Chapter 1
Sheri L. is a tall, sultry girl in her early twenties. Bright and exciting, she epitomizes the free-thinking and free-wheeling woman of the '70's.
Born and raised in Los Angeles, Sheri has led a life that would have most likely driven lesser personalities into an institution. But her strength lies in her ability to understand, and accept, human nature.
During our interview, which lasted for twenty-four hours, Sheri expressed herself openly and with animation. Using her finely sculptured body, with flaring breasts and long, sensuous legs, she became a total entity within herself. Every word and thought was accompanied by movement and mime, adding almost a dramatic reconstruction of the events of her life.
Sheri's experiences with her own father, and how that situation came to pass, are revealed by her in this interview. She has left nothing out, and sometimes the verve with which she describes her experiences even startled me.
As a leadoff case in our study of incest between fathers and daughters, I think Sheri's case to be of exceptional value because of her personality and because of the honesty and insight with which she describes her own sexual experiences.
L.A. has always been my home. I have never lived anywhere else, and really don't plan to. I guess it's somewhat typical that what happened to me happened in Los Angeles. I don't mean that this city promotes this kind of behavior, but that in L.A. there seems to be a greater chance of these kinds of things happening.
Look at it this way. We, my mother and father and myself, lived in a ranch style home out in the valley. There was a swimming pool out in the backyard and plenty of grass and trees. The setting was natural and open. It was natural that when I reached a certain age, like fifteen, I would start experiencing my own body. This is exactly what happened and it is what led eventually to my relationship with my father.
My parents traveled a lot. Both of them were in businesses which took them out of town. When I became fifteen, they finally decided that I was old enough to be left alone. That was during the summer when they decided that, and it was during that same summer that I really began finding out what sex was all about.
The first day after they had left, I took off all my clothes and began running around in the backyard in the nude. My breasts were pretty good, and my body was strong and kind of lean. I really enjoyed the feeling of the air against my nipples and the warmth that developed between my thighs. I felt sensual and alive, and daring enough to be standing naked out in the broad daylight.
Until that time, I hadn't really played with myself very much. My body was just kind of there, and it didn't matter too much to me what I did with it. But that summer changed all that and I began to notice how I worked sexually.
I dove into the pool and let the water run all over me, up between my legs and everything. I threw my hand between my thighs and brought it up to my fur. The lips there felt strange, soft and even and with the warmth of the water. I put my finger between them and pushed it up inside my vagina. The feeling was so overwhelming that
I thought I would faint.
Then, I pulled myself over to the edge of the pool where the coping ran. I threw my leg up onto the side and began rubbing my cunt along the hard cement. I guess at the time I was stimulating my clit, and chills and spasms shot through my body like crazy. It was all really too much, laying there on the side of the pool masturbating like that. I felt myself to be pretty fucking daring, and that added to the excitement.
After I was finished, I lay down on the grass, still naked, and just let the warm sun drift lazily over my skin. I spread my legs and felt that warmth creep up between them, warming the fine little hairs of cunt and making them prickle.
At that time, I had noticed that next door to us there was a boy about my age. He was tall, blonde and very good-looking. He never spoke to me, and seemed to be withdrawn into himself so I never got to know him.
It wasn't until much later that I realized that he has actually been watching me cavort in the nude, himself jacking off during the whole show!
Actually, I was the first one to get caught at our strange little game of voyeurism. One day, when I was naked and going through my little ritual out in the yard, I caught a look through the fence of somebody on the other side.
There was a little gap in the wood where I could look through and see into the other yard. I positioned myself up against the fence and peered through, my heart beating faster and faster at what I saw.
Laying on the grass, stark naked and with a huge hard-on, was David, the blonde guy. His legs were pointing towards me and were spread widely. I could see his balls hanging down between with the huge, pink rod rising like the Washington Monument towards the sky. I felt my cunt begin to moisten at the sight, and pushed my pelvis firmly up against the wall.
David began playing with himself. He took his prick into his hand and began jerking himself off, slowly at first but increasing his speed with each passing second. The harder he pushed, the warmer my cunt got.
Finally, I threw my legs apart and pushed my fingers up inside me. I tried to match my own movements with his, shoving my fingers up inside each time he threw his own pelvis skyward. v
When his white juices shot into the air, I felt myself begin to throb and pulsate. I kept after it until he had finished.
That's when he saw me. For some reason, he sat up and looked towards the fence. His eyes widened, he jumped to his feet and ran towards me, his prick bouncing up and down and waving in the wind.
I was frozen behind the wall, unable to run but fearful of staying. My hand was still up inside my cunt, and my thighs were clenched so tightly around it that it was aching from the pressure.
