Chapter 10
The sun filled the room. It was bright and cheerful, but my mood was glum. As I opened my eyes, the first thing in my head was last night with Linda. I didn't know how I was going to face her. I didn't know what kind of change this would make in our relationship. I didn't know what she would expect. But I knew one thing, and that was for damned sure: it would never happen again. It wasn't my scene. I was sorry for her, but there was only so much a person could do. I would be willing to be her friend; willing to help her as much as I could. Even after she and Gill were finished. I really didn't want to hurt Linda at all. That wasn't my purpose.
Slowly I twisted in the bed until I was on my back; my eyes closed. And then, girding up all the courage I had, I turned toward her side of the bed and opened my eyes. But she wasn't mere. I sighed with relief and jumped from the bed, quickly reaching for a robe.
The bedroom door was open and there wasn't a sound coming from the apartment, anywhere. I was grateful, relieved, that perhaps Linda wasn't even here. Perhaps she had already gone out.
I glanced at the clock: twelve-twenty. I was really exhausted to have slept this late. I headed for the bathroom to clean up and tried, desperately, to get my thoughts organized before she returned.
I had dressed and had breakfast and started straightening out the apartment It had become a real mess in the last few days. I was happy as I cleaned, humming to myself, thinking of the day I'd be doing it for Gill; thinking of the day I'd be doing it for his children.
I pulled the blind and let the sun fill the room. After I had cleaned every thing there was, I began re-arranging the furniture.
After the apartment was finished, I stepped back and admired my work. It looked real cute. Real homey. Nothing like the place we had-rented, at all. I was tempted to call Gil. I was tempted to call Gil over to see what I had done, but I knew that was wrong.
I went back into the bedroom and glanced at the clock again. It was almost five. I had been cleaning all day long. Suddenly I wondered where Linda was, but decided not to worry about it. I'd find out when she got back.
Suddenly, the door burst open and Linda came bouncing in, all full of smiles. She looked at me but didn't say a word, just sort of a stare, which went right through me.
"Hi," I said, cautiously, not knowing what to expect after last night.
"Hello," she said, her tone dripping frigidity.
"What's new?" I asked, fishing around for more information.
"Not much," she said, her voice notably filled with hostility.
"What's wrong with you?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said, again.
"Where have you been all day?"
"None of your goddamned business."
I couldn't understand what was wrong with her. I couldn't understand why she was being so rotten.
"Look, Linda. If you're upset about last night, we can just forget it"
"Forget what?" She spun on her heels to face me.
"You know what I'm talking about."
"No, I don't. Why don't you tell me, Rosalie."
"Well, what happened between you and I last night."
"What happened? Suppose you tell me about it?"
"Come on, Linda. Don't play games with me. I know damned well you didn't forget it. Don't play dumb."
"I didn't forget it. Not one little detail of how you seduced me. You freak!"
"What!" I screamed.
"You heard me," she snarled.
"You gotta be nuts. You really do, Linda."
"I wouldn't talk about being nuts if I were you!" she snapped and spun toward the bedroom and stomped away.
I was furious. I was in a rage. I wanted to take something and smash it over her head. How dare she. I wouldn't have minded d she felt badly about it I wouldn't have minded had she been upset. I could understand that. But to blame it on me was too much.
I went running into the bedroom after he. "What the hell are you talking about, Linda," I screamed.
"Just that. I've said all I had to say. Now I'm packing."
"Packing?" I asked, questioningly.
"That's right! I'm moving in with Gil until you can find yourself an apartment."
Then it hit me. Suddenly I realized what was happening. Suddenly I realized that this two-timing, phony bitch was trying to pull of a dandy.
"You're moving in where?" My words were calm ... cool.
"That's right, Rosalie. You heard me correctly. I'm moving in with Gil. Me and him, together. That sort of lets you out, now, doesn't it?"
"You bastard!" I screamed and ran at her. I grabbed hold of her hair and yanked as hard as I could, pulling her backward from the dresser and sending her sprawling on the floor.
"You little bitch! Stay away from me!" she screamed. I'll kill you! I swear to God I will, Linda. You lying bastard."
I saw stars and I charged for her form, letting go with everything I had; smashing out at the air, striking her anywhere I could.
She was screaming. "Stop it! Stop it!"
"I won't stop until you tell the truth," I yelled back, slapping her over and over. Her arms came up and crossed over her face for protection, but that didn't stop me. I struck at her breasts, her stomach, her ass-anywhere I could hit her.
Suddenly Linda rolled over and jumped to her feet.
"Okay, if you wanna play that way, I can play too," she said and picked up the clock-radio from the dresser and flung it, hard ... straight at me.
I ducked out of the way and it smashed into a thousand little pieces against the wall.
When I looked again, Linda had a heavy crystal ashtray flying through the air.
Again she missed me, and I took this opportunity to charge in at her, tackling her like a football dummy.
This time she fought back, grabbing for my hair and yanking as hard as she could. She started letting go with slaps of her own that landed hard on my face.
I reached out, grabbing onto her blouse and yanked as hard as I could. The material ripped and opened. I reached again, trying to get her throat, closed my fingers around it, squeezed it as hard as I could. Her own hands came up and long sharp fingernails dug into my arms until I let go in agony.
I turned just in the nick of time to avoid her knee in my crotch and let go with a backhand of my own that connected and sent her sprawling across the bed.
"Are you going to tell the truth, you little creep?" I screamed, grabbing hold of her hair and yanking her backward as she tried to get up.
"I did. I told the truth!" she screamed. "I told it right down to the very last detail. Just the way you went down on me. I told it all to Gil! Told him how you forced me to do it!"
