Case History:
Cathy
"A symbolic manifestation of the sexual impulse, serious in adult life, may occur innocently, and not abnormally, in childhood. This is exhibitionism." (Ellis)
Freud refers to the exhilaration even very young children experience in nakedness; they love to dance about naked before going to bed, often raising their little garments, even before strangers, a reminiscence, as Freud views it, of a lost Paradisiacal state, to become later in exhibitionists a morbid obsession and often even normally reasserted after puberty in a definite though restrained form.
The exhibitionistic antics of the young are not considered serious. But when this urge continues to express itself in adulthood, it becomes a problem in our present society-a problem both to the authorities and to the person committing this so-called deviant act. Since exhibitionism is the most common sexual offense, accounting for about two-thirds of sex-offense arrests made, the courts are, at times, crowded with offenders. The persons involved, often highly respected individuals, are humiliated and, more-likely than not, lose their position in life.
The following case history is an ideal example of the growth of exhibitionistic urges in a young girl. The seed took root in a very young girl and finally bloomed into a full grown obsession within a young woman.
Since I have done a great deal of research and counseling with young adults and juveniles, I was quite interested when Cathy's parents consulted me and asked me to work with Cathy concerning her uncontrollable desire to expose herself. It seems she had been apprehended by the authorities, and they felt that any recommendations I might offer could, possibly, have some influence with their decisions.
Following, then, are verbatim excerpts, in Cathy's own words, from the many taped dialogues and personal notes taken during my many interviews with Cathy.
Cathy was a very attractive, bright, sixteen-year-old with golden-yellow hair flowing to her shoulders. Her large, sky-blue eyes had that exciting, "innocent female" wideness, and I am quite certain that her father could never refuse her anything she might ask him.
When she bounced into a room she commanded attention immediately. Her supple figure was perfectly developed.
We had an immediate rapport, and after a few preliminary questions and explanations, I asked her to start at the beginning and relate her first remembered sexual awakening. She hesitated to do this until I convinced her that everything she told me would be held in the strictest of confidence and would not be divulged to anyone.
"Well," Cathy said, "it's a little embarrassing Mr. De Armond, but I guess it's alright to tell you. Maybe you can help me.
"I remember when I was about eleven years old there was a boy at my school-I don't remember his name-that had some really wild pictures, and he showed them to a bunch of us kids. They were of men and women without any clothes on! I'd seen my mom a lot, and my dad a few times, but they weren't doing things together like the people in the pictures. The boys laughed at the pictures but we girls just giggled a little and blushed a lot.
"One picture showed a man standing naked, with his thing pointing out, you know, hard. I had never seen my dad like that. On the floor next to him was a naked girl with her legs all apart. Boy, you could see everything!
"Another one showed a man standing, and a woman was holding his penis in her hand, and I could see those things hanging down under his big thing! I had never seen a man's penis close up, only glimpses of my dad. I hardly ever saw my brother's little thing, and he was six years old.
"My girlfriend Barb and I were very interested in a man's penis and also a woman's sex parts, at that time.
"That weekend Barb spent the night at my house, and did we have fun! When she got there we went right to my room and locked the door. After we stopped giggling we started to talk about the pictures and things. She knew more than I did. She told me that a boy's thing could get stiff like that and that she had even seen her two brothers make theirs hard. They had even showed her one time and she played with their penises. She even suggested that I spend a night at her house and we might be able to peek on her brothers and see their things!
"I spent the night at her house, and her brothers were too much! Barb and I played records after I got there and she showed me a lot of her things, dolls and dresses and stuff. She had better things than I did. I guess her family had more money than we did.
"Anyway, we started to talk about boys, of course, and she showed me a little comic book she had. Said it was her older brother's. It showed men with their big things going into girls. I had heard about it but never saw it before.
"Looking at the book made me kind of itch around my pee hole. When Barb started telling me some of the things she'd seen her brothers do, she started to rub herself between her legs.
"I had done that before, and it always felt good, but I asked her what she was doing. She said, 'Making my pussy feel good. Didn't you ever do it?'
" 'Once in awhile,' I told her, 'but what do you mean by "pussy"? '
" 'Don't you really know?' she asked.
" 'No, really I don't,' I answered.
" 'I've got an idea,' she said excitedly, and then went over and locked her door.
"On the way back to the bed she continued, 'Let's take our clothes off and I can show you a few things, OK?'
"Before I could answer she started to pull her T-shirt over her head. I was beginning to get excited over the idea, so I followed suit.
"Barb didn't have full breasts, of course, but she sure had a good start in that department. Her nipples were bright rose-pink and stood straight out, like two rounded off pencil erasers. And, I found out later, just as hard. There was a ring-like discoloration at the base of each nipple. The breasts themselves were quite prominent little plum-size mounds.
"As small as her breasts were, I was a bit envious of her. My nipples were the same, just about, but I had a smaller rise of flesh under them. I had enough that you could grab a hold of, though.
" T like your breasts, Barb,' I said, a little embarrassed. T wish mine were like that.'
" 'They will be, Cathy. All of a sudden they'll be there, like mine were,' she said consolingly. T rub and play with mine-that's supposed to make them grow faster and bigger.'
