Chapter 3
The Man Who Loved Virgins
"I love virgins. As a matter-of-fact I can hardly abide any other type of female as a bed companion. But while most men who share this preference with me derive their main pleasure from the deflowering of these innocents, I am just the opposite. I do not like breaking the cherries of virgins; on the contrary, I like avoiding doing just that, and I like virgins because they, or at least many of them, are interested in holding on to their virginity. You see, I'm a man who gets little enjoyment from fucking young or old ladies in the cunt. I consider the cunt sort of, well, nasty-a silly gash where something much more interesting could have been placed. So I seek out women who like any kind of sex besides regular fucking. And young virgins fit the bill very well.
"I realize, of course, that my tastes are out of the ordinary, even odd. But after all, they are more varied than most men's. For instance, I thoroughly enjoy all the types of preliminary sex -you know, foreplay and all-including every sort of oral play. This is probably going to surprise you after what I said just a moment ago, but I really don't even mind what is delicately called cunnilingus-licking and sucking a woman's cunt . . . as long as I don't have to stick my prick in there. I suppose there's some sort of fear that Freud or one of these modern psychological thinkers could explain involved, but I really don't care-I am what I am, as Popeye used to say.
"On the other hand, I don't mind sticking my cock in any other part of a lady's anatomy-especially an asshole or a nice juicy mouth. I relish such things, in fact.
"Now, if you're starting to make connections in your mind concerning what I've said about asshole-fucking and 'silly gashes' and my distaste for normal intercourse, and you're coming to the conclusion that I'm a fag (or 'gay' to use the more accepted term), well I'll just have to assure you that you're wrong and leave it at that. I don't care what anyone thinks about my sexual behavior. But I'm quite willing to discuss it, since I'm not in the least ashamed of anything I've done.
"The sex life of me, Michael J-, has consisted up to my current thirtieth year on this planet of one affair after another that has constituted a search for the perfect woman. Perfect for me, anyhow. I'd rather skip all the messy little meaningless false steps and concentrate on those affairs which were easily standouts from the rest.
"Marsha was my first true love. She wasn't the first one I fooled around with, but she was the first one I hit it off well with. I was sixteen and she was merely twelve. By the time things started with her, I had had enough experience with other girls to have completely discovered what my proclivities were. I knew what I wanted, and Marsha knew what she didn't want, and-for a while, at least-that was enough of a basis for some great teenage sex.
"Marsha and I couldn't let anyone else know that we were seeing each other-the age differences were too great and the southern town of 25,000 that we lived in was one of rather strict moral character. So, after mutually deciding that we wanted to try out this thing called sex together, without damaging the precious jewel of her virginity, we planned a meeting one Saturday afternoon in an old deserted shack that lay on the edge of town.
"Once we were together there, we stumbled and fidgeted around for some time, not knowing exactly how to get started in a comfortable manner. But finally she, being the bolder of us two, took off her sweater, leaving her red skirt and black shoes on. The sight was stimulating to a sixteen-year-old boy, to say the least. It was a hot summer afternoon, and her small but certainly prominent breasts gleamed with a slight sheen of perspiration. She held her arms down to the sides, even though it must have been hard for a shy twelve-year-old to do, and she let me openly admire her beauty.
"Her olive complexion turned redder with blushing as I stared at her. Her dark, long hair cascaded down over thin shoulders, which were slightly freckled, to almost reach the point where her pert titties swelled up from her delicate chest. She was as slim as a fawn, and her belly, indented very cutely by a deep navel, was almost board-flat.
"As I gazed at her semi-nudity, not only did she blush from her face to her upper chest, but there was another sign of response; her small, boyish nipples began to poke outward until they were larger and thicker than any male's could be. They were a gorgeous brown-red color. Making my first overt movement, I reached over and tweaked one. A strange smile lit her face as I did, and her reaction turned me on as much as anything. A hard on was growing in my jeans, approaching its upper limit in size, and I was sure that she'd noticed the bulge it was causing. Amazingly, her eraser-like nipple grew ever larger as I held it between my forefinger and thumb. I grabbed the other one in the same way, and a soft sigh escaped the young girl's lips.
"Now I began to stop wondering what I was supposed to do, and just followed the demands of my increasing lust. I bowed my head, stuck out my tongue and licked one of the nipples I had been tweaking. Another sigh came from above. At first I licked lightly, teasingly, but this soon transformed into a more feverish, hard approach, until finally I swooped the nipple and much of the white breast that surrounded it into my mouth. I sucked inward; I continued to lick; I bit ever so lightly. Her hands went to the back of my head. Meanwhile, my hand played the devil with her other breast.
"As we got more and more carried away, we fell, without really noticing it, to the dirty floor of the shack. I hastily pulled off my shirt and jeans while she divested herself of her skirt and shoes.
"Her eyes bugged out at the sight of what sprang up from my loins. My prick was man-size and very imposing, and I think it was the first one she had ever seen. Some of her enthusiasm left her for a moment, but as soon as I saw that she was beginning to have second thoughts I went after those breasts again. After she'd begun to relax some and get back into the heat of the situation, I let a hand trail down to that secret place between her legs. It was creamy and hairless, and the outer lips were already more than a little moist. I let my forefinger push in just a half inch or so, while I silenced her objections with a tongue-to-tongue kiss. I was feeling very much in control of things, considering I had been with only three other girls-and those had been frustrating and disappointing experiences.
