drove by quite slowly. Then I saw the license plate was of the government, and I wondered who was in it. It continued down the street till it came around again and stopped near me.
"I turned and saw a man sitting in the back seat, smiling at me. He was very handsome and in his forties-a ripe, virile age here in Europe. I knew he looked familiar, but I felt embarrassed and turned away.
"I walked a few steps, and the car followed me. I tried to think who the person was, as he looked so familiar to me. Then it came to me! If it was who I thought it was I knew I would pass out right there. I looked again and the man was still smiling. It was him, I was sure now.
"I walked to the street corner and the chauffeur stopped the car just a few feet from me. The man motioned for me to approach the door, and I did so, after a slight hesitation. I wondered what he wanted-the thought of sex didn't occur to me immediately. I thought perhaps he thought he knew me.
"He was very blunt. He introduced himself and said that he very much desired my body and would I be his guest for dinner? He would reward me handsomely. I didn't want any reward; I was no prostitute. However, I smiled and nodded my head.
"Here is my card. Eight o'clock?"
"I shall be honored," I said softly.
"Oh no, it is I who shall be honored. What is your name?"
"Jacqueline."
"Jacqueline. Till this evening." He took my hand and kissed it, then the window rolled up and the car sped up the street.
"We had a very delicious dinner, and then we retired to his bedroom. I wanted nothing more than to be naked with him. The excitement he generated in me was greater than with any man-partly because of his fame and position, but also because of his charm and kindness. I sincerely liked him, and we found it easy to converse with each other.
"Once in the bedroom, he asked me to take off my clothing slowly so he could watch. He sat in a chair and I stood near the big bed. I removed my clothes ever so slowly. He became increasingly excited as I went on, and when I finally got down to my panties he opened his pants and pulled out a large, perfectly shaped cock. He held it tight in both hands, his eyes glued to my panties.
"I turned around and pulled them down over my smooth buttocks. He moaned in satisfaction when he saw the crevice of my asshole, and I bent over just a bit to spread them so he could see between them. Then I turned around and faced him full-front. He stared at my pussy and then jumped to the floor and, in a kneeling position, buried his face between my legs.
"I wriggled my body so nay panties fell around my ankles and stepped out of them. Lifting one leg into the air, my cunt lips were spread wide so he could eat all of it. Pierre was certainly an expert-he knew what he was doing. His tongue slid in and out of me with expertise, and my throbbing clitoris was all his. I put my leg down on the floor and spread my pussy lips wide with my hands, bending my knees (it reminded me of a dance class my mother enrolled me in when I was young) and pressed forward against his face.
"Pierre followed my every move. His mouth didn't leave my pussy once, even as I moved into a stooping position in front of him. As I did so, I could feel my asshole was open wide just a few inches from the floor. He lay flat on the floor now, with his head propped up on his hands, lapping at my cunt like a little puppy dog. Then he moved one finger down to my ass and my entire body shivered. I gasped.
"Ah," he said pulling his head away, "I have found the spot Mademoiselle Jacqueline finds most exciting?"
"Ah, oui, oui," I said over and over. He looked up at me and smiled and then went back to my pussy. My cunt lips were wide open and I was already wet with my own fluids. The touch of his finger on my anus had done it, had started me off, and I knew there would be no stopping me!
"Then he did it again-rubbed his finger lightly over the opening of my asshole. I wanted him to put it in me, so I could feel his tongue up my cunt and his finger up my asshole, but he only played there, teasing. Then he pulled his face away again and looked up at me.
"Darling Jacqueline, I must eat your little bottom."
"I lay back on the floor and lifted my legs into the air, grabbing my ankles with my hands. He came at me furiously and pressed his head against my spread ass cheeks. I screamed with ecstasy. His tongue wormed around in my anal opening, pushing lightly, forcing just the tip in. It brushed the hairs that lined the lips and even reached up to stroke my pussy lips. Then he tightened the muscles of his tongue as I relaxed the muscles in my body. His tongue poked into me and penetrated my hole.
"The feeling was sensuous and exciting. I was lifted into a world of pleasure where nothing existed except sexual feeling. Saliva gushed out of Pierre's mouth and made the penetration easier. He pushed his tongue in as far as it would possibly go and I felt as though a cock were up there!
"Fuck my asshole with your tongue," I cried out.
"And he did so. He grabbed both cheeks of my ass and rubbed them in his hands. With his stiffened tongue, he shot a tongue fuck into my asshole with such intensity and fury I thought I was going up in flames. My clitoris was erect and I reached down and felt it with my hand and manipulated it as he pierced my asshole with his tongue.
"I started to tremble and my body was covered with goose pimples. The sensations I was now feeling in my asshole were unlike any I had ever experienced. I knew it would be the best climax ever, the most satisfying, the most gratifying. I stiffened and cried out my pleasure.
"The dam broke under the flood. My vaginal walls poured out their secretions, they dripped down over his face, but he didn't stop. His tongue was still sliding in and out of my asshole. It wasn't until the sensation was completed that I finally relaxed and had to pull his head away from my asshole. I think he would have sucked on it all night.
