Chapter 7

After I left school, began the Major's companion, I did not get work, but stayed at home to look after my father who was an invalid.

I was twenty-four years old when he died suddenly, and I was left alone (my mother having died when I was still at school). I had hoped that upon my father's death there would be enough money at least to carry me through the first years of life on my own. I intended to go to a commercial school, and train to be a secretary. It was with considerable dismay that I learned that my father had run his business affairs so badly that, after the sale of our house and all is effects, the sum left to me, would not amount to more than fifty pounds. It appeared that my father had gambled heavily on the stock exchange with disastrous consequences, and during the last few years had been living on the mortgage of the house and his remaining capital. The unpaid bills were legion.

Fortunately, I was young enough not to feel too depressed about the future. After the funeral, I saw our, lawyers obtained the fifty pounds from them, which I straight away placed in a Post Office account, and bought a ticket for London.

In the capital I found very cheap lodgings, paid a term's fees in advance at a commercial school, and settled down to a hardworking if rather meagre existence. By the time I had completed the course I had barely give pounds left, and during the period I had grown rather thin and had acquired the strained expression which is produced by prolonged under -nourishment.

My diploma in my hand-bag, I studied the Situations Vacant columns of the evening papers, and selected a number of firms whose advertised requirements were well covered by my qualifications. As I was putting the last paper down my eye caught the following advertisement, which I had not noticed at first:

TO START AT ONCE competent companion-secretary to titled lady. Full board, good pay, reasonable hours, pleasant country surroundings. Phone Little Wattlebury 14 or Write...

This, I thought, really did seem attractive. I could certainly do with some good food and country air, after my pinched period in London. I went into a Post Office, found out the charge for a telephone call to Little Wattlebury, got the necessary change to put in the box, and got through to the number.

A deep female voice answered almost at once. "Well,," it said.

"Good evening," I replied. "I'm phoning regarding .your advertisement."

"Good. When are you free to start?"

"Well, any time," I said.

"Good, that settles it. I can tell by your voice that you'll do. You don't whine like the awful cockney girls. Now listen carefully. Tomorrow morning there's a train from Euston at 11.45.

You change at Hump Ham stead le Grand. You should arrive at Little Wattlebury at 3.20. My car will be at the station to pick you up. Got that?"

"Yes, thank you very much," I said.

"By the way, what's your name?"

"Muriel Hester-Crawford."

"Fine. See you tomorrow."

"May I ask your name?"

"Yes, of course. The Duchess of Nossex. All right, then, till tomorrow afternoon." And she rang off.

I was a little surprised. I hadn't even been asked for references, nothing. Still, the Duchess of Nossex no doubt was one of those people who are capable of making lightning decisions. I went back to my lodgings, packed belongings, paid the rent that was due in lieu notice, and phoned up the station enquiry office. The single fare to Little Wattlebury was two pounds Eighteen Shillings. That meant that when I arrived at Little Wattlebury (allowing for some sandwiches for the journey) I should have about twelve shillings left. Supposing the Duchess suddenly canged her mind when she saw me? No, I reassured myself, she would hardly do that. And even if she did, she would certainly cover my expenses. All the same, as I went to sleep for the last time in my London lodgings, I still could not help feeling worried.

Next morning I set off on my journey. As the train steamed out of Euston station, I felt a mixture of exhileration and acute anxiety. As the journey wore on, however, my anxiety began to recede, and my natural optimism asserted itself. Everything would work out all right.

And it would be wonderful to be in country again, after months in the grimy air of London.

I changed at Hump-Hampstead-le-Grand, and after a short wait caught the connection to my destination. On the way I ate the sandwiches I had brought with me. I must have fallen asleep after that, because in no time at all the train jolted to a standstill a a tiny station set apparently ,in he middle of field, with a church village-visible about half a mile away. "Little Wattlebury" shouted the porter. I scrambled out on the platform, gave up my ticket, and went outside. Yes, there, sure enough, was a car-a Rolls Royce, and the evry young very handsome chauffeur looked enquiringly at me as I came out. I went up to the car.

"Muriel Hester-Crawford?" demanded the chauffeur.

