Chapter 7

Glenda S.'s story of sexual involvement with animals began when she was but a teenager. Her life at that time, and because of one traumatic night, a twist that would direct her actions until the time of this interview when she was nineteen years of age.

It is not because of her looks that Glenda is a loner. She is tall with golden blond hair and a striking body. Her blue eyes light up with a lively air when she speaks of things she loves and then smolder into a darkness when she remembers those things which cause her pain. During the time I sat with her, taping this interview, I found within this young girl a strong potential for success. I did not believe, upon leaving her, that she was destined to spend the remainder of her days alone.

Born and raised on a small farm in Northern California, Glenda left home when she was fourteen. The reasons for her departure, and the ensuing love she found for animals, will be revealed in her own words. This statement provides us with a concise case where sexual trauma can affect a human being and change the course of their life.

I lived with my mother and stepfather in our small house on the farm. We never saw other people because we were so far from the nearest town. My mother is a good woman, but when my real father left her, she married Jack. Jack was a bastard, and I knew of things that he did to my mother, like cheating on her, that I could never bear to tell her. I guess what I have become is a result of what Jack did to me one hot, summer night. That was the night before I left home.

I was fourteen at the time, and my body was really starting to bloom. I was pretty happy with my looks, and knew that I would have large, full breasts and good legs. I figured that because of that, and with a little education, I would be able to make some kind of living on my own and leave that place. That night was at the end of summer, and it was very hot. Mom and Jack had gone out dancing and drinking, you know, and I figured they wouldn't be home until much later. There was this boy named Eddie who really liked me, and I liked him. We made plans for him to come over after my parents had left.

When he got to the house, they were gone. We sat and talked for a while, then listened to records. During a Johnny Mathis song, he leaned over and began kissing me. I had been kissed before, but never like that. He put his tongue inside my mouth and circled around in there, you know, kind of touching me everywhere. I was feeling very strange, afraid I guess, and he told me to 'just relax.' Then he began touching me. He put his hand on my breast and kind of pushed himself up against me. I could, uh, feel his hardness beneath his pants and that really got me kind of interested. I mean, I knew what boys had down there, but had never seen it or touched it. I suppose at the time I was kind on innocently curious ... as most girls are.

"Do you like them?" I asked him as he stroked my tits.

"I'd like to see them ... please?"

I guess I blushed. I unbuttoned my blouse and let him slide it off my shoulders. He was real gentle, and I really trusted him. I didn't want to fuck, at least not so soon, but on the other hand, I certainly wanted to go farther than just kissing.

"Take off your bra."

"Alright, but just for a little while." He couldn't unsnap the hook, so I reached behind me and undid it. The straps fell back and the material kind of just hung there on my breasts. They were large and even and I could support any kind of dress or bra on them. When Eddie pulled the white lace off, I felt a chill go through me like I was shooting up off the couch. Just having him sitting there staring at my breasts really gave me a thrill.

"They're beautiful!" His voice was choked, and he was breathing heavily. Every time he moved, I managed to sneak a look towards his groin where he bulged out like crazy.

"Kiss them, Eddie..."

He put his mouth to them, kissing and biting my nipples. They began aching, and I had to push his head into me so that the ache wasn't so bad. He played with my tits for a while, then asked me if I wanted to take off the rest of my clothes.

"Promise you won't do anything, I mean ... you know?"

He promised and I believed him. While he sat on the couch, I stood up and pulled off my jeans. All I wore then were my panties, and I knew he could see my hair, you know, through them. They were pretty sheer.

"Now you ... I want to see you, too."

Now Eddie stood up. I watched closely as he tugged off his clothes. When he got down to his underwear, I felt myself growing very excited. He managed to pull the band over his penis, and the thing was hard and huge and straight I gasped when it bounced out from his belly and pointed straight at me.

"It's really big, Eddie!" I exclaimed, staring like a dumb child.

"Take off your panties..."