"I decided then and there that I would have to start doing that to myself. I looked down at my little bumps, and when I looked up Barb was starting to roll her panties down her legs. I pulled off my shorts, and by the time I had my panties off she was rolling on the bed naked, giggling. I joined her, and we giggled together.
"After a while we had rolled on our sides, facing each other. I don't know who started it first, but we began to play with each other's breasts.
" 'Do you know what these are called?' she asked, laughing, as she rolled my nipples in her fingers.
"As I continued to caress her silky breasts I told her, 'No.'
" 'Well, they're called 'tits.' I guess I'll have to tell you everything.'
"With that, she put her finder down on my pee hole, and I jumped at the first touch of someone else's finger in that place, other than my own.
" 'This is what I was calling my pussy, and it feels real good if you rub it right,' she said.
"Suddenly she reached around me and slapped my rear. 'That,' she said with finality, 'is your ass! Now you know all the real names of everything.'
"We both laughed and then sort of moved together until we were touching each other, the whole length of our bodies. We put our arms around each other and started rubbing our titties together. A thrill traveled through my body each time our nipples sprang off of each other, like four small pieces of rubber tubing, and it felt so good! I commenced getting a sensation in my pussy area that I had never experienced in the past. I had the strongest desire to rub myself there!
"Barb must have had the same feeling, because she rolled onto her back, spread her legs wide, and started to do just that!
"I sat up and watched how she did it for a while, then dropped onto my back and imitated her actions.
"Pretty soon we were so heated up from fingering ourselves that our bodies were as red as two pretty cherubs. We were really going at it, making sucky little sounds with our fingers and enjoying every minute of it, when all of a sudden there was a loud laugh and a young male voice said, 'Wow, look what they're doin' now!'
"I almost peed on my finger as I sat bolt upright, and Barb was right with me. There, in the window in the wall facing the foot of the bed, were her two brothers! Their eyes were big as nickels, and after a brief period of silent staring, they climbed in the window.
"We were too surprised to move, and finally Barb said, 'What are you guys doing here?'
" 'We saw you girls come into the house so we thought we'd spy on you and see what you were up to,' the biggest boy said, smiling.
" 'Well, get out of here before I call Momma,' said Barb.
" 'If you do we'll tell her what you two were doin', ' said the oldest boy, still grinning.
"Barb shrugged her shoulders, looked at me, and said, 'These are my stupid brothers. That one is Joey,' she said pointing to the oldest. 'He's thirteen, and that one is Bud. He's twelve.'
"All this time Joey and Bud were staring at me between my legs, in fact at my whole body. I felt a strange sensation all over, as if their eyes were some sort of ray gun penetrating my flesh. I quickly put my hands over my pussy, in false modesty I guess, since I enjoyed their eyes looking at my secret places.
"They were a handsome pair, standing there in their short pants. Their partly matured, muscular bodies seemed to excite me-why, I didn't know.
"They stood there looking us all over for a while; then Joey said, 'Hey, you girls are sure getting your titties, they look pretty good.'
"I blushed at that, and, believe it or not, I could feel my nipples getting harder. I didn't know whether to cover my titties or keep my hand on my pussy, so I just kept my hands on my pussy.
"Barb didn't bother to cover herself at all; she just jumped off the bed and started pushing Joey toward the door. I noticed that she had a real cute butt, the way it clinched and wiggled as she moved. Each cheek was so round and protruding that they looked like two small balloons pushed together.
" 'You just get out of here, both of you!' she yelled, shoving them toward the door.
" 'Aw, come on, Barb, we're not hurting you. We like looking at you girls!'
"While Barb was trying to get them out, I slipped one of my fingers into my hole and started rubbing it in and out! My whole body was getting wildly excited, and I started to blush with passion! I could see the bulges in the boys' pants, between their legs, and I tried to imagine what their things must look like.
"Barb finally agreed to let the boys stay on the condition that they take their pants off. I kept my mouth shut, but inwardly I was so excited I could hardly contain myself.
"Barb got back on the bed with me, and we watched the boys. They pulled down their shorts in nothing flat. When Joey slipped his pants down, his thing just sprang out, all stiff and quivery. I was surprised at the size of his thing, for his age, and especially the large ball bag flopping back and forth every time he moved.
"The two naked boys stood there in front of us naked, with their hands on their hips like they were proud of their bodies and their hard dongs stiffly protruding from between their legs.
"As I devoured their rigid organs with my eyes, my finger penetrated too far into me, and I squealed a bit. They all looked at me, and Barb said, 'Come over to the bed so Cathy can look at you better. She's never seen a boy's thing before.'
"Both boys came to my side of the bed and stood there. Barb moved behind me to watch. I could feel her hot little body on my back. My point of interest wasn't two feet away, and I really scrutinized it. I thought the color and shape of his thing was beautiful. It was about five inches long with an oblong cap on top that reminded me of a small boy with his winter stocking cap pulled down over his head. The body of it was the color of pure cream, and the top was a little darker. I had never seen the tiny mouth on the end of one before. It reminded me of a fish's mouth. I could distinctly see the two balls hanging inside his sac, and that sac was curiously wrinkled. This strange, new, pulsating, pretty thing hypnotized me; I couldn't take my eyes from it.
