Chapter 6
"How was it?" Jimmy Blackburn grinned over his coffee cup. He watched Ben unpack his duffle bag and waited for the details; he had been waiting expectantly since Ben had left to hear the story of Ben's orgy in San Francisco.
"The usual...." Ben smiled, knowing that Jimmy was always hanging onto every word. He knew that he supplied Jimmy with a great deal of fantasy. Jimmy was a full-blooded Cherokee and because of that, he wasn't paricularly inclined to the social scene in Seaside. He was a lonely man, one who wandered aimlessly through the woods around Seaside when he was off duty. Ben Grant had never worked with a more trustworthy or able man, and he respected the fact that Jimmy used his sexual realities, failings or victories, as an insight into what the 'normal' people of Seaside went through. '
"Well?" Jimmy asked, lighting a cigarette.
"I did everything a man could in a city like that...." Began Ben, sitting down across from his man and lighting a cigar. Jimmy knew that when Ben lit a cigar he would be preparing himself for a long session; a story that would probably last long into the night.
Ben told Jimmy about everything he had done. He was grateful to be able to sort out his experiences with someone, to get some kind of reaction to his adventures. It had been a long time since Ben had felt so shaken, so disjointed by an experience. All that he did in the city had seemed to leave him empty. He did not feel fulfilled nor satisfied by his 'time.' He told Jimmy this and was very truthful.
"Sounds like a weird place, Ben ... the cities are getting strange." Jimmy was always a prophet of doom. He had studied his ancestors' religion and edicts and had surmised that white man's society was doomed. He had said more than once that the 'white man did not respect the Earth, that they floated above it and would kick the ground out from beneath them.' Ben had thought at first that he was joking. But as time wore on, and Ben was able to adjudge the perspective which Jimmy held, he realized that the young man was very serious.
Jimmy continued after Ben had told him all. "In the cities, they can buy anything. Because of that, everything loses its value and now nothing remains as a prize. There is no more up or down, just a level sense of pleasure. But most of your people are not prepared to handle that pleasure. You were not prepared, were you?"
"It wasn't the pleasure that got to me," replied Ben, sifting Jimmy's words through his mind, "it was the damn money, I mean, the business-like thing. It was like going to a market and buying a head of lettuce."
"Of course," smiled Jimmy, seeing a relationship which he had not considered before, "the white man has enslaved everyone in the past and has set his slaves free. Now, there are no more people to be enslaved so he must enslave himself."
It was getting a little too heavy for Ben. He could never keep up with Jimmy when he began. He got up from his chair and began stalking back and forth across the station floor.
In the corner where the coat rack was, lay the gas can which had been found at the sight of the Browning fire. That had been months in the past, had occurred on Saturday night somewhere in the distant land by the sea. Ben remembered the night well. His saving of the boy, his lovemaking with Elaine ... that had all seemed so long ago. Yet, the feeling which began to plague him then still remained. It seemed that no matter where he went or what he did that same, importent feeling still raged through him. He had lost his focus of the problem, of his ability to eliminate the feeling from his own spirit. Now, as he gazed down at the red can, the focus returned.
"Still no trace?" He asked quietly, almost to himself.
"That was a long time ago, Ben. We haven't had a major blaze since ... I'm sure whoever did it was just a crank operator. Probably moved on to another town by now."
Ben picked up the can and fondled it. He could not define the feeling he had as he touched the cool metal. But there was something about it that told him of it's place within his life. There was some connection between the can and what bothered him. He decided that he would take the metal container home with him.
"What the Hell you want that for, anyway?" Jimmy chided as Ben started out the door with the can under his arm.
"Not sure, Jimmy. I guess it just interests me."
Jimmy laughed. His laughter was catching and soon Ben was laughing. "Frisco must have been a real winner for you!"
Ben jabbed at Jimmy. The Indian backed away, crouched as though holding a tomahawk and swung for Ben's scalp. "Warrior no have reservation ... want white man's land now!!!"