"His cock was stiffer than ever. He stood up and quickly took off his clothes. I was surprised-and happy-to see a very well-developed body, with strong arms, a hairy chest, and enormous balls. He fell to his knees on the floor next to me and positioned himself over my body. I opened my mouth and he moved his hanging balls over my lips. Then he came down and I took them, sucking them into my warm wet mouth, as he had sucked on my asshole. I caressed them with my tongue and he moved his body up and down, so his balls were actually fucking my mouth! Finally, I could no longer keep my mouth wide open, and he moved off and held his penis above my face. I kissed the tip of it and then he began to caress and rub my face with it. He held the head in his fingers and rubbed it gently over my forehead, over my eyelids, over my soft cheeks and lips. A drop of clear fluid fell from the tip onto my cheek and he wiped it all over my face with the head of his cock. It dried there, coated on my face. Then I took his cock in my mouth and let him fuck my face. His balls slammed against my chin each time he shoved the huge member down' my throat. Even then I was thinking about it going into my asshole.
"I sucked him till he nearly came. He pulled out and bent down and kissed me. Then he moved his face to my breasts and nibbled on each hard nipple, murmuring soft words of love.
"I'm going to fuck you," he finally said, again kissing my face.
"Where?" I asked, reaching down to grasp his hot cock.
"Anywhere you would like, dearest Jacqueline," he replied, already knowing where I wanted it.
"I think you know where."
"Ah, oui, I think I do know very well."
"Please, do it now ... please fuck my ass!"
"I hadn't had anal intercourse in some three weeks and I was dying for it. We positioned ourselves in front of a wall mirror, so I could watch what was happening. Pierre positioned me by placing two big pillows under my midsection. This raised up the cheeks of my buttocks. Then I spread my legs apart and the cheeks of my ass parted and offered my anus to him. Pierre got on his knees behind me and applied lubrication to his cock and then to my asshole. It was cold and mushy, but it added even more excitement to the already ecstatic situation.
"His huge prick was now poised directly over the cheeks of my ass. I could watch the entire action in the wall mirror in front of me. And while I felt terror-stricken, as I always do when a cock is entering my behind-it still adds to my excitement-I watched with interest and great anticipation.
"He nestled the head of his cock between the cheeks of my ass. The feeling of his cock there unleashed waves of lust throughout my entire body, and I could again feel my clit budding and swelling in my pussy.
"Pierre pushed and the tip of his cock entered my asshole. I braced myself and bit my lips. He applied his pressure with a firm even stroke, pushing the walls apart to admit the rest of his cock. It was much thicker around the base and it became more difficult to get into me.
"But he did. He started thrusting and hammering away like a madman. My sensations of pain were very slight. The fucking movement in my asshole filled me only with pleasure and a great feeling of completeness. My eyes were glazed with lust. I gave up looking in the mirror and closed my eyes to enjoy the feeling of electricity generating from my anus.
"We began to synchronize our movements, pushing and pulling, fucking the living shit out of each other. The cream widened the hole and made our labors of deep penetration easier. I thrust my ass upwards each time he rammed his penis into my hole, and the narrow walls of the passage finally permitted fast, easy strokes of fucking. When the entire length of his cock was buried in me, I reached down and felt his balls hanging down over the bottom of my pussy lips. I rubbed his testicles and he moaned, and then started fucking again. Our bodies were wracked with incredible feelings of power and excitement. All I could think of or feel was that magnificent spear of flesh that had punctured the hole of rear-end love. That spear that was now all the way in me!
"Pierre's penis began to swell up to an even greater length and thickness. I knew his cock was going to come in my asshole any minute, and that's when I let everything go and no longer tried to restrain myself. And so, with our minds awhirl, and our spirits soaring crazily around the intense sexuality of the scene, his genitals blew out the secretions of his passion. The hot torrent of come quickly filled my rectal passage to capacity and then spilled over the hole and leaked down the cheeks of my ass. When the last bit of semen had spurted from the tip of his enormous cock, it softened and slid out of my asshole.
"Neither of us could say a word. There was nothing to say. It had been perfect, we had not been afraid to do what we liked best. He didn't state it, but I knew he loved to fuck a girl in the ass just by the way he performed. It was doubly great for we had reached orgasms at the same moment.
"As we lay there on the floor of his sumptuous bedroom, it occurred to me once again just who he was and another shiver of excitement ran down my spine. I wondered if I had pleased him enough to have him invite me back again?
"My answer came the next day. He rang up and asked me to a party the following weekend. I accepted. It was one of the most memorable evenings of my life. The party was attended by famous government people, painters, movie and stage stars, writers. I felt honored to be with one of the most sought-after bachelors in the country-or in the world, for that matter. Many women stared at me in envy and I thought to myself, go ahead and stare-you would only want vaginal intercourse with this man-you would not know how to please him! I felt very proud and very lucky.
"After the party I thanked him and he asked me to spend the evening at his house. "I already have an erection just thinking about your lovely buttocks," he said in the back seat of the car.