"My hard prick kept rubbing against her soft thighs, and though I had no thought of trying to put it in her virginal cunt-that would have made it immediately shrivel up-I'm sure she wasn't totally convinced of that. So, to keep her from getting so frightened that she might pull away from me before we could have a satisfactory conclusion, I went straight to a very bold request.
"I asked her to suck me off. I figured that she might be so scared that I was going to force her that she might be relieved at anything else. I was right.
" 'I want you to do it to me too,' she said. That was fair enough, so Marsha and I each indulged ourself in a wonderful sixty-nine. It was the first time for both of us. I think we each did a good job, though, considering our inexperience.
"She had innate talent as a cocksucker. She got above me and took my hard rod in hand, placing her wet cunt above my face. I felt a little distaste for what I was supposed to do when I stared at her pink slit, but this changed rapidly after I felt a delightfully pointed tongue stick out and touch the rim of my circumcised cock. The tongue traced a complete circle around the rim three times, then the whole head was engulfed by her hot mouth. More in involuntary reaction, like a knee-jerk, than anything else, my head raised and I glued my lips to her cunt.
"As she moved her head up and down on my stiff rod, playing with the base with her hand, I ran my tongue from one end of her slit to the other-from her clitoris (though I wasn't too sure about what or where that was at the time) to her asshole. To my own personal surprise, and to her squirming delight, I found myself concentrating quite a bit on her asshole, licking it and dipping my tongue in. Her cunt was actually dripping, the juice rolling down her sleek, sweaty thighs.
"My prick grew even larger in her thin-lipped mouth. She was really into cocksucking, plunging as much of the rod into her mouth as she could, until it was pounding against the opening of her throat. Even that seemed to give way, and delightful sensations that I'd never even dreamed of took hold of me as the head of my cock was titillated by her clasping throat. I grew ever more excited until finally the moment came, and for the first time in my short life I spewed the contents of my balls into a girl's mouth. Spurt after spurt flowed into her virginal mouth until she couldn't swallow fast enough, and it dripped in creamy gobs onto my crotch. I'd had my pleasure and satisfaction, but I dutifully kept my lips and tongue working on her cunt until she'd had hers. Her climax came a minute later, and it seemed to be a good, heavy one. She squirmed around so much it was nearly impossible for me to keep my mouth on her. Finally her hips fell in a spasm of complete satisfaction, and I moved out from under her, turned around and kissed her.
"We had many other fine meetings that summer, most of them centering around oral sex, until finally we broke up.
"The reason Marsha and I broke up was because she wasn't willing to go beyond what we regularly did. On the other hand, I was always looking for new methods, new vistas. In particular at that time, I wanted to fuck her in the ass. She didn't go for that idea, and neither did any of the girls I was to meet in the next five years, but finally, when I was twenty-one and had moved to Los Angeles, California, I met a virgin even wilder than Marsha-one who was willing to allow me to indulge in a greater variety of perversions. Her name was Jeannie, and she was a would-be actress.
"I guess Jeannie will always be kept from stardom because she refuses to do what a starlet has to usually do to take the first step toward the big time-lay on the casting couch for a succession of producers and directors. She'd sucked off quite a few, I was to learn, and had done just about everything else with them, but she inevitably wound up pissing them off because she wouldn't fuck them. She was nineteen and still, unbelievably in this society of ours, a bona fide virgin.
"I met Jeannie at a party-a pretty wild one given by one of the big producers in town. I was a newcomer to the Hollywood party scene, being new in town and just a third-string makeup man for a small company. But Jeannie, even at her tender age, was already an old pro at these things, and she spotted me right away as fresh material. It was her who picked me up. The party had progressed to the point where most of the food had been consumed, some movies watched, couples and groups formed, and now the lights were down low and soft music was playing and various tete-a-tetes were going on all around the three largest rooms of the mansion. These tete-a-tetes were mostly sexual, or getting that way.
"There I sat, all on my own, knowing only the person-another makeup man-who had brought me to the party, and he'd disappeared somewhere. All around me there were people doing what comes naturally (and perhaps unnaturally), giggling, sighing, moaning, clothes flying about. I just sat there with a hard on. Then I spotted another solitary figure across the room. It was female-definitely female. Big, big tits, to start with, that were about to overflow a low-cut, slinky satin dress. Long, shiny blonde hair-almost platinum. That was about all I could tell in the semi-dark. Except for one more important thing: she was looking at me-staring, in fact-and smiling!
"As my eyes were able to focus more on her in the low light, I saw that not only did she have a fantastic body, she had a fabulously pretty face as well. She was probably the most beautiful woman at the party and she was alone and giving me the eye. Then she actually came over and sat down beside me-before I even thought about daring to make a move.