"That's right," I said. I was little put out by the omission of the "Miss," but decided to overlook it.

He opened the door at the front. "G#t in", he said. This also jarred on me, but I re fleeted that beggars can't be choosers, and that T should just have to put up with the young man's surly manner. In any case, as the Duchess' personal secretary, I probably wouldn't be seeing very much of him. All the same, I thought, he might at least have helped me with my case.

In no time at all, I Was in the hall of Wat* tlebury Manor, and was shaking hands with a determined looking woman of about 45.

"Glad to see you, Muriel," she said. "Come along." She led me off, talking as Went down a corridor and into^ magnificent study.

"First of all," the Duchess said, "I'll shoW you your work. After that you can do what you like, and the maid will show you your roofn. I don't expect my secretary to keep to any fixed hours, all I want is that the work should be kept up to date. And by the Way, fas my secretary companion, I want yo to call me Angela. It makes me feel younger to he called by my christian name. Now here We are." She sat down at a desk, and motioned me to sit beside her. "Here's a list of replies to an advertisement I put in the London Morning Press for a male Assistant. As yon see, there are about sixty replies. Read the letters carefully and pick out the men between twenty and twenty-five, After that look through the letters again and make a final selection from the point of View of finacial standing, Pm interested only in the poorest young men,, provided they're not coarse or otherwise uneccaptable-. You can tell the poor applicants front the notepaper they use, and whether they're asking for their fare to be paid in advance for the interview, When you've made your final choice* make fifteen interviews for next week, Is that clear?"

"Yes, Angela," 1 said.

"Good, I'll leave you to it, then. Your pay, by the way, will be seven pounds a week, You don't have to dress for dinner unless the ghastly local fogeys are present. Since my husband's death I've simplified my life, and cut out a lot of rigmarole," She bustled off. The maid came in, and took me up to my room, which was on the third floor, facing across a great park. It was pleasantly furnished, and oh the whole I felt reasonably content, I tidied myself up, and went downstairs. A late lunch had been steout for me in the dining-room, and I must admit that, after months of very scanty mid-day snacks, I enjoyed the meal enormously* and probably ate too much.

I went into the study, and started work. I read all the letters carefully, and sifted them according to the Duchess' instructions. Then I typed out replies, rejecting 45 applicants and inviting the other fifteen to attend an interview. I signed each letter with my name, and "Secretary" after it. I left the letters unsealed for the Duchess to see. In any case, with eight of them there was fare money to he enclosed.

At five o'clock the maid brought in a tray of tea, toast, bread and butter, jam, and cakes. I had another gorge, and then carried on with the work. The Duchess came in at 5.30.

"How are you getting on?" she asked.

"I've finished the letters."

"Good." She looked through my replies and the corresponding applications. She took out a batch of notes from her dress pocket. Here's twenty pounds. That should pay all the single fares, and leave a few pounds over. Keep the change as an advance on your salary. The Local Post Office shuts at six, and the last post is at 6.15. Take the car down to the village, get the postal orders, and send all the letters off." I found the chauffeur-lying in a deck-chair in the garden and told him what I wanted. Without enthusiasm he brought the car round, sai "Hop in," and drove me to the village post office, which was also the village stores. I seized the opportunity to but a few articles for myself.

On the way back I tried to make conversation. "Those people in the post office seemed terribly strange in their manner," I said.

"Yokels," replied the chauffeur laconically.

"I certainly received some very curious stares," I said.

"Shouldn't think about it, he said. "In fact I shouldn't worry about anything. Do your job, get your money, don't poke around too much in dark corners, and forget everything you hear. The food's good here, and you look to me as if you could do with plenty of it."

Once again his manner irritated me. "My father died suddenly," I said, "and I had to finish a course as secretary on very little money."

"That's your own business," he said.

We arrived at the Manor, and I went into the study. The Duchess was waiting for me. "Dinner's at eight," she said. I shouldn't do my more work to-night, hut tomorrow there'll be another batch of letters. I want a London girl-just one-to look after the chickens and all that sort of thing. But I don't want one of these fancy young women who feel lost if they don't return to London once a month. In the advertisement I've asked for family particulars. You'd better choose a very young girl with no family at all, and if there isn't one among the applicants then at least a girl with relatives no nearer than Ireland. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Angela," I said.