"Suddenly Joey spoke. 'Would you like to touch it, Cathy?'
"As though moving by its own power my hand reached and grasped it. How can I possibly describe the feel of it! On first contact my hand jumped as if from an electrical shock. I quickly grabbed the hot thing again, and I could feel it throbbing and pulsing. It was hard and yet soft to the touch, like corn silk.
The skin was sort of loose, and I discovered I could move it up and down. This gave Joey quite a thrill.
"I had been so engrossed with my new toy that I didn't notice the others until I felt probing fingers on my pussy and more on my nipples. Glancing down, I saw Bud's head between my legs, his hand feeling me. The sight of a boy's head so close to my pussy excited me so much I squeezed the thing in my hand. This made Joey jump and holler, 'Hey, not so hard!'
"Barb released my nipples and said, 'Get on the bed, you guys,' and they did. It seems she had become the director, and the actors complied.
"The first thing Joey did was to rub the palm of his hand over my nipples, pushing them over and then letting them spring back up. The feeling was fantastic. He moved down and told me to open my legs. I pulled my feet up flat on the bed and he could really see my hole. He reached out with both hands and spread the lips, the outer ones, apart, and I could feel his breath on my inner sex lips.
" 'Man, you sure got a good-lookin' cunt, Cathy,' he said in a low voice. 'I'd sure like to put my prick in it!'
"Two new words! It didn't take me long to define them, though, and when I did, I felt quivery inside at the thought of what he had said.
" 'Have you ever done that to a girl?' asked Barb.
"He told us that he had done it several times with a young neighbor woman and that he really knew how to do it. Barb then suggested that he and I do it, that she had never seen it before. She had nothing on me, because I hadn't either. Joey had been rubbing me in the clitoris area, and I was ready for anything at this point.
"He raised up and pushed my knees back toward my shoulders, making my cunt push up even with the cheeks of my ass. He then climbed between my legs, lowered himself, and started to rub his prick across my wide-open, moist cunt. While watching this, Barb was unconsciously rubbing and pinching my nipples until I thought they would pop right off of me. Bud was on the other side of us playing with himself.
"My cunt was so wide open he had little difficulty starting his big prince into it. His penetration stopped abruptly when his organ hit something that surprised the both of us, and it hurt a little. He was too far gone, however, to stop, and he just pushed harder. Suddenly something gave way, causing a sharp pain inside me. I jumped and uttered a surprised cry of pain, and he pulled back quickly, until only the head of his organ was in me. He started short little probing movements, and I could feel the head of his prick rubbing back and forth on my clitoris. The pain subsided and when he noticed I no longer appeared to hurt, he entered into me deeper and deeper with each swelling thrust of his thick muscle. My butt quivered as I felt the entire length of his prick squeeze across my clitoris.
"I felt an unusual sensation as my insides became accustomed to this strange thing jamming into me. My knees were pressed against my shoulders from his weight on top of me, and his ball bag was slapping against my ass. I could feel the swelling head of his prick driving further and further into my hole. He started ramming it in faster and faster. His muscles started to tighten, and suddenly his whole body became rigid and he made one great thrust into me, and suddenly I felt something of great force start to pump into me. Each spurt made me gasp in pleasure. His prick felt twice the original size, and pretty soon I could feel a hot liquid start to trickle down the valley between the cheeks of my butt.
"I had learned the meaning of another word-'fuck'!
"That day was an experience I will never forget as long as I live. Bud fucked Barb, while Joey and I watched, and after that I went home.
"Fucking Joey was fun, but I thought at the time that there must be something more to it than what I felt, because I was still feeling hot when I left Barb's house. I figured that I'd find out someday, and boy, I sure did.
"About a week later I went over to Barb's house again. This time I met her father. Wow, he sure was a handsome man! Anyway, when he answered the door he told me that Barb had gone to the store, and her brothers were also gone.
"I should tell you that Barb's mother had been killed in an accident about two years prior to that time, and her dad was raising them by himself.
"Well, he asked me in and suggested I sit on the couch and talk with him until Barb got back. I was wearing a microskirt and regular panties, you know, not those pantyhose things, and I was a little embarrassed when I sat down in front of that gorgeous, mature man, because it pulls up to my hips whenever I sit down. I noticed that his eyes were glued to my legs as I sat there, and I began to get the same feeling I got when Barb's brothers were looking at me!
"I asked him where the brothers were, and he told me that they had gone on a camping trip for a few days. His dark brown eyes were still staring at my crotch and legs, and I began to feel my nipples start to rise.
"I had played with myself after that first fabulous day in this house, and all I really thought about while doing it was the interest the boys had shown in my body, how their looking had given me such a strange, interesting feeling. Now I was experiencing that feeling again.
"I shifted, so that more of my legs were bared, and Brad-that was his first name, the name I used later-didn't miss a thing. I could feel the moisture permeating my panties as he stared at me, wide-eyed!
