Chapter 4
The shrill persistence of a distant car horn cut through the blur around her brain and impelled Jo Ann back to awareness. Smoothing her rumpled dress down over her legs, she pulled herself to her knees and then stopped abruptly. The ground trembled beneath her. She lurched forward, gasping. The spasms in her stomach crashed and rolled turbulently until she thought she'd pass out. And then, she rolled back onto her haunches to recuperate in the sudden, welcome aftermath of total calm.
The tree trunk was rough but Jo Ann hugged it tightly to remain upright. She wanted to walk, but her head refused to stop throbbing and her feet refused to move. She couldn't feel anything of the rest of her body ... almost as though it wasn't there anymore. Her strength was gone. Her free will a thing of the past. And she knew she would never again be able to look herself in the eye without remembering what had happened to her ... and why.
The wind made the branches above her sway and suddenly fright took over. It rushed up all at once ... the awareness, the pain, the horrible memory of what had happened and what now remained. Jo Ann forced herself to take one step and then another. She could walk. She wasn't dead yet. Hot tears rolled down her cheeks.
The exit onto Central Park South appeared miraculously before her and Jo Ann flung herself toward it. Panting for breath, she managed to make it to the street and almost smiled at the sight of moving traffic and distant pedestrians. At least she wasn't completely alone any longer. And despite the pain, she knew the worst was over.
An old man and his wife stopped to look quizzically at her, but Jo Ann kept on running. She didn't know where she was headed, but she didn't want to stop. There was a strange comfort in motion ... the awareness that she was free again. The knowledge that despite everything, she had survived.
The Fifty Ninth Street circle was practically deserted when Jo Ann reached it. She was tempted to find a bench and rest awhile where it was safe, but thought better of it. Once she sat, she couldn't be at all sure of the strength necessary to get up again. Better to get indoors ... where somebody could take care of her.
But who? Jo Ann made a mental list of all the friends she had made in the city as she walked south on Fifth Avenue. She remembered Stan's apartment, barely three blocks away, but she knew she couldn't go back there. She must go someplace where she wouldn't have to explain ... someplace where she wouldn't be reminded of the mess she had made of her life ... somewhere where she wouldn't be judged for the things she wasn't capable of doing...
The taxi screeched to a stop at the curb and Jo Ann threw herself into the back seat. Ignoring the driver's strange look at the sight of her, she gave him a downtown address and leaned back against the warm leather. Her body had started to shiver and for the first time since she had left Stan's apartment, Jo Ann was aware of the intense cold.
"May I trouble you for a cigarette?" She leaned forward and smiled as best she could despite the bruises on her face.
"Are you sure you're okay, Miss?" The driver sounded more frightened than concerned as he handed Jo Ann a pack of cigarettes.
"Yes ... I just slipped off the curb," Jo Ann lied, hoping he wouldn't press the issue.
The driver shrugged and headed west on Fifty-Seventh Street. Jo Ann sighed, grateful for his silence and ran her fingers through her rumpled hair.
As feeling returned to her flesh, Jo Ann felt the stiffness set in. By the time the driver pulled up at the corner of Waverly Place and Sixth Avenue, she wasn't sure if she'd be able to make it out of the cab.
"Wait here, will you please?" Jo Ann asked, turning back to the driver.
Seeing him nod, she glanced up to the third story window of a gray building and smiled at the sight of a small lamp that glowed in the window. Moving as quickly as she could, Jo Ann walked into the narrow lobby and searched the names on the register until she found the one she was looking for.
It seemed like hours before the buzzer answered her and Jo Ann pushed open the heavy brass door. Clenching her teeth against the pain in her knees, she climbed the flight of stairs and slumped against the apartment door at the top.
Bare footsteps padded across a wooden floor and hesitated for a moment on the other side of the door. "Who's there?" a sleepy voice asked.
"It's me ... Jo Ann. Open up, please."
