Chapter 11
I don't know how I made it to Bob's, with the blood streaming out of my nose and my clothes in a mess. But when I finally did I staggered up the stairs and rang his bell. I wanted to cry when there was no answer, but instead, I slouched down against the wall and sat in front of his door. I knew he was the only one I could turn to, now. I certainly couldn't go running home like a scared little girl. I couldn't go rushing back to mommie and daddy now and admit I had faded. I was hurt. I needed someone to console me. Every time I thought of Linda and Gil together I wanted to the. I wanted to take a knife and stab it right through my heart. I just couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe everything that had happened. It all became too much for me and I broke into hysterical sobs, again.
I was sitting there, crying hysterically, when Bob came walking up the stairs. He took one look at me and came flying over to me.
"My God, Rosalie! What's wrong?" he asked, kneeling down and holding me close. "What happened to you, for God's sake? Tell me. Are you all right?" His voice was eager ... filled with concern.
"Yes," I sobbed, "I'm all right At least, physically."
"Come on. Let me get you inside," his tone was soft, filled with compassion.
He helped me to my feet and pulled the key from his pocket and unlocked the door and let me into his apartment. He kicked the door closed behind us and led me into the bedroom.
"Here. Lie down, while I get a cold rag and fix you up a little."
I didn't resist. I let him place me on the rumpled bed.
He took my shoes off and then disappeared. He came back in a moment with a wash cloth, dripping with water.
"Here. Sit up," he said, putting his hand behind me and helping me up and then dabbing the cold liquid around my face, wiping away the dried blood from my nose and mouth.
When he'd washed all the blood off he threw the cloth to the side and got up again. Moving to his dresser, he pulled out a white shirt.
"It may not be the best fit, but it sure as hell's better than what you're wearing," he smiled, tenderly.
For the first time I realized that my blouse was ripped to shreds; that I had run through the streets with only my bra covering me. Suddenly, on top of everything else, I was mortified at the thought.
I accepted his help in removing my blouse, or what was left of it and into his shirt. I was glad that for once he wasn't trying to make love; not now, at least
"Come on," he said, "I'll buy you a cup of coffee and you can tell me what's wrong."
"No. I don't want to go out, Bob," I whimpered and threw myself into his arms.
"It'll be all right, baby. I promise. Whatever it is, I'll help you," he said, and squeezed me tight against his warm body.
"Thanks. It's important to me."
"You can count on me, hon. I swear."
"Tell you what," he went on, "I'll fix us a drink. That should help to relax you."
He led me into the living room and sat me on the sofa, where I sat until he fixed two stiff drinks and handed me one.
I lifted the glass and nearly drained it of its contents. "How about it?" he asked, "what's this all about?"
Without hesitation or restraint, I poured out the whole sordid story, breaking into tears now and again. He listened intently, his body tensing as I proceeded. Finally, when I finished, there was a long silence. I didn't know what his reaction would be. I was afraid he would believe the lies that Linda had made up; afraid that he, too, would turn against me. But I was desperate. I needed somebody. And right now, he was my only hope.
Finally, Bob sighed, deeply.
"You're gonna hate me for what I'm gonna tell you," he started, "but now, I guess it all has to come out ... "
"What do you mean," I interrupted.
"Well," he stated, "there's more to it I mean, Linda isn't all that pure. But first, there's something I want you to know ... "
"What do you mean, she isn't pure," I interrupted again. "Tell me what it is, please."
"Well, remember the weekend she was with her sick mother?" I nodded. "She wasn't," he continued, "Where was she?" I asked.
"With me," he said simply. "That call wasn't from her father; it was from me. Her folks were away for the weekend and we planned it all out In fact, we had planned it a couple of weeks before that We-she and I-spent the weekend at her folks" place ... "
There was a long silence before he continued ... "She even put me up to you. She told me that you weren't broken and that I should take you. I liked the idea, so I did."
"But why?" I asked.