"How about your own relatives?" she asked.

"Since, my father's death there's nobody."

I said, She looked a* me thoughtfully, but did not say anything.

I enjoyed the dinner, which was beautifully recked, and Angela encouraged me to eat enormous portions of everything. Wo were the alone at dinner, and the bottle of rich red wine we had between us went a little to my head. Angela seemed very cheerful, and remarked several times that she wait cert tain that I would settle down in the job and would probably never want to leave the Manor.

Shortly after the dinner, tired out by the journey and, to tome extent, by the grain of the preceding months, I fell fast asleep almost immediately.

The week passed almost uneventfully. I settled down easily into the routine. The Duchess, Angela, was always reasonable in her manner to me if a little eccentric at times. The chauffeur-Harry-also was not so bad, when one got know him better. The maid, Alice, was extremely obliging at all times. The work was not at all difficult, though at times I could not understand what I was doing. I was putting on weight, and the country air suited me. Admittedly the atmosphere in the manor was a little mysterious, and at times I even had serious misgivings-for no reason at all-but generally I was perfectly content.

A day before the fifteen young men were due to arrive for interviews the girl for whom the Duchess had advertised made her a appearance. She was a pleasant little creature simple and possibly a bit stupid, but with a nice face, a good figure, and a friendly manner. She had an old aunt still alive in Eire, but beyond that nobody in the world. She had not enjoyed her few first months in London where she worked at as washer-up one of the truly awful places which dish out precooked lunches in their millions to the unfortunate inhabitants of the capital. She was pathetically grateful to be back in * country setting, and to breathe the country air. Angela took one look at her, seemed to decide at once that she was quite suitable, and whisked her away.

The next day the young men began to arrive. They were in all, quite a nice-looking lot, all young, and most of them with reasonable backgrounds. For the most part they were the sons, of not very successful clerks they were better in class than the Cockneys against whom they would have had to struggle in London, yet they did not possess the means to bide their time in order to start a proper career at a good job. In short, they were as pressed for work as I had been, and all of them seemed most anxious to make a good impression on the Duchess. There was one boy I particularly liked; his name was Gerry Thomas, and he was the son of a retired customs official. He had thick brown hair, a lot of freckles, and a constant smile.

He was taller than most of the other boys, and had, on the whole, an easier manner.

My job, when they had all arrived, was Co get them to complete a form, to verify as best as I could any documents they might have brought with them, and then to pass them to Angela via Alice who led them away, one by one, to another part of the house.

It was nine o'clock when I had finished my part of the work, and I wondered where the young men would all spend the night, as the last train from Little Wattlebury left at 7 o'clock.

Angela did not turn up for dinner, and I ate on my own. By now I had acquired quite a taste for dinner wines, not was I averse to liqueurs which were always in plentiful supply. Angela allowed me to eat to drink anything I wanted, and I had also started to smoke.

I went to bed and, as usual, immediately fell asleep.

I woke suddenly. I had had a nightmare in which at he end there was a man screaming for help. As I woke up, I imagined that I could still hear the scream. There was a silence and then suddenly I heard the scream again. I sat up in bed. Was it the drink? I wondered. I had actually been drinking a little too much lately. I listened for a long time, but could hear nothing more. Dismissing the matter from my mind. I went back to sleep.

The next morning Angela did not appear at breakfast. I asked Alice how the young men had managed to get home, and whether any of them had been selected for the work Angela bad in mind (I was actually still very hazy about the nature of this work). To my surprise Alice said nothing, looked at me sharply, and turned away.

"Is there anything wrong, Alice," I asked.

Alice would not meet my eyes. She was going to go out, ignoring my question, then she seemes to change her mind, looked at the door fearfully, bent over me and said in a low voice. "It's starting again, Miss. 9c be careful. And don't let on ever that you've seen anything,"

"Whatever do you mean?" I asked.