"While he was looking at the sights in front of him, we talked about school and homework. His eyes were drawing the moisture from my pussy and lifting my nipples to him as if to a magnet. Every once in a while he would unconsciously caress himself between his legs. I knew what the bulge in his crotch was, and I could imagine what it looked like. It was very exciting to me to know that I was having such an effect on a mature man.
"As we talked on, I could feel my pussy lips opening and still more moisture gathering there. My legs spread apart as if my pussy lips were pushing them open.
"He could see my panties easy enough, but suddenly I got the strangest compulsion. Just thinking about it made me hotter than ever. I had the desire to show him more than my panties!
"I knew I shouldn't do anything obvious, but for some reason I just couldn't control this urge. I finally excused myself and went to the bathroom. Once there I reached under my tiny skirt and pulled my panties off. After compulsively rubbing my sex a few seconds, I put my panties in my purse and went back to the living room.
"Brad was still sitting, facing the couch. I didn't try to hide anything when I sat down, and the sensual thrill I got when he saw my naked cunt was terrific! His eyes popped open as big as silver dollars. Again I felt on the brink of something big, like I experienced when Joey fucked me.
"Brad started to blush profusely when he glanced between my thighs and realized I was bare. He quickly turned his head away in embarrassment, but he couldn't stop his periodic crotch rubbing!
"I knew the effect I was having on him and I wanted more. I told him how much I liked Barb and her brothers, and he thanked me but didn't look at me. Then I mentioned that I had fixed my hair differently and asked him how he liked it. This time he had to face me! When he did, his eyes automatically dropped to my pussy, and he really looked shocked. I had propped one leg halfway up on the seat of the couch, and that sort of opened everything wide. His skin was crimson, and he was actually breathing hard.
"Just as I was thinking about what to do next, Barb came in the door. I dropped my leg down and pulled down my skirt the best I could. Brad jumped up, told me my hair looked nice, excused himself, and left the room. When he stood up I could see how big his organ must be from the rise in his crotch.
"Barb said 'Hi, be right back,' and went to her room.
"My hand dropped immediately to my pink sex lips and I started rubbing them rapidly, especially the little knob at the top. It felt so good I even pushed my finger into my hole. In a few moments I experienced one of the most glorious, twitching, jerking, convulsive feelings I have ever had. It was as if I was in the throes of a seizure. I had reached my first orgasm!
"I was still in a half faint when Barb returned to the room, and she asked if I was ill. I told her yes and left her house immediately. I knew then what it was that I had been missing. I vowed I was going to do it again, in bed that night, and I did!"
I shall interrupt Cathy's narrative, at this point, to say that this was one of the critical phases in Cathy's sexual development. It is quite obvious that her sex education was limited. Had she been tutored on the aspects of male and female genitalia and sex drives, her direction would possibly have been on a more normal plane. As it happened, her first realization that she could stimulate the opposite sex by exposing her genitalia became imbedded in her libido-particularly since she experienced her first orgasm under these circumstances and related this to the incident with Barb's father. Her future sex patterns were being molded at this time. The die was cast, so to speak. In fact, according to her, she did masturbate in bed that evening and many evenings thereafter, visualizing the above incident. She had reached the conclusion that if she were to continue to experience this enjoyable, satisfying happening it must come about in the same way-by her exposing herself. So begins the growth of Cathy's sexual dilemma.
As generally happens in cases of this nature, Cathy began to masturbate excessively. The incident with Barb's father began to wear out as a masturbatory vision, so she had to search for more "food" for her insatiable hunger.
She decided to expand her activities to the boys at school, and at this point we continue with her story.
"Like I told you, I decided to show myself to the boys at school, and boy-did I ever!
"This particular day I wore a regular miniskirt, not a micro, and put my panties in my clutch bag. On the way to school I actually got hot and bothered thinking about my adventure.
"While I sat on the bench, waiting for the school bus, I spread my legs slightly. You should have seen the men in the passing cars look at me! I'll bet I made all their things get hard! One man even went through a red light because he was looking up my dress!
"The first thing I did when I got to school was to get my books from my locker. It's a lower locker, so I have to squat down to get into it. In the past I would usually face the locker and keep my knees together, but that day I faced toward the hallway and spread my legs just enough so that if anyone looked they could see right up my hole and butt! Quite a few guys did just that!
"The classroom was the best fun, though. The boys used to drop pencils and things, and when they picked them up they'd try to look up some girl's dress, and they were usually successful. With miniskirts it's not difficult; You should have seen their faces when they looked up my legs and saw that I didn't have panties on-that was really something!
"Two boys in front of my desk dropped so many things that the teacher noticed it. We had a male teacher, and he wasn't so dumb! He knew what they were doing. After that, he sat where he could see a little bit himself. That turned me on more than the boys looking at me, and I really gave him a view! It was like a new world to me, I'd found a new world of excitement!
"After that I hardly ever wore any panties. It was too much fun to show myself to the boys, and especially to men! On my fourteenth birthday our school had a big baseball game. I decided I would be able to show myself to a lot of guys, so I decided to go. It was really going to be something! I played with myself for hours, just thinking about it!"