"You enjoy the show?" he asked, peering through the slit in the fence.
I couldn't speak, but tried to smile to show him that I was really in control.
"I do it everyday about this time. So, tomorrow, you can tune in again and get your rocks off, okay?"
Then, he did something which began the momentum of our relationship. He took his cock, still hardened, and shoved it through the hole in the fence. I tried to back away as I saw the pink, hot tip coming closer, but couldn't.
"You should be tired of watching, Sheri." He said, as the heated skin touched my belly, just above the line where my cunt hair ended.
"Yyyess..." I muttered, feeling a shot of electricity through my body as his skin touched mine.
We stood like that for a few seconds, then
I began moving my belly up and down against his prick. I looked closely at the throbbing head, and bulbous tip, then reached down and touched it.
"That's better, now you'll get some of the real thing!"
His skin was like hot rubber, and each time I moved my shaking fingers around the head, it seemed to shake a little.
"Put your mouth to it, Sheri, and blow me.
I was insulted at his words, but the thought really appealed to me. I leaned down and faced the prick head on. I blew warm air onto it, then stabbed at the hole with my tongue.
"That's it, baby, now you're getting to it!"
I ran my tongue around the head, and then put my lips to it. It tasted salty and kind of fleshy, but it wasn't a bad kind of taste. Finally, I encircled it all and took the whole tip into my mouth. Up and down I ran along the shaft, working my tongue feverishly against the skin as I went.
David couldn't move because he would have gotten splinters on his dick. He just had to stand there while I sucked him off. When he finally came, I backed off, not wanting to take his come into my mouth.
The prick just shuddered and spurted through the fence, his seed spilling onto the grass in the backyard which I had helped my father plant three years ago.
After it was over, David pulled himself from the fence and looked through the hole. He examined my naked body, his eyes moving sporadically around behind the fence.
"Spread your legs and let me see you there!"
I moved in closer, then spread my legs and pulled my lips apart. He had a clear shot of my warm, pink skin and the juices which seemed to flow from there with remarkable consistency.
"Very nice. You want to fuck?"
Suddenly, I didn't want him anymore. There was something inside me which drove me away from meeting him anywhere except through this fence. I guess maybe it was his abruptness, but whatever the reason, I didn't want him.
"No, David," I replied, closing my thighs and pulling away from the fence, "I don't want to fuck you!"
"Cunt!! ! " He screamed, loud enough for the neighbors to hear.
But I left him, not wanting to cause a scene or let him talk me into something I didn't want. The whole thing was too impersonal for my blood. The desire to have a man's penis between my legs was certainly there, but there was also the need for something more. For some reason, the fact that he had been masturbating out there, just like myself, turned me off to him and made me think of him in a bad way. I mean, if he couldn't do anything better as a man than just lay out there in the sunshine, then he wasn't much of a man!
Whatever the reasons, I decided not to go out into the backyard any more, but stay inside the house and do something constructive with myself.
The next day my father returned from his business trip. He looked tan and well, and told me that everything had gone quite well. I asked him about Mom, but he kind of shrugged his shoulders and dropped the conversation. It was then that the thought occurred to me that she was having an affair of some kind and because of that, Dad was very hurt.
I tried to take over the household and make things as pleasant as possible. I cooked the meals, provided him with small talk and tried looking my best. He didn't really pay attention to me like I wanted him to, but I kept at it. I realize now that I was trying desperately to take the place of my mother ... become her and play the role she used to play with him. That sounds kind of sick now, but then it made a lot of sense.
The sexual thing with him really did not begin to bloom until after he had been home for about a week. After the scene in the backyard with David, I had grown really interested in men. I mean, everywhere I went, I would size up the men I saw and try to imagine what hung between their legs. I had heard of women in middle-age going prick crazy, and I guess that was happening to me. I dreamed of penises, in all shapes and sizes, and desperately wanted the feel of one between my legs ... I guess something to bring me down to Earth with that same feeling I had had with David.
Then one night, I gathered enough nerve to begin something. I heard him taking a bath upstairs and decided to go inside the bathroom. I crept up the stairs, shaking with anticipation and worrying like crazy about what he would do when he saw me. But there was something inside me pushing me on, something which drove all the fears and doubts from inside me and made me want to seek him out.
I opened the bathroom door carefully, trying not to make a sound. The room was filled with steam, and I could see his hulky outline behind the shower curtain. Dad was a big man, tall and heavy, who had gone kind of soft with middle-age. But there was still something of the animal in him. The way he walked, with his shoulders hunched over and his head jutting forward gave me the feeling that he was stalking his next victim. He excited me in a strange way, also, knowing that he had been with many women. In my strangest moments I felt what better way to begin my sex life with a man who I knew loved me and also had all that experience.