Ben laughed some more. It felt good to be laughing-like this with Jimmy. They had not been this loose with each other for a long time. "Injun speak with fucked tongue!"
Jimmy did a war yell and began dancing around Ben. Soon, he was giving the big man a large bear hug, trying to pull him down from behind. Ben raised the slight young man over his shoulder, held him aloft for a second, then dropped him on the floor.
"Ah, white man have strength of three thousand flies!!!"
They both laughed. They played around a little while longer and finally Ben left. Jimmy would man the station for the night and masturbate with Ben's fantasies firmly illuminated in his mind. Ben, on the other hand, would return home unable to sleep and unable to think.
Ben did not see her until he had parked his car in the driveway of his small, wood-framed cottage. Carrying the gas can under one arm and his coat under the other, he walked in the darkness along the sidwalk towards his front porch.
"Hello Ben."
"Who's there?" Ben stopped, searched into the dark shadows of the porch.
"I decided to take you up on your offer." Her voice was light and cheery. Anne stepped out of the darkness into the glare of the streetlight. She wore levis, a tee-shirt and an old suede jacket. She carried a duffle bag with a Berkeley tag on it.
"My God!" Ben said, half startled and half jubilant over having her standing on his porch. "I never expected to see you again!"
"Well, here I am! But I'm not a bitch anymore. Your offer made sense to me. I quit my job, put on some clothes and hitched down ... are you glad to see me?"
"Yes, dammit I mean, I hope you're serious!"
He looked at the young girl with her green eyes and straight black hair. She looked almost angelic in the white light. Her breasts were hanging free beneath her thin tee-shirt. She looked almost lost but nonetheless very sexy. He wondered if her presence would cause another scene, if she had changed from that night in her apartment in San Francisco.
"I've changed," she said softly, reading his concern. "I mean, I'm willing to try. If you're willing. But just one thing...."
"Okay, what is it?"
"Just tell me right now if you want me or not. If there's someone else ... or whatever, I'll just split right now and we won't hassle this at all."
She was giving him a chance to escape. Obviously, Anne had thought that he possibly could have been a married man on a weekend, a man who made promises inspired by liquor but who could never keep them. She watched him carefully.
"What I said to you then I meant. There's no hassle....""
Anne smiled brightly. She seemed very happy, and different from the girl he had known up North. "Well" she grinned, "aren't you even going to ask a homeless waif inside?"
Ben opened the front door and watched her tight little ass as she moved gracefully inside. His heart was beating hard and he could feel for the first time in a long while the blood surge without hindrance to his prick. As he walked into his little house where Anne was already busy looking around, Ben dropped the gas can onto the front porch, paying it no more notice than if it were a piece of wasted metal for which he had no more use.
"This place is a groove!" Anne wondered through the small living room into the kitchen then back down the hallway to the bedroom. Ben watched her with amusement, happy for the diversion.
"I just love these small cottages ... I mean, they're so cozy!"
She stood in the hallway, smiling out at Ben. He mixed a drink and watched her as she lifted the tee-shirt above her breasts then dropped the garment into the floor. He had forgotten how large and shapely her breasts were.
"Mind if I take a shower? I'm filthy from the road...."
She was already pulling her worn levis down across her hips. She stepped out of them and stood naked, her black cunt looking more inviting than Ben had remembered. When she turned and ran towards the bathroom, Ben had the tremendous urge to run after her, throw her face down on the carpet, and ram his already hard cock straight up her ass. Instead, he mixed himself a drink and listened to Anne as she sung off-key in the shower.
Anne's voice carried throughout the small house. Ben enjoyed the sound of her singing, it had been a long time since he had been with a girl long enough to really respond to her presence as a female. He sipped slowly on his drink, feeling the tension dissolve.
"I feel like a new woman!" She stood in the doorway, the wet towel draped around her hips. From the waist up she was naked. Her tits shone with cleanliness, and she seemed much younger than Ben had remembered her.
"How old are you?" He asked, now realizing that she was not as old as he had first thought.