The lock turned quickly and the door moved inward. Jo Ann stared at the girl in front of her for a long moment, before collapsing in tears against the doorframe.
"For heaven's sake, come on in." Laura encircled Jo Ann's waist with her bare arm and helped her inside. "What happened to you?"
"I've got a cab waiting downstairs," Jo Ann said. "Please pay him. I'll give you the money in the morning."
"Sure thing. You just wait right here," Laura said, helping Jo Ann into a chair, before she put a blouse on over her bra. "You sure you'll be able to stay alone while I go down?"
"Go ahead." Jo Ann accepted a handkerchief and dried her eyes. "I'll be all right, I promise."
Laura nodded dully and reached onto the record cabinet for her wallet. Without taking her eyes from Jo Ann, she slipped on a pair of loafers and walked slowly toward the front door. "Help yourself to a drink, if you'd like," she said, tucking her blouse into a pair of fitted black slacks. "I won't be but a minute."
"No thanks," Jo Ann murmured, but Laura was already out the door.
Tilting her head back against the rim of the wicker chair, Jo Ann forced herself to calm down and regain her composure. It was all right now, she told herself, lifting a trembling hand to wipe her eyes again. Everything was fine. Laura would take care of her. Laura wouldn't judge.
"That cab driver seems to be pretty shaken up about you," Laura said as she walked back into the apartment and locked the door behind her. "It took me a full five minutes to convince him that he didn't have to take you to a hospital."
"I guess I do look kind of strange." Jo Ann smiled despite herself at the sight of Laura trying to be tactful.
"Did you take a drink?" Laura looked around for the sight of a glass.
"I don't really need one. Thanks, anyway," Jo Ann said, knowing she'd never touch liquor again as long as she lived.
"You wanna tell me what happened?" Laura sat down cross-legged on the convertible sofa bed and pulled a pillow up beside her.
"Could I have some coffee first?" Jo Ann asked, unwilling to risk hysteria again.
"Of course." Laura jumped up off the bed and walked to a hot plate in the corner of the room. Shaking the aluminum coffee pot, she smiled at the sound of water inside it and turned on the burner. "I've only got instant, but it's not bad."
"That'll be fine," Jo Ann said and tried her best to look contented.
Laura stood fidgeting with her hands and staring at Jo Ann. Her hair was still tousled from where she had been lying on it and her eyes betrayed a great need for sleep. "You want to wash up before dinner?" she asked, affecting a light-hearted expression and pointing toward the bathroom.
Jo Ann nodded and walked across the room. Every movement was an effort, but she fought not to let it show. No point in upsetting her friend any more than necessary, she thought, wincing at the pain in her stomach.
With the bathroom door safely locked behind her, Jo Ann slipped off her shoes and steeled herself for a glance in the mirror. Turning slowly, she leaned forward and silenced a gasp with her shaky hand.
Her face was like a death mask, pale and tight about her high cheekbones. Jo Ann touched a deep red bruise on her forehead with tender fingers and felt the swelling there.
Cold water, that was the answer. Turning on the tap, she reached for a nearby washcloth and saturated it in the sink. Then she patted it, very gently, against her throbbing skin.
Jo Ann shifted her position several times to try to find a comfortable one in front of the sink. No use. Everything hurt. Everything ached. She felt torn to shreds.
Tossing the washcloth into the tub, she turned and unlocked the door. She hadn't even the energy to comb her hair.
The aroma of fresh coffee floated down the hall and brought inspiration. Sniffing the invigorating aroma, Jo Ann walked toward its source, eager to feel some warmth inside her.
"Not very pretty, am I?" Jo Ann found herself unable to meet Laura's eyes as she entered the living room. "I hope you're not upset."
"It's you I'm worried about." Laura pulled two heavy white mugs from the window sill and set them on a coffee table. "You look like you just wrestled with a Mack truck."
Jo Ann didn't even try for a clever retort. Instead, she sank down onto a folding chair and stared at the stream of water Laura was pouring into her cup.