"Well, to make a long story short, as we talked
I found out about her virginity and the unpopularity it caused her in the Hollywood in-crowd. (Actually, people liked her fine, but avoided her sexually because they knew they wouldn't get fucked.) And I confessed my leanings. We were both delighted and went tearing through the hallways of the place looking for an empty bedroom.
"We couldn't find one, but we did find a room that Jeannie guaranteed would be even better for us than an empty one. In it, a couple of her friends, a man and a woman-both fortyish, had just finished fucking. In fact, they went through the writhing and groans and moans of coming just as we opened the door on them-in glaring light. They weren't the least bit embarrassed at being discovered in orgasm-on the contrary, they just looked up, after a short period of total exhaustion, and waved hello. The guy, after an introduction, left the room to search for different quarry, leaving Jeannie, myself, and the new woman alone there. Jeannie and the woman smiled at each other in a special way and then Jeannie told me to settle back in a chair and just relax and watch for a while.
"I wasn't exactly in the mood for that, but I did as she told me and I was soon glad I did.
"Jeannie, in her search for every type of available sex outside of fucking, had come upon the advantages of lesbianism, or at least bisexuality, and she practiced such with great relish and skill, as I and the redheaded fortyish woman were soon to find out.
"Nineteen-year-old Jeannie took complete control of the situation and turned the other woman every way but loose. First she went directly to the slightly fat but pleasingly shaped woman's cunt and sucked out the sperm that the man had deposited there. Then she roamed over what seemed every inch of the woman's skin with those busy lips, sucking at her lust-laden nipples, locking tongues, teasing ears, kissing the insides of elbows, caressing the soft skin of thighs, even mouthing the woman's toes. It all sent the older woman out of her mind with ecstasy, and when Jeannie's expert lips landed once again on the woman's cunt, the redhead went into orgasm after orgasm. The blonde kept after her, even though she tried-it seemed-to get away, until the woman couldn't move. Then she rose and planted her own cunt on the woman's face, forcing her to eat her out until the dominant younger girl came, too. I watched her raging orgasm with an equally raging prick that was demanding some sort of relief. After she'd finished twisting about on the woman's face with the last strains of her climax, she beckoned me over with a finger, and I was very willing to be cooperative.
"Jeannie started off by ordering the other woman to offer me her tits to suck on while Jeannie went to work on my throbbing cock. Her lips and tongue traced a tantalizing up and down path along the sides of the towering pole, until my hips were lurching up at her face madly. Meanwhile I filled my own hungry mouth with the older woman's slightly drooping boobs, teasing the wide aureoles and nipples until they stood out red and angry.
"After several minutes of deliberately teasing my cock, Jeannie finally totally engulfed it in her hot mouth. The feeling was terrific, out of this world. Her head instantly began a wild, insane bobbing motion, putting the most wet friction possible on my weapon. In response, I bit down on the nipple I had in my mouth. The redhead let out a savage yell, started to pull the breast away from me, thought better of it and shoved in even harder against my face.
"This kept on for a while and then, at Jeannie's instructions, the two crazy women changed places. Now I had Jeannie's huge, motherly tits to squeeze with my hands and suck and bite. The older woman pumped my cock voraciously with her mouth.
"Finally, I had to raise up and away from the nineteen-year-old's great breasts to shout at the other woman, 'Stop!' It's a good thing she immediately obeyed my command because if she hadn't she would have had a gob full of come and I wouldn't have been able to do what I wanted most to do with Jeannie-at least not for thirty minutes more or so.
"As Jeannie and I positioned ourselves for an ass-fuck, the other woman started pleading for me to fuck her first. She meant in the cunt, of course, and that was out of the question. Even if she'd meant in the ass, I would have passed her up at that moment. She was certainly no virgin. And Jeannie was. As I moved behind her, in fact, I made a quick, hardly noticeable test-pushing my finger into her cunt. There it was-that precious maidenhead just perceptibly blocking entrance.
"At the same moment when I made this test, I asked the redheaded fortyish woman to leave the room. Thanks but goodbye. She was pretty angry, but she did as I asked. As soon as the door slammed, I placed my cockhead against Jeannie's asshole.
" 'Jesus, don't do it without wetting it a little!' Jeannie said, jumping.
" 'But it is wet,' I argued impatiently. 'From you two sucking me off.'
" 'You'll need more than that,' she replied. 'It's going to hurt enough as it is. You're a very well hung man, you know.'
"She sure knew how to mix a request with flattery. She recommended that I rub the head of my prick against her wet vaginal slit. Usually I would have been terribly reluctant to do this, but since she was so nice about it, and so beautiful, and I wanted to do this so very much, I went ahead and did as she suggested, moistening the upper half of my cock thoroughly in her dripping but virginal trench. Then I brought my rod back up to the pinched aperture of her anus. By this time, my cock was absolutely aching for stimulation, friction, and relief. With a careful but firm push, I lodged the whole crown of my penis in her asshole, watching the operation from above with glee, and hearing her loud gasp with equal delight.
" 'Oh, God, wait a minute before you shove any more of that gigantic thing in me. Just a few seconds, please. Oh God, but that monster is a thick one,' Jeannie said.