"It's all the better for you if you don't know," she said. "And if ever you do get to know, you remember my words-act stupid. That's what I've been doing for-years." And with that she went off.

I must say I was very much put out by

Alice's manner, But the day was beautifully gunny, the air outside was particularly clean a and crisp, and I very soon forgot the incident.

I did not have very much work to do, and decided to ask Angela at lunch-time what else there was to be done. But at lunch-time Angela was still not to be seen. I ate my lunch on my own* Alice made it all too clear that she did not want to he questioned, and I did not press her.

After lunch, to nil in the time and give myself something to do, I began to sort out the contents of the desk. To my surprise the drawers of the desk were filled with letters of application for work similar to those writ" ten by the young men who had arrived the day before. There seemed to be thousands of these letters. I noticed that the dates on them went back almost ten years. What sort of a business could Angela be running to employ as many people? I wondered, I made a makeshift file and arranged the letters alphabatically and by date.

At dinner I was still on my own, and I must confer that I was beginning to feel a trifle worried. But I managed to contain myself, sad did not put any questions to Alice. I went up to my room shortly after dinner. I felt remarkably tired. I supposed it was the strain of unaccustomed speculation and the recurrence of worry. I go undressed and at ance fell asleep. Next morning I woke up very early. I felt heavy and not too well.

The day progressed slowly, and in between meals I carried on with my improvised fieling. At dinner, I was surprised to see an envelope on the table with my name on it. I opened it, and found that it contained my usual week's salary to which were added two pounds more. The note-in Angela's handwritingsaid: "Sorry to neglect you, Muriel dear, but I have a lot of important things to attend to at present. Don't worry if there's nothing much to do at the moment for you. I am more than satisfied with your work to date, Angela."

I felt a little better after reading the notewhich acted on me as a kind of normaliserand I tackled my dinner with appetite. For once decided not to drink the wine which was on the table with my dinner, but to to take it up to my room, and to drink it a leisure while I brought my diary up to date (I had neglected my diary since I had arrived at the Manor). I poured the wine off into a water caraffe and placed it on the side-board. Then I carried on with my meal. Alice appeared for brief intervals to serve each course and immediately went off again.

It was a little startling to be left so completely on my own in the great house, and I was glad to have the wine to take up with me to my room.

I sat down at my window, and began to write up my diary. The task proved to be very interesting, and I did not notice the time pass. On looking at my watch, when I had finished my task, I discovered to my amazement that it was almost midnight. I had also forgotten to drink any of the wine. I got undressed and climbed into bed. I found that sleep eluded me, and I put this fact .down to my having devoted so many hours to the more intimate thoughts and memories which I had written down in my diary.

I was still wide awake when I heard the scream. It was the scream of a young man in great pain, and I immediately recollecte the scream I had thought I had imagined hearing the night before. Without putting on the light, I went to the window and listened. Was it my imagination or could I hear the beating of a drum? Then suddenly the scream sounded again.

I was both frightened and curious, I knew that unless I explained the sounds away, should not be able to sleep at all, and would imagine all sorts of horrors. I was already frightened, but I was determined, in my owa interests, to control my fear and to get to the bottom of the mystery... I slipped on a dresSingtgown over my night-dress, put on my slippers, and, opening my door quietly, went downstairs. The lights were out, But the bright moonlight stealing in through the big windows on the stairway wag sufficient for me to And my way to the study, from which I entered the garden by a French window.

It was a warm night, and the manor ground seemed very beautiful and invitingly romantic in the moonlights I found myself quite enjoying my expedition. Then I heard the scream again, and my pleasure at the surroundings turned to apprehension. I stood still and listened. Yes, there, to my right I could distinctly hear the beating of a drum I hesitated, then made up my mind, am quickly but quietly moved across the ground in the direction of the sounds I had heard.