I pulled down the white panties and stepped out of them. When the warmth of the evening hit my pussy, I shivered. It was something else to be standing there, completely naked and with an excited man right there across from me.

"Could I touch it?" I asked him, wanting desperately to feel his prick. Eddie nodded eagerly and stepped towards me. I reached out and put one finger along the staff, about right in the middle of the length.

"It feels like cement!"

Eddie laughed and I felt like a stupid kid who didn't know anything.

"It gets that way when I'm excited. Do you know where it Goes?"

I had a vague idea, and I had even fingered myself once or twice to find out. My vagina, where I placed my finger, used to get real wet and juicy. Now, as I began stroking Eddie it was getting that way again.

"It goes in here." He had his hand up between my thighs, and his fingers were pulling apart my lips. I felt like I would faint as he slid one finger up inside, then another. But all this time, I was pulling on his cock. I felt his prick begin to throb and he began to shake.

"I'm sorry, Glenda ..." His semen was shooting out of his prick and landing on my belly. It was kind of exciting watching him come like that, and I was learning a lot about what happened.

I told him it was all right and he seemed really relieved about it. I dug the whole thing, watching his prick shudder and knowing I had turned him on like that. I was beginning to feel like a woman, and the feeling was good.

It was getting late that night, and I told Eddie that he would have to leave. We made plans to see each other the next day and do some more 'exploring' as we were calling it then. We kissed long and hard, and I felt like I was falling in love or something. But that would be the last time I ever saw Eddie. I didn't think it would ever end as I went back into my bedroom and crawled into bed naked.

I fell asleep after masturbating myself for a while. I had managed to get two fingers inside, and was feeling real fine. By the time I got myself real exhausted, it was late and I fell asleep, dreaming about Eddie and his hard, pink rod standing out there like it had earlier that night.

I didn't hear Jack when he first came in. When I finally awoke, he was crawling into the bed next to me, his breath smelling of foul whiskey and his prick hard as a rock.

"Shut up and don't say a fucking word, you little whore!"

I was shaking I was so afraid. He had his hand over my mouth. He was naked, and his cock seemed huge, like twice the size of Eddie's. Then I began feeling like I was falling into some kind of nightmare. Everything began swimming around me.

"I'm going to fuck you like you've never been fucked before, little girl! After me, there won't be a bastard in the world who could give it to you!!!"

Then he grabbed my legs and tore them apart. I was underneath him and could feel the hot tip of his cock searching around for my opening. He found it, and with one, terrifying plunge, he threw himself inside. It felt like my entire body was splitting apart, like a split was running up my back and through my skull. He pumped and lunged inside until he finally shot his load. Then he rolled his fucking body off me, got dressed and left the room.

It was a daze. I mean, there was no way I could tell who I was or what I was doing. I didn't remember Eddie or anything about what had happened before Jack had stuck his huge, fucking prick inside me. I felt like some other person, like there was nothing left of me, either inside or in my body. I decided to leave because there was no way I could face my mother and I figured if I saw Jack again, I would probably kill him.

I hit the road at dawn, and started hitching my way towards San Francisco. This guy in a pickup truck stopped and picked me up. I could tell what he wanted, and what he thought he was going to get. It was like overnight I had changed into another kind of person, suspecting everyone for wanting the worst. We drove in silence for a couple of minutes, then he turned towards me and smiled.

"Want to go all the way in?"

I told him that I did.

"Well, it's pretty far out of my way, you know."

I knew it was coming and had to make a decision. I really didn't care about this time, and was ready for anything. I smiled as coyly as I knew how, and lifted up my sweater. I hadn't bothered to put on a bra, and I gave him a good view of my breasts.

"Well, well, that's much better. Now, I think I can make the drive."

That sounded pretty good, but then another thought crossed my mind. I had left my home without money, and was flat broke. I figured that I could probably get something out of him if I played with him a little.