"What do you mean?"
"That first night we were together ... " I started, hesitantly, " ... you didn't seem to care, yet you did ... "
"Ros ... I didn't know you. Then, you were just another girl. I didn't want to hurt you be getting involved and then having to drop you if I didn't like what I learned about you."
"And now?"
"Now ... it's different ... " ... "Do you still want Gil?" he asked, feeling beginning to sound in his voice.
"Yes ... Yes, I do," I assured him.
"Then ... I'll fix it," he said, and turned to the telephone.
I sat there numbly, listening to the half conversation from other end until he hung up. I waited.
"You can go home, now, if you like," he said. I'll drive you ... "
When I walked into the apartment, Gil and Linda were sitting next, to each other on the sofa. Linda looked smug when she saw me; Gil looked confused.
"You've got your nerve!" Linda snapped.
"Shut up!" Gil spat. Linda turned to him, questioningly.
"You're gonna take her side, now?" Linda sneered. "After what you know?" she went on.
"Linda, we have some things to talk about like adults. And your idea of talking things out is a little different than mine. It seems that you told me what you wanted me to hear instead of the truth."
"You mean you don't believe me?" she asked, surprised.
"I mean you twisted the facts. That's what I mean."
"I don't understand," she said, defensively.
"That call a while ago," he said, "wasn't just a buddy looking for me ... it was Bob. He told me about your sick mother and your love-in weekend with him. He even told me how you egged him onto Ros."
The look on Linda's face told me she was stunned.
"And the funny story about Ros seducing you," Gil went on, "I should have seen through that, too."
"But ... "
"But ... nothing," he interrupted her. "We're through, Lyn. Finished. Done."
"But Gil ... "
"Shut up, Linda! I don't want to hear any more of your lies," he said to her, his voice cold and hard.
Gil looked across to me and our eyes met and held. I knew what they were saying to me. They were telling me that he was mine. What I wanted so desperately only a few hours ago was now mine. But something held me motionless. Our eyes held, silent words passing back and forth, between us.
Linda sat there, slumped next to him. She was the loser now. She was out in the cold. She couldn't lie any more. Her face was tense, and I could tell she was holding back the tears.
"Ros ... " Gil's voice broke into my own thoughts.
"Yes?" I asked, softly.
"Want me to help you pack? You can stay at my place until we decide a hat to do now," he went on.
And then it happened. Suddenly all my doubts, my questions, my fears were gone. My mind was cleared of dreams and wishes. I knew what had to be done. I got up from my seat and faced the two of them, confidently.
"No," I said. "Why don't you stay here. I can manage for myself," I concluded, starting to turn away.
"Where will you go?" He sounded sincere.
"Does it really matter to you, Gil?" I asked. "Does it really? Are you afraid of losing me, now, or just afraid of losing a bed partner?" I asked.
He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out Linda, too, was speechless.
"I wanted you, Gil," I went on, "I really did. I tried to get you without hurting Linda, but it didn't work out that way. And perhaps it's best. I think that perhaps the two of you were meant for each other, after all."
"What ... ?" he said, stretching out the word.
"Gil, if you really cared for me, you wouldn't have taken her word for everything. You would at least have given me a chance to explain my side of the story."'
"Wait a minute ... !" he said, trying to defend himself.
"No more waiting, Gil. No more sneaking. I lost and now I can face the fact. You lost. Linda lost. And the two best losers should have something ... they should have each other ... "
Without saying anything further, I turned toward the door. Neither of them said a word as I closed it and walked down the sidewalk.
As I headed toward the corner, my head staring at the concrete in front of me, I heard him ...
"Ros, honey ... "
I turned my gaze toward the convertible gliding slowly along the curb beside me. It was Bob.
"Oh Bob ... " I sobbed. "Oh, Bob ... "
"Ros ... come home with me ... will you ... darling?"
"Yes ... yes ... " AT last, finally, I knew what I really wanted-wanted all along.