"Cream and sugar?" Laura asked.
"Please." Jo Ann glanced over at the spoon and wondered if she had the energy to lift it.
The coffee was sweet and strong and Jo Ann tried not to drink too fast. She felt the heat scalding her cracked lips, but refused to give up. There had to be something that would make her stomach feel better, she told herself. It was worth any sacrifice, even pain, to rid herself of the nauseous sensation.
"If you're nauseous, then you shouldn't be drinking coffee," Laura said, sounding suddenly crisp and efficient. "Let me make you some hot soup."
"Please, don't go to any bother," Jo Ann smiled apologetically, feeling as helpless as a child.
Laura snorted and opened a cupboard. Pulling out a can, she opened it and dumped the contents into a pot of water and set it on the burner.
"Let me have a look at that cut," she said, sitting down in a chair next to Jo Ann's and tenderly brushing a wisp of hair out of the way. "I think we ought to put something on it."
"No, it'll be okay," Jo Ann protested weakly, unable to tolerate the thought of a burning antiseptic on top of the rest of her discomforts.
"Who asked you?" Laura smiled and hurried into the bathroom.
Jo Ann sat patiently while Laura cleaned the cut and applied a soothing white cream. The cool paste felt good on her forehead and she was glad Laura hadn't listened to her.
"Any place else?" Laura asked, when she had finished.
Jo Ann sighed and pulled her skirt up over her knees. The gritty brown earth stains soiled her flesh and made it look rough and chapped.
"I think you'd better lie down for that," Laura said, rising and walking toward the bed. "Come on, before it has a chance to make trouble."
Jo Ann walked obediently over to the bed and stretched out on her back. Despite the pain, she felt comfortable under Laura's care. It was good to have somebody minister to her ... somebody gentle, somebody who wouldn't pry. And even as her knees stung beneath Laura's touch, Jo Ann was glad she had come here.
"I don't think I'll be able to get all that dirt off without some hot water," Laura said, looking down and studying Jo Ann's soiled legs. "Come on, I'll run a hot tub for
"Please don't," Jo Ann said, stretching her legs out across the mattress. "I'll be fine if you'll just let me lie here for awhile."
"Fine and filthy." Laura pushed her chair back and stood up. "Now, give me your hand and stop being such a difficult patient."
Jo Ann sighed and pushed her legs over the side of the bed. Laura was too kind, she told herself. She didn't deserve such a good friend after the shabby way she had treated Laura that afternoon. She would be more careful in the future, Jo Ann added silently. People like Laura were few and far between.
The steam from the bathtub rose and thickened the air with moisture. Jo Ann squirmed at the sensation of damp clothing sticking to her skin as she watched the water rise in the tub. Beneath the front of her dress, her breasts complained with the need to be free of the scratchy, moist brassiere. Her spine felt like it was about to break. And that bath looked very inviting.
"I'll help you with that," Laura said when Jo Ann reached painfully around for the zipper on her dress.
Jo Ann stood silently as Laura loosened the material for her. Raising her arms straight above her head, she waited for Laura to hike the dress up and away.
Then she remembered. She wasn't wearing any panties ... they had been torn off and discarded. But it was too late. The dress was already up over her shoulders.
The expression on Laura's face was a combination of surprise and awareness. Jo Ann looked over at her furtively, then turned embarrassedly away.
"It's okay, Jo Ann. You don't have to explain." Laura's voice was soft, tender.
"It wasn't my fault..." Jo Ann heard herself start to explain.
"I'm sure it wasn't." Laura sounded sincere. "Come on now, let's get rid of the rest of your things."
Jo Ann stood still while Laura unhooked her brassiere. Naked finally, she stepped carefully over the rim of the tub and slowly lowered herself into the hot water.
The soothing warmth covered her body and lulled Jo Ann toward a state of calm. Still unable to look at Laura directly, she reached for a washcloth and soap.