I stood in the center of the bathroom for what seemed like hours-unable to reveal my presence yet unable to run away. Finally, I called out to him.
"Would you like your back washed?"
"Sheri!! ! " he yelled, peering around the edge of the shower curtain. "What in hell are you doing here?"
I tried to recover myself, but was too hurt to do anything. "Goddamn you" I shouted, "Go to hell!! ! "
And I turned and ran from the room, crying and upset because he had rejected me. I threw myself down upon my bed and tried to go to sleep, or at least get away from everything as much as possible.
In the blackness of the room, I smelled the moist odor of his body next to me. I could feel the warmth of his bath pouring out all over me, then his hand was on the back of my neck, rubbing that place gently.
"I'm sorry I yelled, it was just kind of shocking, that's all."
I rolled over and looked up at him. He was naked except for the towel, and I could see the bulge beneath the cloth where his penis was.
"It's all right, Dad, I just wanted to make you feel better. I know how Mom must have hurt you."
"That's all over now. It's just you and me from now on and we've got to make it the best way we can ... O.K.? "
I smiled and began playing with the small hairs near his navel, right where the top of his towel rested. I wanted so badly to see his sex, to hold his stiff prick that had once driven hard and hot inside my mother and dumped the white semen that had eventually produced me. But if my action was too abrupt, then I'm sure I would have driven him away. After all, he was my father, even though both my parents were gone so much of the time that neither one of them felt much like even a relative.
"Now you go to sleep. Tomorrow, I'll take you to the beach."
He left the room, holding that dumb towel around his waist and never letting go. But at least the next day we would spend at the beach together and that was enough for right then.
The day was hot and windy. Dad and I drove down through Malibu and found a nice secluded beach at the foot of a small cliff. We were in a happy mood, and the day seemed right for everything that might happen.
I was wearing my bikini and felt really sexy in it. My body was slim and firm, and it felt good to feel my tits bouncing around beneath the thin strap of the bra. I noticed more than once my father's eyes planted on my chest, looking at me as though I were a real woman instead of a little girl. That really made me happy, and added much to my daring mood that day.
The beach was empty, and we took a spot near the end where a huge rock jutted out into the ocean. Dad lay down on the blanket and stretched himself towards the sun. I looked at him for a while, and began to see him more and more as just a man instead of my father. This kind of weird viewpoint had become a normal thing with me, and after a while, I got used to the idea. At first, the thought of him as a man, singular and unattached, revolted and scared me, but as time went on, I grew to like the idea. There was something exciting and daring about it, something in it that released me from a plaguing feeling I had always had. I guess you could call it growing up or something. Whatever it was, though, I really enjoyed it.
"Would you put some lotion on me?"
My father smiled and looked pleased that I had asked him to do this.
I rolled over on my stomach and reached up behind me and unsnapped my bra. I felt a chill shoot through me as my breasts fell free from the garment, and I tried lifting myself just a little on my elbows so that maybe he would be able to see my nipples.
He began rubbing my back, pulling his strong hands along my spine and working the cream down into my pores. He reached the top of my ass and kind of played with the skin there, kneading and warming it under the powerful force of his hands.
"You're going to be something else, baby, a real looker!"
"You're not bad yourself ... for an old man."
That broke him up. He slapped me on the ass, but left his hand there a second too long, kind of pushing down into the soft flesh of my cheek. I felt like I would burst apart, but then he took his hand away and worked some more on my back.
I knew as he worked his way up and down my back that he was getting turned on. I think the fact that we were at the beach and everything took away the definition he had of me as his daughter. He was looking at me as though I were a woman, and that made me feel good.
"You've got nice hands, daddy, like you really know what you're doing."
He chuckled a little and told me that he had 'been around.'
Then I decided to do something real daring. I rolled over on my back, exposing my tits to his eyes and smiling up at him.
"You like me?" I asked, arching my back just a little so that the breasts would seem larger than they actually were.
"I've always liked you, Sheri, you know that."
I didn't know how to take that answer. Was he putting me on? Or was he serious but still talking as my father. The fact that I was showing him my breasts, out there on that beach though, made everything he said take on a different light.
"You're very nice, there, sweetie, very nice."
"Touch them ... please..."
I took his hand, still creamy and white, and placed it on my nipple. He took the bud, watching it grow as he kneaded it between his forefinger and thumb.
"You're becoming a real woman, yes sir, a real woman."