"For a little money, mister, I'll make that ride worth while."

"I've got a hundred dollars I'm willing to part with if you show me a good time."

That was more than I expected. I waited until he had fished the money out of his pocket, then began undressing. When I was naked, I let his eyes roam Over my body. He seemed real pleased by me, and I could see that he was sexually excited. "You've got one terror of a body, little girl, come over here and let me see more."

I scooted across the seat and pushed myself up against him. Then, I threw my leg on the dashboard and gave him a good shot of my cunt. He put his hand there and began rubbing me. I groaned and moaned, trying to pretend that it felt good, but all the time thinking of Jack and his hairy prick.

"Get my thing out, baby, and I'll show you what it's about!"

I unzipped his pants and felt around in there until I had his hard staff in my hand. I pulled it out and examined the red, swollen tip.

"You're so big, mister, I've never seen anything like you!"

"That's my girl!!!"

He was really happy as I stroked and fondled his nuts, then rode my hand up and down his prick, exclaiming my admiration for his tool. Then, I leaned down and put my mouth to it. I had never done this before and really didn't know how to blow him. All I did was to put my mouth around him, and move up and down on him. He came really quickly, and shot his stuff into my throat. I thought I would gag to death as that stuff kept pouring into my mouth.

"Take it all, baby, take everything I can give you..."

I tried real hard, and when he was done, he seemed real happy about my performance. He continued to touch me, and began putting his finger inside me. I was getting turned on by him, but at the same time, I kept thinking about what had happened the night before. The revulsion I felt was too much, so it didn't last too long. We drove on into San Francisco, I sitting naked and allowing him to paw me all the way. Finally, he dropped me off downtown and I was alone with one hundred dollars in my pockets.

San Francisco was empty. It seemed like everyone had taken off some place. I was pretty scared, figuring that if some rapist didn't get me, then the police would. I walked the streets for hours, then ran into a guy named Frank Funk. That was what he called himself.

Frank Funk lived in a small apartment near Golden Gate Park with his dog, Mutt. He was kind of a strange guy and didn't seem at all interested in me as a sexual object. I mean, he took me to his place and went to sleep, telling me that I could sleep either on the couch or in the bed with him. Before he went to bed, he walked around naked for a while, but never got hard or made a pass at me. Finally, I decided to sleep with him and crawled naked into bed beside him.

But we slept. And that was all we did. He didn't try and touch me or anything. There was nothing happening and he seemed content to just sleep. I'll tell you, I was relieved and happy for about the first time in weeks. I felt like I had finally met someone I liked.

The next day, Frank took off for work. I think he worked down by the wharf or something, but he didn't say exactly. I stayed inside the apartment because outside it was raining and cold. Mutt and I were left alone together and this was to be the first time I would ever make it with an animal.

I was walking around in the nude, examining myself in the mirror and figuring that I could make a good living as a whore. My breasts seemed to get larger every day, and my cunt really looked inviting. I knew there would be a good market for me, all I had to do was figure out how to find it. - At one point, I had my leg propped up on a chair and I was looking up my own twat. I was pulling my lips apart and starting to get real turned on when up came Mutt. He walked right between my legs and began sniffing around my cunt. Then, he put his cold nose up there and I felt a great shiver run down my spine.

I was half scared and half egging him on. He was a friendly dog, and we had liked each other immediately. Now, Mutt was licking my crack, and his tongue was going in further each time. I held on to the chair and pulled his head tighter against my cunt. I wanted his tongue all the way inside me, and I opened myself so that maybe he could get there. But I guess, as I look back now, it was my clit that he was touching and licking. And, my orgasm was great because of that. I mean, my body exploded and that fucking dog kept after me until it was all over.

I sensed that he knew what he was doing, and looked forward to making it again with him.

About an hour after the dog ate me out, I took him onto the bed with me. I began playing with his cock, trying to get it hard and kind of see what would happen. I had no idea about exactly what I was going to do, but I knew I wanted to do something with him.