Cathy had described some of her masturbatory techniques to me and it is amazing how sophisticated Cathy had become, in a few short years. Following is an excerpt from a session describing some of her actions.
She told me that she used to write in her diary while naked, and she showed me a few pages she had written when she had turned fourteen.
"I'm sitting here with you naked, sweet diary, so forgive me if I stop and rub my cunt every once in a while. I have the nicest bunch of hair between my legs, it's fun to play with. I was looking at myself in the mirror today and wow-have I developed lately! My titties are really getting big. I love to rub and caress them with my hands, 'specially when I'm fingering my hole. The other night I discovered another hole for fun. Accidentally, I sat on my hair brush. I was naked at the time, and the handle went between my butt cheeks and right to my back hole. It felt good so I pressed the handle into my hole. I can't tell you, diary, what a feeling I had. My tittie nipples erected instantly, and I could feel the dampness start in my cunthole. I started pumping it in and out, and it bothered me so much that I started my finger into my hole. After a while I began to wonder what it would feel like in my front hole. My hand started moving like it wasn't even part of me. In and out, in and out, faster and faster. I had a come real fast. I'm going to find something better, more like a boy's prick, to try later."
She informed me that she would masturbate endlessly thinking about her past and future exhibitionistic exploits.
Now to continue with Cathy's description of her "production" at the ballpark.
"Well, I want to tell you, I really had fun! Sitting in the bleachers I could show myself off real good. Of course I wore a miniskirt, and when I saw a boy or man looking my way I would spread my legs, and I could even feel a breeze on the lips of my sex when I did it! One man, he was very handsome, I thought, looked at me more than the game!
"I acted as if I was watching the game, but I could see him out of the corner of my eye. There were two boys, about fourteen, that liked my show too. I could tell because they started to rub themselves between their legs. I got a big kick out of two other boys, about eight years old, that were sitting right in front of me. They kept turning around and looking right up my ass and giggling. It must have been quite an education for them!
"The whole thing excited me so much I had to go to the restroom and finger myself. I was sorry I went, because when I got back, the game was over. I had planned to meet the handsome man after the game, but when I got back he was already gone. I had a strong desire to have a mature man play with me.
"The next weekend I went over to Barb's house. She wasn't there, but her father was! He'd been looking at me strangely lately, like he would like to do something with me, sexually.
"What a time I had! Her father had been drinking; in fact, he answered the door with a drink in his hand. He invited me in, and I sat on the couch facing him in his chair. He started telling me that he had been thinking about his late wife and that he was very lonesome for her. While he talked I let my legs separate just enough to barely show my sex lips and hair. He caught the view quick enough, and he didn't hide his interest as he had done the last time. He just openly stared at my crotch!
"I was quickly becoming aroused and opened my legs a bit more. He was getting that beautiful bulge in his crotch, too! I finally changed the conversation by asking him if he had any girlfriends. He told me not really, just a few he knew. He was drinking continually, and everything seemed perfect for my plan.
"It really jolted him when I raised the calf of my leg onto the couch cushion. He almost dropped his drink. I could feel my cunt lips separate when I moved, so I know he had a real eyeful.
"He started to rub himself between his legs, and I knew why, but I asked him what he was doing that for. This surprised him and he stopped immediately, picked up his drink, took a long swig, and, with slurred speech, asked me what I meant.
" 'Why are you rubbing yourself between your legs like that?' I asked innocently.
"He didn't answer me immediately but swallowed his drink and got up and fixed himself another. I could really guess the size of his thing, it was sure pushing out the front of his pants! I couldn't resist rubbing my swollen sex lips while he was facing the other way, thinking about the cause of that bulge!
"He was pretty unsteady on his feet when he came back, and he staggered to his chair. He looked between my legs and then looked me right in the eye.
" 'Because you're driving me nuts, the way you sit there. I can see everything you have between your legs. It isn't proper for a girl of your age to sit in front of a man like that. You cause things to happen to him.'
"I thought, Boy, don't I know it! and then I answered, 'You don't seem to mind looking, Brad.' It was the first time I had called him by his first name, and I could tell it surprised him.
"He shook his head and then mumbled, 'You're as bad as Barb.'
"I wondered what he meant by that, but I let it pass. I could tell he was really getting drunk, and when I put my foot up on the couch he just emptied his glass in one gulp.
"I could see he was stoned by this time, and I went over and sat on his lap. I could feel his hard penis under my butt, so I squirmed around on it for a while. He was too far gone from the drinking and sex stimulation to make me get up. He just sat there with his eyes half-shut, breathing hard.
" 'I'll bet you have a big one, Brad,' I said, feeling his strength throbbing between the cheeks of my ass.
"I could hardly hear his answer, I think he asked me, "A big what?' I told him I meant his thing, but he just moaned, closed his eyes, and passed out.
"I got off his lap and felt the hill in his pants. Gosh, it seemed so solid and large! I quickly unzipped his pants and put my trembling hand inside. I had a little trouble getting into his undershorts but I finally did, and his hot flesh jumped as my cool fingers curled around the thick shaft and moved up the smooth, silky skin. It was so large my fingers would not meet around it, and I tugged at it as I tried to free it from his pants. Finally I took out my hand and unbuttoned his pants and underwear and pulled them down. His huge prick sprang out, a thick, strongly curved spear of flesh, topped by a large round head shaped like a big ripe plum. His balls hung heavy in his wrinkled bag, as large as walnuts under the black fur of his crotch. I cupped my hand under them and held their warm weight. My first encounter with a full-grown prick and balls!
