Chapter 8
The Nurse Who Peeps
"As a nurse, I have many opportunities to see nudity in the small and exclusive private sanatorium-hospital where I practice my profession. But I get a strange thrill when I see a naked male or female without their knowing that I watch. I don't have much opportunity to see actual intercourse, but I derive sufficient satisfaction when I see nudity."
-Barbara T., age 39, single.
Barbara T. is a rather intelligent looking woman with good grooming. She has had a good education and is able to obtain medical work with some of the leading physicians. She says that she has had innumerable sexual affairs but this appears to be an exaggeration.
Barbara has made several admissions that when she was young, she found herself attached to another woman and formed a lesbian relationship.
"Her name was Rita and she was a student nurse. She was kind of masculine and had a rather flat chest. Her breasts were small but firm. We shared the same room. Rita was always saying that men were disgusting creatures and it was better to look than to have! At least, there were no repercussions."
(COMMENT: This attitude is found recurring in many compulsive and habitual female peepers. They want to have a vicarious "affair of the eye" without any attachments. It is this immature sexual attitude that warps a normal libidinal fulfillment.)
Barbara says that Rita often oralized her and that she, herself, "played the queer part with the girl" and found it was satisfactory. "After all, I had my 'shots' or my orgasm, if you prefer, and that's all I really care about. But later, when I became a professional, I sort of drifted away from any sex scene.
"A nurse's hours are whacky and it's hard to make dates. I don't think I've ever really cared for men. I may like to look at them and get hot and even masturbate, but I don't have that awful urge to have a man 'spike' me the way lots of girls do."
(COMMENT: Barbara is a latent female homosexual and has strong inhibitions. She cannot unblock her lesbian urges that would then help release her pent up store of normal heterosexual urges.)
As a registered nurse, Barbara often helps patients undress in readiness for examinations.
"If I stand by and see a woman completely undress, the thrill is almost non-existent. But I like to tell a woman to undress behind a screen and wait for the doctor to come out; then I go into an adjoining room and look through a keyhole or else leave the door slightly ajar. If I look at a pair of naked breasts in secret, it gives me quite a sexual thrill."
Although Barbara would dislike having normal coitus, she has a curiousity about seeing naked genitals of the male.
"Most men are shy about undressing in front of a nurse, or even a woman doctor. So, I usually tell the man to wait for the doctor and then I go right out of the room.
"I am able to put the screens in certain positions of the room so that when I peep from my secret hiding place, I can watch the way a man takes off his clothes, right down to his skin."
(PSYCHOSEXUAL ANNOTATION: Many a female peeper derives a bonus lascivious thrill out of seeing a so-called male striptease! She confesses to a strange overall heat of excitement by seeing a man removing his clothes. It is seeing an intimate act that the man would feel embarrassed about if he knew.
It is this attitude that twists and titillates the female peeper-namely, knowing the man would be embarrassed by her peeping.
This gives the female peeper a masculine thrill and a feeling of superiority over the so-called dominant sex. Again, the desire for "psychic castration" is paramount.)
She reports watching one nervous, shy young man who removed his clothes behind the screen. "Seeing his naked buttocks, then as he turned, to see his dark pubic hair, then his rigid phallus and huge testicles, was something good to me.
"Yes, he had an erection. Even when the doctor called him out from behind the screen, the kid had that big erection. He sure was embarrassed. The doctor frowned, then in a few deft motions, he seized the boy's phallus and masturbated him into a towel!"
Barbara received such a sexual stimulation that she says, "I almost erupted, myself. It was one of the few times when I masturbated because of the way the doctor was sliding the boy's prepuce up and down in frantic motions. I never thought I'd see such a thing."
The doctor grunted:
"Boy, you either get yourself to a regular Saturday night whore, or whack it off yourself. I can't have kids with hard rods standing around here."
The boy almost wept from red-faced stammering embarrassment. "I ... I can't ... " He stammered nervously.
"Okay, just let's examine you now," the doctor proceeded on in his routine as if nothing had happened.
The peeping nurse, Barbara says that she would like to see some coitus or other sexual activities but that in a medical hospital, such things are not available.
She also made a pointed remark, "You'd be surprised how many doctors, nurses and even interns, get a peeping jolt out of seeing a naked person who is unaware of it!
"It's just not the same as when you have a naked man or woman in front of you, during an examination or a treatment. There just isn't that much of a thrill."
(DOCTOR'S COMMENT: Many peepers have about the same attitude that it is more sensually thrilling to see nakedness without the awareness or the consent of the person. This creates a feeling of sexual mastery over the other person and a form of emotional superiority.)
In another reported incident, a young nurse was detected for peeping.
CASE STUDY:
Ruby, age 25, newly married, has peeping urge.
Ruby has a normal curiosity about the nude body which marriage should satisfy but there is something amiss in her marital relationships.
"My husband says it's just not 'normal' for a girl to want to play with him or even see him in the nude in bright light. I would think many a husband would give his balls to get a girl to fool or play with him or even (fellatio) but my husband doesn't care for anything but either (active cunnilingus) or (intercourse).