Well, the dog's cock began to grow as I played with it. While this was happening, he was licking my nipples and really beginning to make me ache all over. When he was hard, black and smooth, I knelt underneath him and put my mouth to him. I thought this kind of strange, but for some reason, I was losing all my inhibitions about what was right or wrong.

The more I sucked on the dog, the more excited he got. He was kind of humping me right there, in my mouth and everything, and I decided that I wanted to try and get him between my legs.

I twisted myself underneath him and threw my legs up over his back. He licked my tits for a while, then kind of naturally began searching for my hole with his prick. I reached under him and took the huge prong, placing it right at the opening of my vagina. Well, that fucking dog just rammed inside me, squeezing that knot of his right through my lips and jarring me right out of sight.

Mutt humped me for a good fifteen minutes before he finally came. I was also on the verge, but didn't make it ... at least that time. After he was finished, he tried to pull out but that bump in the middle of his prick kept him inside me. I thought I would die or something because it seemed like we would be trapped like that for hours. Frank wasn't due home for another five hours, and I couldn't imagine this dog's prick inside me for that long. No way!

But finally his hard on grew soft and he was able to pull out. I was really relieved and began kissing him all over the place. When I put my lips back on his prick, it began to grow again. I quickly withdrew my mouth and let him eat me out until I came in a flood of emotions. It was the happiest sex I had ever had.

It was strange as I sat naked with that dog. I tried to put myself into a mood where I would be ashamed of what I had done. I mean, making it with a dog and everything seemed like the most unnatural thing anyone could ever do. But things just didn't seem to make any more difference to me. I looked back and remembered the rules and ethics my parents had taught me, and then looked back once again to that night when my step-father raped me. It didn't add up, I mean, all their talk and false values and everything. They were telling me one thing while all the time that bastard was planning to get inside me! No, I even began to feel that making it with the dog was the best thing I could do. I mean, that animal had never done anything to me, and I figured that he wouldn't either.

I spent the entire afternoon thinking about this and when Frank finally came back, I was in a pretty strange mood. He was happy that I had stayed, and began cooking some dinner for both of us. As we ate, I tried to feel him out on what was bothering me.

"Frank" I said, really scared, "what do you think of people and animals?"

He laughed, forking in a mouthful of food, "I think they go well together."

'No, I mean in other ways .. . you know, when say, a girl and a dog. .."

"You mean you fucked with old Mutt?"

He was laughing like crazy, thinking it was the funniest thing he had ever heard. But instead of getting angry, I felt better about it then I had before.

"C'mon Glenda, tell me, have you made it with my dog?"

"Yes ... I even put my mouth to his, uh, you know..."

"Prick?"

"Yeah, that's where I put it."

"Well baby," said Frank, getting serious, "there's nothing wrong with that. I mean, people do that kind of thing all the time and they don't burn on the streets for it. Know what I mean?"

He was good about the whole thing, and made me feel better. After dinner, I felt like sucking him off. I guess the reason I suddenly wanted to do something for him was because of the fact that he didn't put me down for what I had done with the dog.

He was in the shower and I came into the bathroom. I pulled back the curtain, and looked at his naked body with his cock hanging there.

"Let me wash it for you."

"Alright, but watch out 'cause you're dealing with high explosives."

I took the soap, lathered it up, and began washing down his prick. The more I touched it, the larger it got. It grew until it was sticking out towards me. I then began jacking him off, pulling easily on his large, erect meat.

"Hurry" he said, his breath growing shorter, "put your mouth on it.. . blow me!"

I got into the tub with the water running down my back and seeping along the crack in my ass. I took his prick, looked at it for a second, then wrapped my mouth around it. It tasted like soap, and was slimy and sticky like a snake. I licked and sucked on it, and he kept pushing my head further onto his cock, trying, I think, to get me to swallow the whole thing.