"I concentrated on the lovely sight of her shapely body, crowned by her hanging platinum hair, for a while, and let my mind swim with the unbelievable sensations that her tight aperture was causing around my cock head. Her anus naturally tried to push the cock back out, and would have succeeded if I hadn't kept a steady pressure against her asscheeks, while my hands held onto her wide hips.
"I pushed my enormous hard on another inch into her grabbing asshole. She made a sound in her throat like some dying animal. I gave a snapping lurch of my hips and another full inch, maybe two, imbedded themselves in the extraordinarily tight channel.
" 'Oh shit,' she gasped gravelly. 'It hurts, baby, but it hurts real good. Give me more.'
"I answered her by plunging what was left of my throbbing prick-and fully half of it was still outside her-into the clinging hole with a grinding thrust.
" 'Ahhh,' we cried out together.
"I let the cock rest where it was for a moment, fully enjoying the strange and new sensations, then I pulled back slowly until once again half of the fat penis was outside her hole. I pushed it in again, but very gradually this time.
"Time after time I made that glorious trip, letting more and more of my cock out so that more plunged in with each lunge, and my back and forth motions got faster each time, faster and faster, until I was fucking that sweet asshole, ramming against her heavy asscheeks, with a piston-like action.
"I fell forward some and supported myself against her strong back so that I could let one hand grab as much as it could hold of one mountainous tit, while the other searched out and found her piping clitoris, and strummed it in rhythm with my hard thrusts into that wonderfully clinging ass.
"As we both approached our orgasms I grabbed her big tit and pinched her pea-like clit as roughly as I could. My actions became automatic, and she behaved like a well-oiled sex machine herself, pushing back against my each and every stroke with fervor. She was gasping out every dirty word she could think of between ragged breaths.
"I kept pouring cock into her like a madman, like it was going to be my last come on earth, not holding back in the least, yet still my cock stayed hard and refrained from coming until my ears heard and my body felt the unmistakable signs of her own orgasm. When it came, it was hard to hold onto her and keep my prick lodged in her, but somehow I managed, and throughout her long and wild climax I kept throwing in that fat cock to the hilt.
"Just as she went into the last writhing of her come, her passion finally subsiding, I felt the sperm well up in my balls and shoot forward into her ass. I came with short, quick, hard strokes, pumping her depths full of what seemed to be a gallon of sperm.
"I collapsed on top of her and then fell over to the side. To my surprise, she didn't just lay there to catch her breath but instead turned her body about on the bed and sucked my softening but still hard prick into her mouth. She sucked and licked my cock until it was completely clean. Her mouth was like a wet, soft vacuum cleaner, and she kept at it a long time. Miraculously, what she had in her mouth grew as large or larger than it had been before, and I had the pleasant decision of what to do with it now to make.
"She made a suggestion and it sounded great to me . . . I got on top of her as she lay on her back-and put my stiff cock between her watermelon tits. She held them against the cock from the sides and I pumped away to another climax, spewing my cream onto her neck and face.
"Night after night following that, Jeannie and I experimented with ways to have sex without breaking a cherry. She was great-but a better virgin was to come in my life . . . Mary."
Michael J., the subject of this case history, is a classic paradigm of a neurotic whose neuroses are the fruit of old-fashioned morality and old-wives' tales. In the first portion of his narrative, the subject gives two interrelated hints as to the reasons for his refusal to engage with a female in regular coitus. First, he states that "the . . . town . . . that we lived in was one of rather strict moral character"; further in his narrative comes an even more specific and revealing statement.
In his rather crude description of his sexual affair with Marsha, he says: My [erection] kept rubbing against her soft thighs, and though I had no thought of trying to put it in her virginal [vagina]-that would have made it immediately shrivel up [italics are the commentator's]-I'm sure she wasn't totally convinced of that."
The above-cited statements made by the subject, even though they are concealed in the verbiage of his narrative and are not repeated anywhere else within it, are the key to the nature of his problem. Pursuant to the first basis of Michael J.'s development, being raised in an environment of "strict moral character," a quota-tation from Bertrand Russell's Marriage and Morals throws considerable light on the nature of such a moral code. Bertrand Russell writes:
. . . St. Paul does not deign to tell us why he thinks fornication so wicked. One is inclined to suspect that, having thrown over the Mosaic law, and being therefore at liberty to eat pork, he wishes to show that his morality is nevertheless quite as severe as that of orthodox Jews. . . .
. . . The Christian view that all intercourse outside marriage is immoral was . . . based upon the view that all sexual intercourse, even within marriage, is regrettable. A view of this sort, which goes against biological facts, can only be regarded by sane people as a morbid aberration. The fact that it is embedded in Christian ethics has made
Christianity throughout its whole history a force tending towards mental disorders and unwholesome views of life.
Such as the views expressed by the subject of this case. And the pathos of his situation becomes even more acute when one stops to consider the second telltale statement of his narrative.