Ruby says that she finds satisfaction during these methods but "I still get a charge when I see a man's (genitalia) and his pubic hair and his (anal gorge). It's something I can't explain."
Ruby worked for a doctor who was a gynecologist; that is, a physician who specialized in female problems.
"There was one woman, about 30, who always came for a vaginal test or something. Now, I looked at the charts and I know she was perfectly healthy. Truth is, I think she just liked to have the doctor poke around her. He would pull apart her labia majora, insert an instrument, pull it in and out and that would get her real excited.
"All the while, the doctor would make believe that he was just examining her and that there was nothing wrong about how her nipples were getting hard, how her eyeballs rolled around, the way she'd moan and groan.
"Then, when he would brush his hands against her clitoris, that was all he needed to do to get her real going.
"After he masturbated her-and that's what he did-he would tell her, 'In perfect health. I'll arrange another appointment for further examination.' It was all part of a trick. It Was done to whack her off and the doctor made a neat twenty dollars out of it."
Ruby would often hide herself in a clothes closet and peep through a crack to see it.
She thrilled to see the way the woman would hug and cup her breasts and pull on her nipples while the doctor made his perfunctory examination and pretended that he was just doing a routine test.
"I liked to see the way she hit the top," says Ruby. "She'd bounce up as if someone had stuck a stick of exploding dynamite in her-"
(COMMENT: While Ruby would peep on the patient, she had her own sexual feelings but for reasons too complicated to discuss here, she did not masturbate or otherwise resort to self-stimulation. But she did not masturbate or otherwise resort to self-stimulation. But she did say that a peeping scene made her so super-sexed, that she could have intercourse with her husband at least three times that night.
(As we have noted, for many persons, voyeurism serves as an unnatural and artificial stimulus, like an aphrodisiac.
The sex problem here is that it frequently becomes habitual and addictive to the point where the female peeper is frigid without this form of stimulation.
We may well put it in the same classified category as spanking or whipping; the sadist uses it to whip up his libido and the masochist needs it to become stimulated. It is an abnormal perversion.)
Then there was the time when the peeping Ruby made a noise in the closet and that led to her apprehension.
The doctor was as infuriated as the naked woman who made foolishly clumsy efforts to hide her pubic mound and her firm and heavy breasts.
"You ... you were in there!" screeched the red-faced woman as she pointed to the closet. "You watched everything ... you little-peeper!! ! "
The doctor was just as enraged.
"Ruby! Of all the nerve! I never expected."
The doctor looked as if he was going to strike the terrified and cowering nurse. "I ought to report you..."
But it was the naked woman who had a lascivious leer on her twisted face. (It might be mentioned that she was in the midst of being stimulated and had not yet received her orgasm. This left her in a state of sexual anxiety and sexual tension which warped her attitudes.)
"Make her ... take her clothes off!"
The doctor had a similar leer on his face. "That'll be your punishment. Strip down, Ruby! Since you like to peep on naked people, then you get yourself naked and a taste of your own perversion. That ll be the best cure for you peepers and perverts!"
"N-no, please, Doctor-, don't ... " She was very embarrassed about having to be naked before others. This is one fear noted amongst the majority of female peepers. They may derive carnal gratification out of seeing other unsuspecting persons naked, but they, themselves have a morbid terror of being so indelicately exposed. "I don't ... "
Her protests fell on deaf ears.
Ruby says, "They both stripped me naked, joked and laughed as they played with my nipples. The woman stuck her fingers into my (anus) while the doctor did it to me in front. I was penetrated from both sides.
"I have to confess that it felt something sensational, having them both penetrate me and make fun of me. But I still felt embarrassed at being naked before them.
"Then the doctor said I was to masturbate."
The doctor offered his bizarre explanation:
"I always tell any anxious parents that if they catch their boys or girls masturbating, force them to do it in front of everyone. That'll cure 'em. That'll cure your peeping, too!"
Ruby almost swooned from the debilitating embarrassment and humiliation.
"I ... I just can't ... "
A slap on her naked buttock cheek made her jump.
"I'll whip you if you don't do as I tell you!" The doctor, clearly, meant business. "Now, start rubbing yourself."
Before the clothed doctor and the naked woman, the peeping nurse had to insert fingers into her vagina and pry apart her genital folds. She masturbated before them. She later said she experienced quite a sexual jolt that may have been embarrassing but somewhat thrilling.
She was later discharged and while it ended her employment with this particular doctor, it did not end her career or her compulsive peeping.
"Now, I find I just can't get away from it!
Being punished and told it was wrong only served to make it worse!! ! "
(COMMENT: When a sex act is punished by compulsory masturbation (which is archaic and a medieval attitude) it only causes rebellion and a desire to continue that taboo sex act.
The peeping nurse is as sexually human as any other female and perhaps the constant exposure to physical environment tends to distort her normal sex image.)