I pulled his head down onto me. Just before his lips reached my nipple, he threw a strange look. It was like he was asking me if this was really what I wanted. I nodded my head and pulled him closer. We were no longer looking at each other through the masks of a family, but as a man looks at a woman. Everything that had come before this was being washed away, thrown back into time where it didn't belong to either of us. The only thing that belonged now was this moment.
And the moment was becoming better and better. He drove with his tongue around the edge of the nipple, then stabbed at the tip. I felt electric charges through every nerve ending, and wanted desperately for him to bite me there. I ached terribly, and pulled his head forcefully even tighter against my tit.
"Suck me, daddy, suck me hard!"
He was really working on me when he started slowly moving his hand downwards. He crossed my stomach, then reached the elastic tops of my bikini panties.
"Oh God," I moaned, waiting on the edge of the abyss, "please go down there ... please, daddy!"
His hand went underneath the panties. I could feel the warmth of his fingers as he played with the top edge of my fur. His fingers were gentle, and well-practiced. He knew exactly where he was going, and seemed in no rush to get there.
"Finger me ... put your finger inside me!" I threw my legs apart, pushing my knee into his groin. I could feel his strength there, hard and pulsating beneath his swimming trunks. It felt good, and I knew he was strong. There was something really secure in the fact that he had what he had there, and I kneaded his balls and prick with my knee.
Underneath my panties, he traced the line of my crack down through the jungle of my cunt. He was an explorer on a continent he knew well from the outside. Now, after fifteen years of raising and caring for me, he was finally allowed into the secrets of my darkness. It made me feel good to think that he had actually wanted this all his life, and that if it hadn't been for my boldness, he would have never achieved it.
My juices were really flowing as he placed his finger on the outer edge of my vagina. Then he found my clit and began toying with it. It was driving me crazy, and I was pumping up and down into the air of the beach. Then his finger went deep inside me. I was beginning to feel full down there but knew I would never feel all the way until finally his huge, throbbing prick was inside me. That was where I finally wanted him, plunging deep inside and with all the force he had within himself.
"Oh God" I moaned, now losing control of where I was and any sense of modesty, "take off my panties ... please, take them off!! ! "
I raised my hips and he slid the small panties down my legs and threw them onto the sand. I was naked, writhing and aroused beneath the warm flesh of my own father. There was almost too much happening at one time to really take everything in, but the thoughts bit at my mind, developing then fading quickly only to return again and haunt me.
His mouth began traveling downwards. I threw my legs even wider apart, and arched my pelvis up towards him. He looked down between my thighs, and spread my lips there.
"Beautiful ... you're gorgeous there, honey."
"Eat it, daddy, suck me ... there ... hurry..
He leaned down between my legs and blew a hot stream of air into my crack. I took in his gift and rolled with it, feeling my lips teasing with the air around them and throbbing like crazy.
As he drew closer and closer, I could feel the warmth of his lips. Finally, he kissed my clit, then my vagina where he drove his tongue inside me and began playing his tune.
"Ooooh ... your prick, give me your prick!! ! " I was going crazy. Naked and writhing, I was screaming into the warm daylight, unaware of everything but his mouth at my cunt and the looming presence of his meat.
He threw his butt around and his groin was now facing me. I tore at his trunks and finally managed to pull them halfway down. His prick popped out of its confinement and faced me.
It was a beautiful prick, long, thick and shiny. All the years of use and it still looked like it could have been on a boy half my father's age. I took the length of it into the palm of my hand and began pulling at it. His pelvis began moving just slightly with each tug, and I wondered just how long he would be able to last.
My mouth opened like in a dream as I took him inside. He was huge, and there wasn't much I could with all of him. I just had to take whatever I could between my lips and blow him that way.
Meanwhile, he was working like crazy on my clit, and virtually driving me up a wall. I felt like I was on the verge, and ready to come.
"Fuckme ... hurry, daddy, fuck me!! ! "
He withdrew his mouth and pulled his cock from between my lips. As I waited for him to turn around, I realized I was on the threshold of having that huge, vibrant piece of meat between my legs. The thought made me cream even more and I, tore at his shoulders, hoping to make him move faster.
Finally, he loomed above me. He smiled down, showing his even, white teeth. I kissed him gently on the lips and pushed my tongue into his mouth. We held there while he slowly pushed his cock into my throbbing cunt.
"Ahhhh ... God, it feels good..."
Inch by inch, he pushed his way inside. I began to feel totally filled by him, on the verge of complete satiation. It was the most incredible feeling I had ever had, like that he was taking all of me and pulling it into himself. Our bodies were meshing, playing with each other, and leaving he and myself behind to gaze at one another and to experience it all.