"Does it make any difference?" She asked, sitting on the couch across from him.
"No ... I'm just curious, that's all."
She took her hair and held it outwards, then ran a comb slowly through it. The way her breasts moved upwards when she stroked herself made Ben seethe with desire. "I'm nineteen."
She waited, expecting a reaction from Ben. Instead, he sipped slowly on his drink and watched her naked breasts.
"Well?" She asked, suspending her movements in mid-air.
"Well what? I told you it doesn't make any difference and I meant it!"
But there was something strange about her being there, sitting half-nude across from him. They hadn't made it well enough in Frisco for her to be in love with him. She had watched him leave her apartment in a blaze of anger. But now, she was here. And there was no apparent reason for it. Ben decided to let the question ride, knowing that he would throw her into herself if he began prying.
"You want to fuck me?"
"Ben was taken back by her directness. She dropped her comb and stood up. The towel fell from her hips. Her naked body was even more finely put together than he had remembered. Her belly was hard and flat, and her little triangle of black hair was shining with cleanliness. She walked the space between them and pushed her belly towards him. She brought her hands down and spread her lips. Ben stared into the pink flesh there.
"You're gorgeous ... perfect!" He said, grabbing her buttocks and pulling her close to him. She moved easily this time beneath his grasp. She did seem more willing to let herself be taken than she was last time.
"I want you to teach me, Ben, just teach me everything you know...." She held his head against her belly. Her legs were spread, and when she lifted one and placed her foot on the couch, Ben was ready to begin the lesson.
She ran her fingers through his hair as he licked at her clit. The skin was warm and moist, and Ben began to feel that possibly the only motivation for her journey was him. He allowed that feeling to motivate him now, and dove into her young, well-formed cunt with vigor.
"Oh yeah ... that feels nice. It's right!" She was pushing herself hard against him. She had thrust herself outwards and was now wide open. Ben licked and searched inside her.
He stood above her. His nudity was emphasized by his prick which stood out hard and erect. Anne lay sprawled on the bed, her thighs moving rapidly against one another. She was in heat, her eyes were alive and penetrating. Her lips were moist and slightly parted. She was ready to be taken.
But as Ben felt himself slip between her lips, as he felt the warmth of her vagina surround his hot flesh, he knew that he still wasn't taking her. There was something left out, some element that just wasn't present. He pushed hard into her, and moved with an easy rhythym. But it still did not work.
Anne went through all the proper motions. She wrapped her young, white legs around his back. She arched herself high so that he could have all of her. She ran her fingers along the crack of his ass, plunging in an out at the right moments. Everything was done that should have been done to make it a good session, but there was something which didn't work.
When they had finished, and Ben lay smoking a cigarette while Anne lay against his shoulder, the thought once again entered his mind. There was something too contrived, too controlled about her appearance. Her change in sex, the way she had this time allowed him to ravage her, then had confessed that she had come for the first time seemed unreal to him. No one could change that quickly.
"You planning to stay here?" He asked, watching her reaction with interest.
"As long as you want me to...."
"Why did you come back here?" He did not really expect an honest answer, but he wanted to find out if her own story would change.
"I told you, dear, I wanted to take you up on your offer. I thought maybe you could help me." She did not look at him, but played with the little bush of pubic hairs from which emerged his cock.
"I don't understand you...."
"You will," she smiled, now looking him directly in the eyes, "you'll know me someday."
Ben ran his hand through her long hair. It felt silky and smoothe. She responded by reaching down and holding his penis in her hand. Her smile was wide and inviting. She threw her legs across his belly and rubbed the head of his prick against her crack.
"I can't seem to get enough of you!" She moaned, squeezing his prick up between her pink lips.
"Yeah ... right...."
But her manner, her smile and the feelings which Ben possessed towards her did not allow him to make it. He wanted to sleep, to allow his subconcious time to sift through the events of the past few days. Maybe there, in the uncensored dream images of sleep he would find the origin of the vague, slowly developing feelings of ominousness that seemed to be overtaking him.