The first interpretation of the phrase-"that would have made it immediately shrivel up" that comes to mind is that Michael J. is suffering from what might be termed "situational impotence." In other words, one is given the impression that the subject loses his erection whenever he attempts intromission. That, however, is not the case. The statement is actually one of the subject's beliefs regarding the results or consequences of the "sinful act of fornication." One can hypothesize the exact wording of the old-wives' dictum that was directed at the subject at some point in his youth, probably when he was apprehended by the adult authorities in an attempt at, or possibly even in the actual act of, copulating with a girl: "If you do such a nasty and evil thing again, God will make it [the penis] fall off or shrivel up into nothing."
The side effect of such an admonition would, naturally, be that the boy-if he is young enough at the time the threat of divine punishment is directed at him-not only begin to consider the female pudenda as evil, but would extend the definition of evilness to include any female who had permitted such "a nasty and evil act" to be perpetrated upon her. The end result of such reasoning would, or could, understandably lead the subject to avoid any female except one who was a virgin.
How can one reconcile the subject's single-minded, or single-channeled, fear-of-punishment motivated "morals" or "ethics" (of not engaging in vaginal sexual intercourse) with his otherwise totally hedonistic behavior? He is not averse, as his narration indicates, to engage in all sort of anal and oral acts, excesses and sexual crudities, often with girls well below the age of consent.
One could probably explain this apparent paradox of morbidly aberrant morals and of hedonism existing side by side by a supplantation or transference of normal sexuality-condemned, in fact, as "evil" by the subject's early childhood authority figures-to an approximation of such natural sexual drives. The hedonistic acts, consequently, may be considered as being both defense mechanism acts and acts of antiauthoritarian rebellion.
Still further, the subject's absolute reluctance to engage in vaginal intercourse, and his resultant extra-coital activities, as well as his limitation of such activities to virgins, could be explained by the possibility raised earlier in the commentary, specifically that of actual "situational" or "circumstantial" impotence. This would in no way rule out the earlier given interpretation of his reference to "shriveling up."
Robert E. Rothenberg, in his Medical Guide to Sex & Marriage, unequivocally states that "psychiatrists have discovered a close relationship between impotence and a highly developed sense of guilt." David Reuben, in his Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex but Were Afraid to Ask, comments:
There is convincing evidence that the source of male potency is the brain. Without going into the complicated theories involved, some psychiatrists have excellent results in curing men of impotence. Simply by talking, that is, helping them understand the emotional conflict underlying their sexual handicap, normal potency is restored. If the defect were physical, all the words in the world wouldn't have the slightest effect on a crumpled penis. Further proof comes from research using hypnosis. In response to suggestions implanted during a hypnotic session, erection and ejaculation can be restored and precisely controlled. These events can be placed even under the conscious control of the patient.. . .
There can be no doubt that there is strong, underlying feeling of guilt in the subject of this case. The step from the guilt feeling, first felt at the time of his being caught in flagrante delicto with a girl, to impotence in any subsequent attempts on his part to engage in regular coitus with a girl, is a natural one. The association of his inability to erect with the female genitalia-specifically the vagina-being the target for the erection is psychologically a "sound" one. The redirection of his sexual drives into non-coital ones cannot be considered as anything other than logical under the circumstances.
The only other alternative that the subject would have considered-aside from seeking psychiatric help-would have had to be total abstention from sexual activity.
"I just met Mary two months ago. She's only thirteen years old, but she likes older men. She likes me especially. And she absolutely loves sex. She was a virgin when I met her, but she isn't any longer. Yes, I broke her cherry. But not the normal way, as you'll see.
"Mary's a runaway. I picked her up hitchhiking one day, and invited her over to smoke some dope. I know that and what I've done since is taking quite a large chance with the law, but when I explain what Mary looks like, maybe you'll understand.
"She's really built for her age. I mean, you just don't see that many thirteen-year-olds with a body like this. She must have started getting tits when she was eight or nine, because now they're two big, full pouches, and though she never wears a bra, her tits, the way they stick against her tee shirts and sweaters, look like she's wearing one of those uplift type bras all the time.
"Her nipples are very unusual too. Usually girls of her age have those little pink nipples, but Mary's were as big and full as some woman's who's had three or four babies. They poked some pretty noticeable indentations in her shirts. And they really gave your mouth a lot to play with.
"Though her boobs were big, her figure was slim everywhere else, except for her big butt and a little bulge at her belly. And she had no, absolutely no pubic hair on her mound. Which was really strange-but delightful as well to me.
"And she was a virgin. In fact, she'd just run away from some very strict parents who'd kept her away from boys quite successfully. She'd never petted, and had only been kissed a couple of times. She was fresh but willing, in fact eager, to be unfreshened. She gave off sexual vibrations as soon as she climbed into my car. I caught her staring at my crotch a couple of times. The second time she glanced at my pants must have caught a vision a bit different from the first time, because my own glances at her thighs, revealed to the panties by a supershort miniskirt, and those big, upstanding breasts, had caused my prick to begin hardening beyond my control. This chick was a prize and I had to have her.
"Well, after a little dope had drifted down our lungs, our talk soon turned to sexual matters, and I was soon asking her some very personal questions. It was then that I found out about her virginity. I took a chance and told her about my own proclivities-my desire for virgins and the peculiar reason why I desired that kind of woman. She dug it.