He began slowly, moving rhythmically and with ease up and down the length of my vagina. I held tightly onto his large shoulders, almost afraid to move myself because he was so large. Also, I could feel the trouble he was having keeping himself under control. I felt good that I had turned him on so much that he couldn't control it.
"Daddy," I cried, thrusting my hips upwards for another inch of him, "come. Come if you want to. It's all right ... there will be other times ... "
"Thank you, sweetie..." And he came. Shot like a fire hose that has just had all the pressure released he came into my, his daughter's, cunt. I held him tightly, now feeling for the first time his own weakness and his vulnerability. This man, my father, was just a man. Strong and weak, he was now sinking everything he had into me. I could see why he had been popular with women. He gave everything he had when he fucked, and really made you feel wanted. He was a good man, and at that moment, I never wanted to leave him.
After that day at the beach, my father and
I made our own little household. I became, virtually, the wife of the home and maintained my duties. It was a wonderful two months. During that time, he taught me everything he knew about sex and I gave him everything I had. We got along well, and there seemed to be nothing that would ever take us apart.
But we were living in a dream world where none of the reality of our existence ever entered. There was no one or nothing that could remind us of what we were doing. To us, it was a new world, a world which didn't have the sexual taboos of incest. As far as we were concerned, whenever we made love and had sex, the laws which applied to other people simply didn't exist.
Then mother came home. Father had told me that she was living with another man up North, and he felt sure that she would never return. I was happy about this, feeling like he was my man now, and anybody who desired to take him away from me would have to fight for him. I was at once jealous and worried when we heard that she was returning.
We were laying around in bed on a Sunday morning. Naked and sleepy, we had had some coffee, watched a little football on the television, and were feeling very good. Then, the phone had rung. It had been Mom. She told my father that she was only two hours from home and would be there that morning.
"Are you going to let her come back?" I asked, feeling as though my entire world was crashing around me.
"I don't know, sweetie," he replied, looking away from me outside the window.
"Well, maybe this will help you make up your mind."
I took his penis into my hand and began rubbing it. But nothing happened. He was still looking absently out the window. I drew myself down between his legs and licked the inside of his thighs. As I worked up between them, licking his balls and the space between them, I realized that this was the end. When I took his cock into my mouth, stabbing at the hole with my tongue but still getting no response, I was sure that everything we had had together was ending just like that. One phone call, one word from a woman who had cheated on him and hurt his pride, and reality stormed back into our little world.
"It's over isn't it?" I asked, pulling my lips away from his soft penis, feeling like running away before he could answer me. But his lack of response, that faraway look in his eye was all I needed. I got up from the bed, looked down upon the naked body of my father, and walked from the room.
As I left the house, I saw my mother driving up in her car. She looked eager, and kind of kept. There was an air about her which told of plans and schemes. I knew she would scheme with him, and that he would take that scheming because she was the woman he loved. I never returned to that house again. I knew that there could never be any kind of normal family relationship between us. I was the one who had to leave, the one who had to sacrifice my home because of that.
As it turned out, I'm not bitter about it. I know that naturally, the situation could not have come to any more than it did. I don't resent what I did, but sometimes the confusion over it is remarkable. I guess that's how these things work on you.
SUMMARY
Sheri L. found herself in what be classified as a 'normal' emotional situation where cases of incest have been recorded. The situation, with the fact the mother was absent and the girl was there, led to the involvement between Sheri and her father. It was a need fulfilled by both of them, and that need disappeared when the mother finally returned.
In Sheri's perspective, her father represented a strong and manly figure. Her complaint against David, the fact that he just lay around all day sunning himself, indicates that she had strong feelings about the roles which men should play. Her father, with his success in business and his worldly ways, provided her with this image. Her troubles in the future may rest in the fact that not all men are built like her father. What Sheri needs to do now is to drop the image from her mind, reflect only upon the experience and go from there with a clean bill of slate. It has often been said by experts that incestual relationships harm the child because of this very fact that they become so attached to the incestual parent that they can never achieve a satisfactory relationship outside the family. In Sheri's case, the potential for this situation to haunt her is quite high.
The father in this case was a man who allowed himself to replace the image of his wife by that of his daughter. It is quite possible that at first he was enamoured by the nudity and sexual nature of his 'little girl,' But as time went on, it became clear that she represented to him only a replacement for the missing wife. This theory is confirmed by the fact that when the wife did call, the father was unable to achieve any sexual response to his daughter's moves.
Father-daughter incest is a very strong emotional occurrence. As evidenced by this case, it can have long-lasting effects on both parties and create trauma in later life. Hopefully, both Sheri and her father will be able to work out the relationship they had and find new ways in which to respond to others in the future.