"I reached over and grasped his penis through his pants, and played with it all the way to the house. We stripped off our clothing immediately upon entering the bedroom, and he applied the lubricating cream to his cock while I positioned myself on the bed. He did it facing me, so we could kiss and he could fondle and nibble on my breasts. I held my legs in the air till his cock had been shoved all the way up my ass, then I locked them around his powerful shoulders.
"He moved in slow, even strokes until his cock swelled and finally shot! I felt every moment, every spurt, every move. He filled me with his hot liquid and his tongue searched out the deep recesses of my mouth. Then he pumped his cock some more and his-come spilled out, wetting the bed.
"I gasped as he continued fucking me even after he had come. Then I felt his fingers digging between us, finding my clit in all its wetness. Soon he was playing with me and he brought me off and kept his cock hard the entire time, still fucking my asshole. It was an amazing evening and I felt even closer to him.
"I knew I was falling in love. I didn't reject the thought. I only hoped he felt the same. But it was difficult to tell because of his position and of his need to be discreet. I received beautiful gifts from him and he sent me money for a new and beautiful apartment. I didn't feel these things were payment for my services. They were gifts from someone who liked me very much. It was all going so well!
"But then I started to be mentioned in columns of the newspapers and one of them even did a story called "Who Is She?" No one could find out who I was, as I never gave an interview. I considered my private life very private, indeed. But it upset Pierre and soon we had to discuss it. Many people had linked us romantically, we had to come up with a past for me, I had to have some importance. It is a long story, but we made up some things and people believed them. Then we went to America and had a wonderful vacation. The bad part of our relationship-the only bad part-began last week, after we had returned.
"We had little time alone in America, thus we had little sex. Every now and then, between appointments, we would be able to get in a quick anal fuck, but it was rare. We were both looking forward to our return to Paris so we could again live a less hectic life and be able to have sex at our leisure.
"Pierre's best friend Tomas, actually a distant cousin, dropped in soon after our return. He had been in Spain for a few years, and he asked Pierre for a place to stay for a few months until he got some money together. Pierre invited him to stay at the house, and since I'm always there, we have become a threesome.
"This would be fine with me, but the first time we shared in sex-and I liked it because Tomas is young, good-looking and has a powerful cock-I knew it would never work. Tomas hinted that he did not approve of anal intercourse. Instead of talking about it and getting him to try it, as I would have done, Pierre pretended to agree with him, so we had a night of straight oral and vaginal sex. Tomas is not afraid to take Pierre's cock into his mouth, nor is he afraid of fucking my mouth while Pierre fucks me. He will do anything-anything short of analism.
"When we were alone, I begged Pierre not to be a hypocrite. But he thought Tomas would look down upon him for our deviation. Deviation! I never considered any form of lovemaking a deviation. But Pierre wanted it kept secret, because should Tomas tell others ...
"One evening after Tomas had been having sex with us for a few days-and he was good at it, I'll admit that-he invited another girl to join us. The four of us had a good time, but the evening did not include anal sex. Oh, there was some kissing of assholes, but no penetration by the male organ.
"The nights left me with an increasing passion for anal sex. Pierre fucked me in the ass after breakfast one morning, when he saw how upset I was. I just stood up and lifted my nightgown to my waist after the servants left the room. He dropped his robe and put butter all over his cock. Then, as I bent over the croissants and jellies, he shoved his cock into my asshole and pumped me till I came. Just after we had finished, Tomas walked in, I wished he had come in a minute earlier!
"And this is where I am and this is where I leave you. I love Pierre very much, but I am very afraid that the gap between us will widen. If he cannot be honest with his friends regarding all matters, including sex, then how can we have an honest, loving relationship? If my desires and his own desires mean so little to him, then I should want no part of that man.
"But I love him and cannot break. Instead, I have been forced to do something else-I have been seeing other men, men who will stick their hot cocks up my asshole and give me what I need, men who care nothing about what people think. We hear so much about women's liberation these days. I think we should hear more about the liberation of self! If a person wants and prefers anal intercourse, he or she should practice it, whether or not friends or the world approves. You must do what you desire.
"I only know that I feel my best when there is a big cock driving up my asshole, ripping me apart, filling me, making me burst with its load of hot come."
A prognosis in this case is an extremely difficult task. Jacqueline's well-being is dependent upon her ability to recognize her enslavement to the repetition compulsion. Possibly, the abreaction of this event will have a therapeutic benefit, but certainly not a complete one. Other factors also come into account here. First of all, her fixation upon the anal stage of psychosexual development, and, secondly, the infringement of the incest taboo, even if it had only a small effect upon this aberration, still plays a part.
But most important are the circumstances of Jacqueline's credo of life. She expresses herself in the words, "You must do what you desire," and has a tendency to depreciate her love objects for their inability to follow this philosophy. The question is whether or not she has actually formed, in any of these relationships, a love transference. Her sexuality is almost purely dominated by her desire for pleasure. Affection plays a very limited part in all of these alliances. Unfortunately, we have no knowledge of the relationship between Jacqueline and her parents, and this information is imperative before we can form a conclusive prognosis ...