"That first time we had our clothes off in about fifteen seconds, and she looked up into my face with those big, brown eyes, framed by her short, but stylishly cut dark brown hair, wondering what I was going to do first. I decided to be bold.
"I picked her up in my arms, and carried her, giggling, to my big king-size bed. I threw her down, dove onto the bed, spread her thighs briskly with my hands around her ankles, and put my mouth straight on that indescribably cute, hairless twat. I took about five or six long swipes all the way up to her clit from her asshole. Then I started teasing three different areas of her individually.
"I started off with her asshole, really dug my tongue tip deeply in there, poking and searching around for a full five minutes. She was squirming like a puppy. With a good grip on her thighs to keep her from squirming out of range, I moved up further and delved into the recesses of her cunt, starting with the smooth outer lips, working into the moisture of the inner ones, and then letting my tongue work like a wet, miniature cock between her moistening walls. My tongue swirled around and around with abandon and her hips began a responsive circular motion in the opposite direction, a circular motion that became wilder and wilder with each moment.
"As she seemed to be reaching her peak, I suddenly shifted upward to her clit, and let my tongue dance circles around it. Then I took the little organ between my tightened lips and pulled on it a few times, the yanks causing her to groan loudly each time. She was gripping the back of my head with her hands and her fingers were really starting to dig in. This was going to be her first orgasm-except for masturbating, that is-and it was obviously going to be a very heavy experience for her.
"Finally, I just let my tongue strum back and forth as fast as it was able to do until the inevitable conclusion came about. It didn't take long. She came, yelling and twisting about.
" 'Michael, oh this is good. Don't stop, I . . . uh . . . really dig this. It's so . . . uh-uh-uh . . . fucking heavy. Oh shit.. . wow . . . that was really great.'
"I immediately told her where to put that mouth she'd been yelling obscenities with-right on my now-very stiff cock. She went after it with admirable enthusiasm. She was a bit awkward at first, but that was understandable. After a few minutes of her mouth moving all over my cock and balls I didn't care. I got on top of her, keeping my cock buried as deeply as possible in her mouth at all times, and rammed it to the back of her throat. She reacted beautifully, tightening her lips in a satiny grip around my plunging cock. I rammed harder and faster, going out of my mind with ecstasy, until finally with spurt after spurt I shot my load down her throat.
"She licked my cock and balls all over once more in appreciation, and told me how much she loved what we'd just done. She said she couldn't decide whether she'd liked being sucked off better than blowing me. I told her that as soon as my cock got back into working condition I'd give her something else to compare those to.
"In about ten minutes I started in on her again.
First, I kissed her every possible erogenous zone. I licked her ear. I bit at her breasts, pulling the white slopes into my mouth as deeply as I could, strumming her oversize nipples with my tongue, giving her little nips with my teeth on every section of those two fantastically firm set of tits.
"I moved on to many other parts of her body, kissing and licking strange places where no one had ever touched her but herself. I avoided only her cunt and the immediate area around it, to build her sexual tension up to a new high level. Soon she was begging me to put my mouth against her twat. I started at that center piece of her anatomy, tempted to taste the juices that flowed so abundantly from it again, but I resisted, and made her turn onto her front.
"I let her lay flat for a few minutes and let my mouth travel caressingly across her back-shoulder blades, spine, ribs, until I came to where the well-shaped globes of her ass began to rise, and the cleft between them formed.
"I nibbled her flat, pink, healthy asscheeks, getting rougher and rougher until she was moaning, then I stuck out my tongue and allowed it to soothe the red spots that my teeth had caused. Then I moved to the deep valley. Starting at the bottom of her spine, my tongue took a trip downward, licking in a teasing, slow way. Automatically, her butt rose to meet my caresses, making it easier for me to reach my final destination, her nice, clean, pink and hairless asshole. I didn't touch it right away, but let my tongue tip skip it momentarily. I licked the protuberance of flesh between her asshole and vagina, even barely touching the lowest extremities of her cunt lips, where the juice moistened everything.
"I lapped upward with long strokes a half dozen times, transporting some of the cunt fluids to her asshole, which, in the action, I licked for the first time.
"Mary moaned and groaned and writhed against my face as I did this. I was glad she was enjoying my performance. I certainly was. Now her asshole was all wet and slimy with a mixture of my saliva and her cunt juices. I strengthened and curled my tongue so that it took on the properties of a miniature cock, and poked experimentally at the puckered hole. Again and again I probed until some of the tightness began to give way and my hard tongue tip finally began to find refuge where it longed to be.
" 'Uh, oh, uh, yes . . . do it to me,' the young virgin whimpered loudly.
"Finally, I was actually able to embed most of my tongue in her. She was being wonderfully cooperative and intelligent for so young and inexperienced a girl, loosening her anal sphincter so that my teasing tongue could enter. I loved her for it.
"I kept at this for a good five minutes or more, letting one of my hands slip into the groove of her reeking vagina and pulling at my cock with the other. Before long, I had the world's most aching and demanding hard on, or so it seemed, and I knew it was time for the final act. I hoped it wouldn't hurt her too much, and yet I looked forward to inflicting some pain, as I knew this ass-fuck would do to her.