"I'll do that," Laura said, taking the cloth out of Jo Ann's grasp and urging her to lean back against the smooth porcelain.
Jo Ann watched her tender breasts bob on top of the water. She could see a red welt that had risen next to one of her nipples and she hoped that Laura wouldn't notice it.
"Feel better?" Laura asked, patting a thick lather over Jo Ann's naked shoulder.
Jo Ann nodded and closed her eyes. How good it was to be catered to, she thought, as Laura's delicate touch tried to soothe away the pain. The washcloth lapped between her breasts and tickled a darkened point. Jo Ann felt the tip grow rigid beneath the water at the contact and blushed. Neither girl spoke for a long while.
"Okay, you're all clean and new," Laura announced, pulling the stopper and reaching beside her for a towel. "Dry off and I'll get you some pajamas."
"You don't have to do that," Jo Ann said. "I can make it back to my place all right. I'm sure I can."
"Nonsense." Laura brushed aside the last of Jo Ann's argument with a decisive wave of her hand. "You'll stay here. Unless, of course, my apartment isn't good enough for you."
"Don't be silly. I only meant that..."
"Then it's settled." Laura tossed Jo Ann a towel and left the room.
Jo Ann patted the last drops of water from her glistening body and hung the towel back onto the rack. Picking up the flannel pa jama top, she smiled at the bold blue stripes and slipped into it.
The draw string bottoms were too big on her and Jo Ann chuckled at their baggy fit. Finished at last, she pulled on Laura's extra pair of slippers and padded out into the other room.
"Well, there's one hell of an improvement." Laura put down her second cup of coffee and nodded approvingly at the smiling figure on the other side of the living room. "You ready for that soup now?"
Jo Ann went to the table and began to eat without a word. When her bowl was empty, she placed it in the sink and turned to Laura. "All gone," she said. "I'm a good girl, huh?"
"You bet your life you are." Laura winked and stood up. Walking over to the bed, she drew back the fresh sheets and patted the mattress. "Come on, now," she called to Jo Ann. "You can use a good night's sleep."
Obediently, Jo Ann crawled between the covers and rested her head happily on the softness of the pillow. Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as Laura began to undress.
The woman's back was to her and Jo Ann felt glad for the opportunity to observe Laura without being seen. She had somehow expected Laura to take off her clothes in the dark and the woman's lack of modesty surprised her.
A long, narrow back dove straight down to softly curving hips. Jo Ann stared at the sheer white panties and marveled at her friend's gorgeous figure. The old curiosity returned to mind as she noticed Laura's soft thighs and supple legs ... how come Laura had no dates?
Long graceful fingers reached up for the little clasps and unhooked the bra. Tossing it onto a nearby chair, Laura turned around quickly and smiled at Jo Ann. "All set?" she asked, reaching for a light switch.
Jo Ann quickly shifted her glance away from Laura's high, pointed breasts and nodded. "Don't you wear pajamas?" she asked as the room was plunged into darkness.
"Only at pajama parties." Laura's voice was tinged with amusement as she felt for the bed and crawled in.
The sound of the traffic out in the street caught Jo Ann's attention and held it, despite her tiredness. It was always the same in a strange bed, she remembered. Somehow, she never felt quite safe, without her old pillow and accustomed quilt. But where could she be safer, Jo Ann asked herself, wondering at the illogical workings of the human mind.
The second she closed her eyes, she saw him ... teeth flashing ... eyes glowing in the darkness. "Laura!" she cried out, grasping for the girl beside her.
"Hush, baby." Laura put an arm around Jo Ann's trembling shoulders and tenderly stroked her long hair. "It's all over now. You're safe."
Jo Ann took a deep breath and savored the pleasant, sweet odor of Laura's soft body. Suddenly, the warmth of Laura's closeness made her feel secure.
And soon, holding Laura tightly, Jo Ann fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.