"I became fascinated by the beauty of his organ and sat on the floor in front of him to enjoy the sight. As I watched, his cock pulsated and throbbed, and his balls started pulling up to his shaft. I reached out my hand and ran my fingers up and down the engorged prick gently as I marveled at the slightly dark red color of this handsome tool.
"All of a sudden I began to get an urge I had never experienced before. I had seen pictures of it but I had never tried it before. I'm sort of ashamed to tell you this, but I wanted to put his hot thing in my mouth! There was that enormous, bobbing prick in front of me, jerking hot and glistening with moisture on the head, and I wanted to put my mouth on it! Why, I'll never know. Maybe it was because it was a real man's cock, I don't know.
"I took his hard shaft in my hand and moved my face up over his straining prick and lowered my mouth until my warm, soft lips captured the smooth, pulsing head. I swirled my tongue rapidly around it and mouthed it with my lips until it was swollen and gleaming from the loving polish that I applied to it.
"The saliva ran from the sides of my mouth as I sucked hungrily at the head-my cheeks pulling in from the force of each suck-and then I lowered my face on it and engulfed most of the throbbing, thick length within my mouth as I ran it down my throat. My lips were a tight O around the shaft as I sucked it in and out, and I tried to keep a tight tunnel around his entire cock as I slurped greedily, my head bobbing up and down as I nursed it.
"To my amazement, I felt a hot climax building in me as I sucked, and when I felt the thick load of his sperm spurting into the back of my throat, I began to come wildly, myself. I moaned and thrashed on the floor in front of him, my fingers pumping in and out of my cunt, all the while keeping his spitting prick deep within my mouth as I quaked with the violence of my own orgasm.
"Lustfully, I gulped at the heavy streams of sperm that he shot down my throat, and each spurt of his delicious discharge caused my clinching cunt to spasm in unison. I lovingly sucked him dry, swallowing every delicious drop before letting his wet prick drop from my lips. I moved back, wiping off my mouth with my hand, and looked at his darling cock hanging halfway limp between his thighs. I was fascinated watching his balls relax and roll down from their tight condition to their normal hanging position.
"For some reason I had an intense guilty feeling and wanted to get away from there as quickly as possible. I stuffed his soft but still large penis into his pants and gently lifted his bag of balls, dropped them in, and closed his pants. Then I jumped up and ran out of the house and home. Brad didn't wake up during the whole scene. He was just sort of groaning and rubbing himself as I went out the door. The minute I got home I went to bed and to sleep."
We break from the narration at this point to discuss the growth of Cathy's sexual aberration.
As it can readily be seen, Cathy learned at an early age that she could arouse the sexual desires of males, young and old, by exposing her genitalia. This thrilled her, and it soon became a game with her. She would always try to see the reaction she caused between the males' legs, and she was always thrilled to see the hump their erected penises made against their clothing, an erection that she had created. When it was not apparent or she was unable to determine if they had erections, she knew a quick feeling of despondency. It became such an obsession with her that she would visualize her encounters while she masturbated.
Masturbation had become a major function of Cathy's life. She continually devised new approaches to gain her now violent orgasms. She used all of the traditional implements, such as hairbrushes, hot dogs, condoms filled with various items, and even an artificial penis a friend of hers had acquired. Her most accomplished masturbatory technique is related in the following segments of our interviews.
Cathy continued to exhibit herself in the usual ways, and by the time she was sixteen years old, she was wiser and more experienced.
Cathy met a new friend shortly after her sixteenth birthday. I asked her to describe her friendship with this girl, Marta, and her relationship with her.
"Well, I really liked Marta. She knew a lot about sex and wasn't afraid to talk about it. I stayed at her house a lot of nights, but this one weekend her family went away for the whole weekend, and wow!
"We had gone up to her bedroom to put our suits on to go swimming. When we went into her room I saw a peculiar-looking rubber thing lying on her bed. She grabbed it and tried to hide it, but I stopped her. I kept asking her what it was but she wouldn't tell me. Finally I argued with her long enough and she told me it was a 'dildo.' Of course, I asked her what the hell that was. I was getting the idea, though, because the thing looked just like a man's penis. She explained that it was an 'auto-stimulator.' I said, 'Come on, you couldn't start a car with that thing!' We both laughed, and that relaxed the tension a great deal.
"After begging her to show me how it worked she finally agreed and let me hold it. It sure looked like the real thing. It had the veins running down the shaft, a cute ring of flesh-like plastic under the head, just like a real one with a hard-on, and it even had a ball bag hanging down.
"She said she would demonstrate it to me if I agreed to let her do it to me. I figured if it didn't hurt her it couldn't hurt me, so I agreed.