"You told him what? You told Gill all of that?" I screamed. "You bastard. You bastard!" I repeated over and over. I felt the venom rising up inside of me. I felt it taking over. I wanted to kill her; wanted to see her lying on the floor in a pool of blood, dying slowly. I wanted to step on her, spit on her. She was no good. I tried to protect her feelings, tried to make it easier on her. I snuck around behind her back so she wouldn't feel badly, be hurt, and this is how she repaid me. "And what did Gill say?" I yelled.
"He told me I better get away from you. I better move in with him, if that's how it was."
"The two of you are bastards! The two of you deserve each other," I yelled, tears welling up in my eyes and streaming down my face. Linda jumped to her feet and went running for the door.
"Oh, no you don't," I screamed. "You're not going to go running back to him and tell him I started this!"
I charged for her again and caught up with her in the living room, pushing her as hard as I could. She fell backward over a chair and landed on the floor.
"I'm warning you," I said, trying to gain control of myself ... of my voice. "I'm giving you this one chance to come clean and tell Gil the truth. 'Cause if you don't, I swear, you'll be the sorriest girl who ever lived!"
"Don't threaten me," she said. "I got what's important. I got Gil and that's all I care about."
"You don't care about him." I was snarling. "You only care about yourself; about what he can do for you, about his cock. That's as far as your concern goes."
"And I suppose you're better, Little Miss Prim."
"Yeah, I am!" I countered. "You didn't like it when I was a virgin. You didn't like it when I was waiting for the right person to come along. You were jealous because you were nothing more than a whore, putting out for anybody and everyone who came along!"
"Is that so!"
"Yeah, that's so! And we both know it, Linda."
"I'm afraid now you're gonna have to go out and find your own boyfriend now that mine isn't available any more."
"That's what you think," I said. "Hove Gil and Gill loves me in a way that he could never love you. I never wanted to hurt you, Linda, that's why the two of us snuck around your back. It was finished between you and Gil before you left for that weekend at home. It was him who came after me; not the other way around."
"I don't believe you, you slut!" she yelled.
"Believe what you want. But I'll tell you. I'm not about to give Gil up so easily."
"I'm afraid you have no choice."
"We'll see about that. I'm gonna get to him and make sure he knows the truth."
"Let me tell you something, Rosalie. When it comes to acting, I'm a pretty good actress. And Gill believes everything I said. So don't get any smart ideas."
"What do you want him for?" I sobbed. "You can't make him happy. And he can't make you happy. What do you want to ruin two lives for?"
"Oh, dear!" she said, sarcastically. "Little Miss Prim can't have her own way. And look how upset she gets!"
"Knock it off Linda," I warned.
"Or what's gonna happen?"
"I'm gonna knock some of those phony caps of yours right down your cock-sucking throat. That's what's gonna happen!"
"Don't push me, Rosalie," she said, her courage mounting.
"Don't you push me, either. Now get on the phone and call Gil and tell him the truth!"
"Are you serious?" she laughed. "Yes. I'm serious," I said. "Now do it!"
"Never happen!"
"I'm warning you, Linda."
"Warn all you want!"
"Now! Do it now!"
"No!" She was firm
"Okay, then. I guess I'm gonna have to make you."
The room fell into silence as she prepared for my attack. "Stay away from me, Rosalie. Just stay away!"
"Are you gonna call?"
"No!"
"You asked for it," I said, running at her again and catching hold of her hair.
"Let go! Stop it!" she cried out as I pulled with all my might. Her own hands flew to her head and she tried to release her hair from my grip. But I was a wild woman and had the strength of three people. As I yanked on her hair with one hand I punched randomly at her body with the other.
She let go of her own hair and began scratching ... biting, kicking. And the two of us were really at it, this time. Hands, arms, legs, flying in every direction.
She knocked my feet out from under me with her foot and I landed with a thud on the hard floor. She tried to run away, but I grabbed hold of her ankle and pulled her down with me, quickly pinning her to the floor with my own body weight.
Suddenly, as if she were a super-woman, she threw me off her body, and leaped on top of me. She was in the vantage point, now. She was pinning me to the floor and unmercifully her hands struck out at my face. I felt the blood starting to run from my nose and went blind with rage. I tugged as hard as I could on my arms, pulling them out from under her and then dug in with my own hands into her flesh.
She screamed out in agony and leaped from me.
"Are you ready to talk now ? Are you ready to tell the truth?"
"Never! I'm just going to use this against you. I'm gonna tell Gil you found out and wanted me to stay with you and when I told you I was going back to him you flew into a rage and beat up on me. How's that for strengthening my story?"
"I hate you!" I screamed. "I hate you" I never met anyone so sick in all my life. It'll never last between you and Gil. It could never work out. He could never love a person as dishonest and disloyal as you are. It couldn't ever be between the two of you. Why don't you let Gill and I be happy, for God's sake? Why don't you let the two of us love each other in peace?" I screamed at the top of my lungs.
"Because I want him!" she yelled.
"But to you he's just another person to go to bed with. You'll hurt him," I kept screaming.
"I don't care about him," she yelled back at me. "I care about me! No one walks out on me! You got that, Rosalie? No one! I don't care if you get hurt or if he gets hurt. I'm sticking to my story. And when I'm ready to let him go, then, and only then, will I let him walk out. Got it?" she screamed.
I flew into her again. I wanted to kill her. I was banging her head against the wall, when, suddenly, the door burst open and Gil came running into the room.
Immediately he came running across the room and pulled me from Linda.
I looked from Linda to Gil and our eyes met and held for an instant. But then, I couldn't tolerate it; couldn't stand being in the same room with the two of them after what Linda had said. I had to be away from them. The two of them could kill me. The two of them had hurt me so much I didn't want to live.
I turned and ran as fast as I could from the apartment I realized I was only strengthening Linda's story. But I didn't care. I couldn't think right now.