"Suck it, baby, suck it all the way!!!"

I reached around the back of him and put my fingers up his asshole. He clenched me like maybe he was going to fall, but managed to stand upright. Then, he came. It was like a flood or something and I had to spit some of it out into the tub. He seemed to never stop, but just kept shooting that stuff out and all over me. Finally, he shuddered one last time and was through.

"Oh, baby, that was great!"

He stood me up next to him and ran his hands all over my body. He pinched my nipples and rubbed my wet cunt. Then he lowered himself onto the floor and buried his head between my legs. I put one leg onto the side of the tub, and Frank dipped his tongue into my crack. He found my clit and began circling it with the tip of his tongue, then jammed aside my lips and went even further inside. He was lapping up my juices while I pulled his head towards my cunt, trying to get him to go even deeper.

"Oh God" I screamed as I felt myself begin to come, "suck me ... get inside ... lick me!!!"

As my vagina began pulsating and throbbing with the force of my orgasm, I practically drowned him in my juices. I wrapped my legs around his head, still trying to get his mouth even further inside me. It was a glorious experience, and he did his thing well.

Frank and I began fucking all the time. We would ball maybe two, three times a day. When he went to work, I would either jack off Mutt or blow him, just to stay friends with him. I guess I still didn't trust Frank, and wanted to make sure that there was still someone, even if it was a dog, who I could trust.

Then one day, Frank left. He didn't say much, just called from work and told me that he had to go. I didn't understand why, and begged him to stay. But he said there was really no chance.

I found out later that he had a wife and two kids, and had decided to go back to them.

Well, that was the end of my normal sex life. Frank was probably the only man who I could have made it with for any extended period of time and now, he was gone. I sat alone in that apartment until the money ran out, making love with Mutt and trying to figure out what to do. It wasn't difficult to realize that the only way I could support myself was to become a whore. That very night, I started walking the streets, giving head to guys in alleyways and sometimes going to motel rooms with them. I was young and pretty with a wild body and it was easy for me to make a score.

Since that time, I have lived with Mutt. My only real sexual release is with that dog. Whenever I'm with a man, I tighten up and seem to relive that night with Jack. I suppose that someday it will work itself out of my mind. I hope so because I know that I cannot continue to live the way I have been for the last couple of years. I really don't want to spend the rest of my life this way, and for that reason I think that someday it will change.

SUMMARY

Glenda S. is a typical example of how trauma, early in life, can affect the personality and actions of the victim later on and through- out the years. Because of the brutal rape of her stepfather, Glenda could not have sex in the normal way. What is most tragic about her background and that event in particular was the fact that she was just beginning to learn about her own sexuality with Eddie. That sweet, healthy beginning, seemingly entered upon by two young and intelligent people became an obliterated memory after the rape. Everything that she had felt during the time before Jack decomposed into the bitterness and hatred she felt for what probably amounts to all men.

Frank provided her with a release because of his own personal situation. It seems now that he probably was just on a lark, knowing that he had a wife and kids to return home to. This distance allowed Glenda to perform and try and pick up her own sexual growth patterns.

The existence of the dog is another factor in this case which can be directly attributed to the incident with her father. The animal provided the girl with a thwarted sense of her own sexuality while at the same time giving her a sense of security and loyalty which she obviously craved. Her own statement concerning what may have been moral thoughts on her activities reveals the strength with which the rape forced her own attitudes and self-image.

Indeed, Glenda was forced into another world because of one violent and unthinking act on the part of her step-father. But this is not the end for her because she seemed to instinctively under- stand what it is she has to do. She knows that she needs time, time to clear those feelings and prejudices from her mind. Time to establish herself as her own human being and thus to forget the affect of the past. If society allows her to act out her way as a prostitute and animal lover without condemning her into the dungeons of the social outcast, then she does have a fine chance of finding love with a man in her life. If, however, society does throw her literally to the dogs, Glenda will have a fight on her hands that will take every once ounce of strength and courage on her part just to break even.