"Marta went into the bathroom to get undressed, and I picked the thing up to inspect it again. It even felt like a real male organ. It was about seven inches long and about an inch and a half in diameter, and it had a perfect little puckered mouth in the head of it, pretty much like a true prick.
"Well, anyway, she fucked herself with it, and I helped, and then she fucked me with it. It was a lot of sex fun, but not at all like an honest-to-goodness, real, live, hot, throbbing, blood-filled male prick!
"I was always finding different ways to get a come. The trouble is, when I try these things, after I start getting hot I want to show myself to males! It doesn't matter what their age is, as long as they have a prick. Why can't I get rid of this urge? I try to control myself, but to no avail. I knew if I kept up those practices I'd get into trouble.
"Anyway, one night while I was taking a bath I discovered something new. I like to get into the tub while the water is still running, and after I'm in the tub I slide down, ass first, to the faucet, pull my legs to my shoulders, which makes my pussy protrude out between my legs, and let the hot, fast-running water gush over my pussy lips. I can't tell you how good it feels, but it's something like a wet, slippery prick rubbing across my sex, and it feels so fluid and forceful.
"Well, I was doing my 'hydrotherapy' one night and I heard voices, or mumblings. I sat up, even thought I was hotter than hell, and realized that the voices were coming from the apartment next door. Now, the two apartment houses are situated so that the one next door to me is higher. The first floor is actually above our apartment, and you can look into our bathroom window and see the whole thing. I guess it's because they have underground parking next door. Anyway, I heard these voices, and since I had the sliding window open I sort of halfway stood up and peeked over the window sill.
"At first, all I saw was what appeared to be a bare back. It was going up and down, and once, it went high enough for me to see that it was a young man. He finally lifted himself on his arms, but his body kept vibrating. Then the realization hit me that he was in the act of making sex!
"As hot as I was already, this was all I needed to go all the way. I realized that if I stood, outside the tub, in the middle of the bathroom, I would present a perfect picture to someone in that window. I jumped out of the tub immediately!
"Since my light was on I knew I was in full view. I stood facing the mirror and started to inspect my ripe body. Turning this way and that so that I exposed all of myself to the window. I could hear the grunting and groaning going on next door, and I was so hot I had to force myself not to finish. If I had rouched my pussy then, I would have orgasmed immediately.
"Quite naturally, the guy next door was so engrossed in his sex making that he didn't see me, so I slammed the bathroom door shut, bang! This got his attention, and with a startled look on his face, his head jerked toward my window. I had started to finger myself by that time, and I could see him staring at me, out of the corner of my eye. I turned, facing away from the window, so he could see my lush ass cheeks; then I bent over, as if to pick something from the floor. I knew that in this position he could see pussy lips, ass-hole, and all. That's the beauty of a woman's body, she can bend over like that and throw all of her sex out her ass. I have little hair, so I know he had an unobstructive view.
"Knowing that his prick was in a cunt, driving away, gave me an exceptionally wild thrill. I could even imagine I could feel his prick in my own hole as I pumped away with my finger. With my free hand I started rubbing my tits, and squeezing them, in rhythm with the finger in my cunt.
"Keeping my head facing toward the mirror, I shifted my eyes toward the window and I could see the sexed up male, staring right at me. He started pumping faster and faster, and jamming my finger in all the way, I think I had my orgasm with him, because I could hear the sighs and moans of his climax, as I reached the summit of sex with a great burst of sexual satisfaction.
"He dropped from view then, and I started to clean myself up. I glanced at the window after a little while, just in time to see the young man get up. He was in his early twenties, and he didn't even look toward me. Then I saw the other person start rising. The first thing I saw was an ass lifting up! Then the whole body lifted up, and you won't believe what I'm going to tell you. The other person, lifting up from his stomach, was another guy! I could see his prick and balls! He glanced at my window, saw me, and grabbed his dick and waved it at me. I was totally disgusted, so I dried and went right to bed."
Cathy was gradually losing the normal desire for sexual relations with a male, owing to her abnormal obsession to exhibit her body and the sexual satisfaction she gained by doing so, and also owing to her more sophisticated techniques of masturbation. Her most unusual masturbatory practice, one she continued for quite some time, was initiated by an older girl friend of hers. The girl had purchased an extremely unique, and interesting item through the mail.
The paraphernalia was quite exceptional and expensive. Basically it was a pair of rubber pants, fitting skin tight from the waist down to just above the knees. Except for the length, it was much the same as skin divers wear. However, the distinctive feature of this garment was that inside, at crotch area, there was a solid extension, about six inches long and one inch in diameter, that extended from the front of the pants inward. When a female dons the garment the protruding member inside goes into the wearer's vagina. It does this quite readily, and the girl can have a dildo inserted in herself as long as she wears the garment. A pair of slacks or bell bottoms will never reveal the secret. Most any movement will produce an extremely satisfying experience, throughout the day, for the wearer. Cathy procured one of these devices and wore it a great part of the time-unless she wanted to exhibit herself, of course.
Cathy's exhibitionistic career was untainted until she devised an unusual activity for the boys in her neighborhood. She would arrange to have ten or twelve boys come to her house on certain days of the week, when her parents were not home, to enjoy a show. The show consisted of a cast of one-Cathy.