"She was uncertain about what I was up to when I pulled her hips up and moved my loins behind her own. 'Are you . . . are you going to fuck me?' she stuttered.
" 'Not exactly, my dear,' I said in a comforting manner. 'I'm not going to put this big, fat cock in your cherry twat. I'm not the least bit interested in doing that, as I've explained to you. What I am going to do is stick this big sausage up your ass. . . . ' She pulled away a bit, or tried to; I kept my hands firmly locked on her hips. She gasped. 'Don't worry about it. Enjoy it,' I continued. 'It will hurt, but you'll be able to bear it. And before you know it the pain will magically become pleasure, and you'll soon be begging me to feed my giant cock into your little asshole. You'll be pleading for me not to stop.'
" 'But. . . ' she started to interrupt, but before she got more than that one word out of her mouth, I shut her up by pushing half my cock into her wettened asshole. In the same motion, I leaned forward and clasped one of my palms around her mouth, stifling the scream that I'd known would come with my assault on her hole.
"Without mercy, I gathered my strength and rammed another quarter of my burning cock into the resisting aperture. I continued to hold my hand over her mouth, and it's a good thing I did. She acted as if I was killing her.
"After I'd seen if I could place the whole of my seven-incher in her-and I was successful-I began to fuck her in earnest. As soon as I thought she'd quieted down enough, I let go of her mouth and again grasped her hips with both hands, to get better leverage. I really plowed it to her, socked it to her, rammed it to her. I fucked that asshole like a madman. I thought of her innocence, her young age, the way no man had done this before, of her virginity, which-a couple of inches from where my big prick was now imbedded-was still intact. I fucked her ass wildly for several minutes, and throughout these initial strokes she took it all rather impassively, neither trying to escape me or help me, no sounds coming from her lips.
"I tried out every variety of stroke on her invaded ass. After all, I'd had little opportunity to practice fucking in my life, having avoided the regular sort and having few chances to perform this perverse alternative.
"I concentrated a full minute on a series of short, quick strokes with my cock head just within her sphincter. I pushed and pulled only an inch or so. I slipped out a couple of times, but quickly reinserted the bulging crown. I kept at this until I'd mastered it. The sensations were unearthly, for here the pressure on my cock was the greatest, and my cock head was the most sensitive part of my weapon.
"Next I plunged the cock all the way in her once again, causing the first audible response from her in some time-a ragged gasp-and worked on her hole with long, extremely slow strokes for three or four minutes, taking my time and observing the very different pleasures afforded by this particular method. Her tight walls grasped every square inch of my board-hard plunger on its easy-going treks in and out.
"I keep my strokes at approximately the same length next, but speeded them up, so that I was lunging in and out of her with the full six or seven inches available, but doing it like a jack-rabbit might.
"It was at this time that her mood changed. I could tell by the involuntary wiggling of her body, the way she started to shake her hips, and the way her hands clasped at the bedsheets first, and this was followed by proof from her lips-groans and whimperings that began so softly that I wasn't even sure I was hearing them, then growing so loud I began to worry about the neighbors again and wondered if I should put my hand back over her mouth. But I decided to just let her roar; it increased my pleasure to hear her passion well up from within her.
"She started now to buck her hips backward against each of my strokes inward. Every time my cock would go sliding toward her depths her butt would shoot back with a tormented twist. My balls slammed against her cunt with a wet slapping sound. They were aching for relief, aching to unload their store of semen into the girl's intestines.
"It was obvious that the virgin too was reaching the heights of sensual feeling; her body had taken control of her mind, and her mind was probably shocked into a stupor by the amount of pleasure, undreamed of pleasure, that its body could provide. She was twisting and writhing, trembling and crying.
" 'More, more . . . give me more of your cock!' she shouted. 'I've never felt anything like this. I don't want to do anything but . . . oh . . . fuck all my . . . uh . . . uh . . . life. Oh hit me, break my back, piss on me, fuck me, fuck me.'
"I rammed the cock in, with full strokes, using all my strength. Something snapped in the girl's head and she seemed to go completely berserk. She was a wild woman. Completely insane words came from her mouth. Her fingernails tore at her own flesh. Then it was there-she was coming.
"And so was I. As she gyrated with orgasm, I emptied my balls into her asshole, pumping with uncontrollable jerks. Finally, we both collapsed, spent, wasted, totally satisfied.
"We fucked again many times that night-I always used her asshole, of course. The next morning she was sore as hell, but no permanent damage had been done. I asked her to live with me and she accepted.
"We've done a lot of things since that first time. But the most memorable evening was the night I took her cherry from her-broke a virgin's hymen for the first time in my life. This is exactly what happened:
"It was a Saturday night and we'd really been smoking a lot of marijuana, having had some friends over-a teenage couple we'd come to know. Then we diverted ourselves as we often did -by watching dirty movies from my small but carefully selected 8mm collection.
"While we sat in the semi-dark and fondled each other idly, we watched this crazy movie I'd just obtained that afternoon through my source at work. The film had two stars-two girls in their early teens.