GENERAL SUMMARY

This book has been dedicated to those who have come to act out one of societies most sacred taboos-bestiality. Their plight is one which will not be accepted within the mainstream, as has homosexuality, for quite some time. But their plight does represent some indication as to what lies ahead, and as to the reasons why this condition exists at all.

There has arisen, through the study of the previous cases, certain patterns which are worth noting. Bestiality is a sexual activity which seems to have some great degree of motivation behind it. Early sexologists declared that persons who engaged in this sexual taboo were only 'degenerate' and nothing more. But as we have seen, the answer is just not that simple.

The occult aspect of bestiality seems to have become a somewhat dominant theme throughout many of the cases. The worship of the animal as the 'devil', or the baser instincts of nature, seems to prevail among many who engage in acts of bestiality as a cathartic exercise. Why this condition exists in the first place may be due to any number of prior elements affecting the sexual personality of the people involved. In most cases, there seems to be a great deal of sexual repression, not so much in action as in mental attitude. Science has shown us that many sexual ailments are the results of mental blocks which the victim may possess. There are many cases of women who are mentally frigid yet engage in hundreds of 'promiscuous' activities. This then, the actions of the individual, do not necessarily indicate the total sexual capability. The mental makeup is certainly of more importance than mere action. Thus, we must search deeper than the act of bestiality to find some kind of answer.

Western Civilization has taught us to believe in a 'Devil', or the free wheeling actions which result from out instincts. There is no argument that a certain social control should be exercised by the individual, and that he should maintain a check of those activities which have the potential of harm towards his fellow man. But in this search for social stability, there also arises the potential of complete repression .. . the stifling of all instinctual behavior. In many cases where this has happened, there develops a cer- tain perverse and distorted worship of anything which has not been so conditioned. In the case of the 'devil cult', where having sex with an animal was the ultimate 'sacrilege' against society, we see evidence of this condition. It is a very unfortunate situation that results in this kind of behavior, but one that, nonetheless, does exist throughout the world.

In simpler examples of bestiality, there arise natural human desires which, because of either early trauma or conditioned repulsion, we see young women turning to animals for friendship and sexual gratification. For many, the guilt factor enters when they have broken through the barriers of their teachings when they originally have sex with a man. Because of the psychic trauma experienced by them at this time, they revert to a self-image of total and complete degeneracy. Instead of looking upon their actions as normal and healthy ones, they have been taught to respect 'people who do those kind of things' as degenerated, amoral and inhuman. Thus, the move from human sexuality to that which involves animals becomes justified in their minds. The loneliness and self-imposed social ostracism which results then provides them with the proper atmosphere in which to begin their life of bestiality.

Another aspect of bestiality, and the conditions which may lead to its practice, exists as a result of the mass media and the saleability of sex. In our culture, many people are affected by the desires and wishes of others. Because of the existence of the mass media, and the tremendous need for entertainment which exists throughout the world, many are involved in sexually taboo acts which may have never crossed their paths. In considering this aspect, however, we must not place too much blame on the mass media. There is within people a certain amount of free will. That is, they do have the choice of rejecting the potential which might be offered to them if, say, they were to be filmed making love to a donkey. On the other hand, the existence of the opportunity does provide them with a situation in which to engage in these kinds of activities.

Our society has become aware of the sexual condition as never before in the history of mankind. Through the eyes of science, and the feelings of our artists, we are beginning to unravel the tremendous web that is human nature. In doing this, we must be prepared to face conditions which may seem uncomfortable and perverse. But because these acts are performed by people throughout the world, their existence must not be relegated to a low rumble of secrecy beneath societies' illuminated layers.

If we can begin to understand the motivations and conditions which strive to promote the relationship between an animal and a human, we might be able to realize the same as it pertains to the human-human relationship. In this day and age, there can be no goal worth more than this.