I came to the copse at the edge of the lawn and plunged in among the trees. The sound of the drum became louder and louder. My heart beating, I advanced through the copse, across another great lawn, and into a small thicket which I now remembered bordered the beautiful rose-garden which was laid out In the form of a Roman arena, with the ground rising on each side from the Centre, and a great circle of rose-rose-trees circling the perimeter. The sound of the drum was now very distinct, and I approached the edge of the rose-garden cautiously. As I ascended to the edge of the garden, I moved more and more slowly, as from the outside the slope was quite steep. Finally I reached the top, and looked down. The scene which met my eyes Was so incredible that I almost cried out. Fortunately, the rose trees all the way along the top concealed me from view, otherwise, so stricken with surprise was I, that t am lure I should not have had the sense to conceal myself.

In the Centre Of the rose-garden a torch was burning It Was a strange Sort of torch, such as I had never seen before. To call it a multicoloured flare would not describe it adequately, for it produced such extraordinary light effects as I have had never seen before. The torch was burning on the plinth which .was set in front of a white marble column, the day-time I had often wondered what use the plinth and the marble column could possibly serve. Now I knew. Tied to the column was a naked man-and I at once recognized one of the young me who had come for the interview. In front of him, also naked, a crown of some glittering metal on her head, stood Angela. In her hand was a long knife. All round her, in a wide circle were the other young men I had seen arriving at the interview? They were all naked, too. A little apart from them, another naked young man was beating a drum-and I immediately recognized Bill the chauffeur. Then another circumstance sank into my consciousness: all the men were in a state of erection. I had never seen a naked man before, but of course I had had my secret dreams. Suddenly now I was confronted with the vision of about twenty young men in the nude, all with their cocks erect. Inside myself I felt the strong warm tingling of^cTesire and lust. I tried to feel ashamed of myself, but I couldn't. My eyes searched avidly for the young men's cocks and balls, and my whole body itched with passion as I saw their taut cocks swinging from side to side as they danced to the drum. I had terrible struggle with an insane impulse to tear off my night-dress, and to join the dancing group. I could so well imagine some of the young men's bodies touching mine... The drum quickened, became fiercer and fiercer, the circle of young men widened, and Angela raised her hand with the gleaming knife high above her head and laughed wildly. "Shall I do it?" she shouted wildly. "Yes! yes! shouted back the young men in frenzy. Angela now slowly began to dance in front of the young man who was tied to the column. Taking my eyes off her for a moment, I recognized with a thrill of searing pleasure the naked body of Gerry Thomas-the boy I had liked best of the party who had arrived for the interview. My eyes went over slim muscular body and fastened upon his cock. My stomach and my breasts contracted with a burning desire as I saw his taut cock gleaming in the light of the torch. Greedily I looked at his balls, then again at his cock. I felt I was going mad, so strong was my itch to seize that lovely young body and feel that cock thrusting itself into my cunt... Angela by now had advanced to the young man at the column, and I noticed that he was already bleeding from his balls.

But his cock stood out straight in front of him. The drum-beat became savage and tumultuous. With an insane cry, Angela dug the knife into the young man's part. He let out a terrible scream, at which Angela laughed . The other men also laughed. From the plinth Angela now produced another knife, a long curved one with a wide blade. She brought it down on the young man's bleeding parts, and severed his cock at one blow. Agreat stream of blood poured out from the orifice where the cock had been. With the same knife Angela now bent down, seized his balls and sliced them off from the body. Then she bent down to the gushing blood and let it fall over her. She picked up the dismembered cock, and holding it and the balls in one hand and the knife in the other, let out a maniacal command to the naked men. Immediately they all converged towards the column. Each one ecstatically smeared himself in the blood. The they reformed the circle and resumed their dance, which was now slow and triumphant.

Suddenly watching, I felt terribly sick and faint and frightened. I was sticky too with the orgasm which I had involunatarily experienced. I knew that if I didn't get back at once, I should pass out, and then Heaven only knows what would happen to me. Gritting my teet I ran back to the manor. Shivering and sick, I made my way back to my room and threw myself onto the bed, and at once fell into a nightmarish sleep.

The Major's companion paused, and lit a cigarette, after taking a sip at her whiskey.

"I am sorry to He so long in unfolding my story," she said. "But it's a strange story that I can never separate the irrelevant elements from the .relevant ones and I hope you will bear with me."

The company expressed their whole-hearted agreement, more drinks were ordered, and the Major's continued her story.