"The film began with the girls dressed in typical schoolgirl attire-one in a miniskirt and blouse outfit, the other in sweater and slacks. The one in the miniskirt was a cute, slim redheaded chick who was pretty tall for her thirteen or fourteen years-maybe five feet nine or ten. The other one was towered over by the redhead. She was about the same age, but she was a short, rather dumpy brunette with a huge set of tits and an ass just as prominent. What were obviously a couple of very fat nipples indented her sweater.
"The girls, according to the plot, were in the redhead's bedroom and were going to spend the night together. But if their parents had seen the way they kiss with open mouths when they'd shut the bedroom door, their parents would have never allowed it.
"As they kissed, it became immediately apparent that the redhead was the more dominant of the two teenagers. Her hands roamed the brunette's body with abandon while the brunette shyly held on. Then the slim redhead pushed the dumpy girl down onto her bed and ordered her to strip. (The film was silent but had subtitles.)
The girl obeyed quickly, taking off her slacks first, revealing a pair of hefty but succulent thighs and a thickly covered pubic mound for one so young. Then off came the sweater and a pair of big, floppy tits were in the open air, jiggling about before the redhead's hungry, appreciative eyes.
"Then the redhead did a strip-a much more tantalizing one. She was less clumsy than the brunette, and she took her time more. As the fat brunette watched the other girl's shoes come off, the mini-skirt slowly drop, the blouse being gradually unbuttoned, a brassiere be unhooked and then peeled off, then a sleek pair of netted hose rolled off a beautiful pair of legs, her eyes practically bugged out, her swarthy face got sweaty, and her big, red tongue came out of her mouth time and time again to lick her fat lips.
"She was very excited and so were Mary and I. We were clutching at each other, Mary with her left hand and me with my right, more and more crazily.
"The redhead suddenly leaped on the brunette and their bodies were plastered against each other while the teenage girls traded kisses. The redhead bent her head and teased the brunette's gigantic tits for a while. Then she went straight for her own pleasure-by planting her almost hairless cooz right on the brunette's face. The brunette lapped at the slim girl's slit as if she'd be killed if she didn't dig a hole right through the girl with her tongue. The redhead's head lolled back as ecstasy overcame her, her long, beautiful hair caressing her back.
"But the redhead didn't want to come that way. Instead, she again placed her body atop the fatter girls, this time planting her cunt right on the hairy brunette's. She began to rub the two twats together, getting more and more frantic with each second. The brunette soon caught on and grinded cooperatively. Soon both girls were panting and heaving with passion. They orgasmed with a flurry of insane motions.
"As the screen flashed into white and I got up to turn off the projector, it was damn hard to even move because of the hard on in my pants. When I got back to the couch I relieved that problem by letting my pants drop to the floor, causing my ready cock to spring up before thirteen-year-old Mary's fresh and beautiful face. She instantly sucked it in right up to the balls, the head going down her throat.
"But as I watched her expertly suck off my cock, I realized I was vaguely dissatisfied with the usual sex we had been going through. And an obsession that had recently been haunting me now again grabbed me in its clutches. I wanted to deflower Mary. I wanted to deflower a virgin.
"But I knew my cock would shrivel up inside her cunt-even at the thought of putting it in her cunt. I couldn't help it-it was a psychological liability I'd been raised with. So what was I to do?
"Letting my eyes idly gaze about the room, I came upon the solution. There it was, sitting in a bowl on the table. A banana!
"Pulling my now-stiff-as-possible-cock out of the girl's avid mouth with a loud slurp, I ran over to the table and grasped the fruit in my hand. Mary watched me come back with puzzled but curious eyes. I stood above her with the banana in one hand and looked into her eyes meaningfully. She understood what I was about to do and nodded silently.
"I crouched down to look directly into her cunt. She spread her legs for my convenience. Her cunt was open, pink, dripping. She was as hot as any woman can be. And she was a virgin. I held one end of the banana against the opening, letting just the point of it steal in. I looked up into her eyes again. She was ready, biting her lip. I looked back down and thrust a full half of the fat, yellow fruit into the virginal twat, "Mary cried out deep in her throat but managed to muffle most of the sound by keeping her lips shut tight. I ground the fruit in and out, in and out. Her walls held it snugly, but eventually loosened up some. Her breathing got harder and harder. I pushed the banana in further and further, until finally it was completely buried within her snatch. I fucked her hard with the long, fat fruit then until her hips were heaving and she came with a gurgling sound. Then I put my red, iron-hard cock in her mouth and immediately deposited spurt after spurt of come there.
"So I've deflowered my first virgin, even if it was in a weird way. Maybe some day I'll be able to do it the 'normal, healthy way,' but for now I'm fairly happy with the way I am. Thank goodness there's more than one way to skin a cat."
The neurotic pattern of behavior is so pronounced in Michael J. that the only way one can see for him to re-pattern his life-style and attitudes toward what is right and what is wrong in sexual behavior is to undergo extensive psychotherapy. Failure to do so, and soon, presents not only the potential of eventual psychosis but legal problems as well.