On the designated day, Cathy would seat the boys around the living room in a circle and then go into her act. First she would put a sexy record on the player, things like Cleopatra or El Cid; then she would start her dance. She'd twirl and spin, trying to be as sexy as she knew how. Knowing her, I would imagine she was quite successful. After a while she would slowly unbutton her blouse and gradually pull it off one arm and then the other. When it was completely off she would caress various parts of her body with it and then drop it to the floor. I asked her if she had ever witnessed this type of dance before, and she maintains that she never had. It seems she was a born sex provocateur. I shall continue her story in her own words, as derived from the tape.
The next part really turned me on, because the boys sure got interested. They would sit on the edge of their seats in great expectation, because this is the part where I start to take off my hip huggers. After I unbuttoned them I slowly started slipping them down my body. If there happened to be some boys in the crowd that hadn't seen a naked girl, they really got excited. Most of the boys started to rub their things at this point, and I could see their hard-ons bulging.
"When I dropped my pants to the floor, I started rubbing my body all over. Then I unhooked my bra and let it hang loose, and when I moved, my titties bounced out and they got a quick look at them. I loved to reach under the bra and caress my tits. This always made me real bothered, and the boys too! Finally I let my bra fall off my arms and gave them a good look. About this time the ones that had been there before unzipped and pulled out their peters. My mouth always watered when I saw all the different sizes and shapes of the pricks, all standing up stiff, because I knew I had caused it and that before it was over with I was going to play with each and every one of them!
"Then I danced around in my little lace panties, titties bouncing, and I even did the bumps, turning to face each side of the room to give them all a good look.
"About this time, I'd had about two or three orgasms. Most of the boys were jacking off, and it was really hard for me to keep going. Then it was time for my announcement. I stood in the middle of the room and said, 'OK, I'm going to pick two boys to pull down my panties.' Boy, did that ever start a turmoil. They all started fighting to see who was going to be lucky. I just looked around, and if there are some first timers there, that's who I choose, but usually I pick the two with the biggest cocks."
(Notice that Cathy has lapsed into the present tense, reliving the experiences. She often does this, although the events are long past.)
"After I pick the boys I have one stand on each side of me, and usually I reach down and give their sweet, springy cocks a squeeze, and this always gives me another orgasm. They each grab the elastic of my panties and slowly start rolling them down to the floor.
"The murmurs and groans from this sight come from all over the room, and the jacking off is a wild frenzy. After the panties roll off my pouting lips and curly hair, the cocks of my two helpers start to jerk up and down and they usually end up sitting on the floor, in front of me, jacking off.
"Then I kick the panties away and start to dance again, only this time I move so that my cunt lips and ass are opened for all of them to view. Seeing them all looking at my box I slither to the floor and roll and squirm with another come. When that's over I spread my legs and start fingering myself. This always amazes the boys, and they crowd around me to see better. When I roll onto my belly they always spread my ass cheeks apart and look at my anus puckering away. Once, one of them stuck his cock in my ass, and it felt lovely.
"When I turn over on my back the wisest boys ask me to let them stick their darling pricks into my cunt. I pick one, and pretty soon they all have turns at my pussy...."
Cathy conducted this show for several weeks, until one young lad, eight years old, told his older brother. His brother wanted to go with him, but the youngster refused to tell him or where the shows took place. In anger the older boy told their parents, who reported it to the police, who caught Cathy in the act at her next show. She was taken into custody by the juvenile authorities and subsequently released to her parents pending further court proceedings.
We have, in the case of Cathy, a classic example of what is happening in our society today. The lack of intelligent sex education creates, in the young child, an unhealthy curiosity about sex. If during the child's investigation into the mysteries of sex he inadvertently experiences a certain satisfaction while performing a certain act, this becomes the sexual goal of the participant. This would be eventually termed an obsession or a fetish. If an object is involved it is considered a fetish, whereas if a situation or certain type of person is the aberration, it would, more or less, be considered an obsession.
I am reminded of an extremely unusual case that defies classification. The subject, at an early age, was, normally, fascinated by the simple act of blowing on a window glass and watching the moisture of his breath evaporate. On a certain occasion, while doing this, he happened to see a couple in the throes of a wild sexual act. He witnessed this identical scene several times within a few days. Being at the age of puberty, he experienced his first orgasm while watching this sexual performance as the moisture from his breath evaporated on the cold glass of his window. This obsession became so great that he would merely blow his breath on a window glass several times to achieve a very satisfying orgasm.
I cite this case only to indicate how strongly these innocent happenings in early life can affect the sexual personality of the sexually uninformed. It is interesting to note that there is not a case on record, to this writer's knowledge, of a person becoming involved with the authorities in a deviant sexual matter, if that person has a nudist background. Whether this is indicative of any premise is, at the most, unproved. It does indicate that where there is a lack of curiosity there is a lack of aggressive sexual tendencies.
Cathy was extremely aggressive in her sexual pursuits, and her deviation, or obsession, became the almighty as far as her sexual satisfaction was concerned. With proper psychological indoctrination and therapy, it is felt that Cathy's problem will be alleviated in due time.