Chapter 8
JEALOUSY AND SEX
Jealousy is one of the more difficult emotions to explain or understand. As it applies to teenagers and the way they handle it through expressions of sexual actions, it is even more difficult. But there is a close relationship between the jealousy teenagers experience and the pattern it often establishes for their sex practices.
Jealousy is an emotion that has raised havoc with many lives. It has been recognized since earliest times. It has caused crime and murders, heartbreak, and broken homes. Broken heads, too, especially from irate wives whose husbands have "cheated." Even so-called "normal" jealousy causes a great deal of unhappiness in the world. But with teenagers, jealousy takes a different turn, becomes symbolic of manhood and womanhood and frequently results in furious expressions through sex. Let us look at some of the case histories that jealousy and sex have provided the courts, the psychiatrist and sociologist, and the clergyman and police officer.
CASE HISTORY
Tina, who was raised by maiden aunts, lived a sheltered, usually-unhappy life until she turned fifteen. Then she became absorbed in school activities, for which she seemed to have a special flair. Her shyness continued, however, and she was barely able to talk to members of the opposite sex, including male teachers. But she was popular. She was pretty, too, and caught the attentions of the boys even if she did not seem to give the same attention back.
Tina's mind was something else. Here, fantasies of boys were spun almost constantly. Here, she dreamed the dreams of a normal, even if somewhat shy, teenaged girl.
Tina was made to face up to her shyness when she met a boy named Luke. He was attractive and one of the most popular boys in school. And he seemed to ignore her shyness and make her talk, even though it was apparent that she was too flustered to carry on a conversation.
"You shouldn't be so shy," he told her honestly one day when they were backstage of the auditorium preparing for a school assembly.
"I I can't help it," she explained in a meek voice.
"Sure you can," he said. "Just practice not being shy. Practice on me."
She raised her eyelashes and looked at him. She could not keep from smiling. Then, embar-rassedly, she glanced away again.
"See you almost did it," the boy said encouragingly.
"Almost did what?" she asked.
"Almost stopped acting shy with me."
"Oh."
"Do it again," he urged. "What?" she asked.
"Look at me and smile at me," he said simply.
Again she raised the long eyelashes. Again she smiled, this time holding it a little longer before she looked away.
"Hey, that was great," exclaimed the boy. "And now, how about the next step."
"What's that one about?" she inquired.
"All it takes is for you to say 'yes'. "
"To what?"
"To me asking you for a date."
"Oh."
"Hey, don't look away. It's not as bad as all that. Just look at me and I'll ask you."
Tina's eyes returned to those of the boy. Her mouth puckered in the beginning of a smile.
"How about going to the show with me Friday night?" the boy suddenly asked.
The girl started to drop her eyelashes.
"Uh, uh," scolded the boy. "Face up to it and to me."
"Well, gee, I don't--don't." Her sentence died an embarrassed death.
"I won't take no for an answer," Luke insisted. "I don't know if I can," Tina finally blurted. "Will you if you can?" Luke asked. "Well, sure, but..."
"Great," he exulted. "That's all I have to know. Now all you have to do is make it okay with your folks."
"I live with two aunts," Tina said, much as if that should explain all sorts of difficulties.
"Well, make it okay with your aunts then," the boy said, grinning. "And I'll call you tomorrow night I will, that is, as soon as you give me your number and then I'll pick you up at seven on Friday. How's that?"
"Fine," Tina said. "Just--just fine."
She gave Luke her phone number. And then she found an excuse to leave him as quickly as possible.
To Tina's surprise, her aunts agreed to the date with Luke. And then to her own surprise she conversed rather lengthily with him when he called on the telephone. And at last he was at her door, shining and bright and ready to escort her to the show.
Midway through the first picture of a double-film show, Luke took Tina's hand in his and held it. She started to withdraw it, but finally did not. Later, he played with her fingers, rather conveying, she later explained, some mysterious kind of love-making, as if his fingers told her the things that he wanted to do with "other parts of his body."
The date passed platonically. They established a pattern of regular companionship, however, and Friday nights became date nights for Tina and Luke.
After a few weeks, hand-holding was not enough for the popular and virile young man. One night he parked the car on a darkened street and attempted to kiss Tina. She refused him, was actually frightened of his advances. He did not press further; however, he was very silent on the way to Tina's home. She was sure that he was mad at her.
The next Monday, Tina noticed Luke walking a pretty girl to class. She steamed with the fury of jealousy: She knew that he did this now because she had refused him kisses the previous Friday night. She ached with remorse, remonstrated with herself that she had not given the very thing that she herself desired. Kisses. Signs of affection. Expressions of love. Tina has stated that her mind blazed with hundreds of thoughts, all evil, horrid, and directed toward herself for having refused Luke the simple wish of kisses. Tina was sure that Luke was through with her, that he would never again present himself at her doorstep. But he did the very following Friday night. She was overjoyed. She fled happily into the night with Luke's hand securely in hers.
Later, when Luke again parked the car on a secluded street and reached out for Tina, she went to him willingly, even attempted with kisses to make up for the lack of them the week before.
Several dates later, the young couple had progressed their desires to the touching of each other's body. And a week later, Luke attempted to have intercourse with Tina. She refused him tersely. They drove home in silence. And during the next several school days, Tina found Luke in constant attention of the same pretty girl she had seen him with before.
Jealousy swept Tina like a forest fire. She couldn't think of anything but her loss of Luke. Several times, he hardly talked to her in the halls during change of classes. She knew that it was the end, knew, too, that if it was, it would also be the end of herself. But, true to the pattern that had been set, Luke showed up for his regular Friday night date. Tina nearly fainted with happiness. But she was not so pleased that she could make a gift of her virginity when it was later asked of her by the boy. Again, silence prevailed during the ride home. Again, Tina discovered Luke with the other girl. Again, she remonstrated with herself. And again, Luke showed up for his usual date. And again, Tina was overjoyed to see him, to be with him, and to have the opportunity at last to present herself, all that he might want of her, for his pleasure.
The young people came together in a violent act of sexual intercourse that night. To Tina's surprise, she was desirable and sexual, and received for herself thrills that she had not expected possible. And she was so proud of Luke he had taken contraceptive precautions had a packet ready in the glove compartment just in case...
Soon, shows were bypassed by Tina and Luke on Friday nights, unless, that is, they were of the drive-in variety that provided the uttermost privacy for love-making in either the front or back seat of the car.
But an evening dawned in spring that was that night to bring heartbreak to Tina. More sober than she had ever seen him, Luke arrived for their date. Very quickly, he explained that he didn't have much time, that he had merely called in order to talk to her. Then he told her. They had to break up; he had a new girl and had promised complete fidelity of his mind and person. Then he drove the stricken and silent Tina home.
The week-end was a torture for Tina. She created scores of fantasies that showed her coming upon Luke and another girl upon whom she, Tina, raked her anger. She knew that Luke would not be calling for her the next Friday night not ever. She couldn't eat. Nor sleep. Nor do anything except wonder what had gone wrong and who the girl was that Luke had chosen over herself.
Monday Tina saw Luke with the girl he had squired between classes at other times. Tuesday was a repetition of Monday, and the rest of the week's days followed the same pattern Luke steadily with another girl.
Swamped by an abnormal jealousy, Tina could do nothing but entertain the most devious thoughts for revenge and hate all directed toward the girl, not Luke.
Tina waited until a Friday night to give vent to the fury of her jealousy. She armed herself with one of her aunts' long, sharp hatpins. She waited in the shrubbery by the school where she knew that the girl stayed late in rehearsal for the school's senior play. And then, when the girl appeared, Tina sprang and like a maniac rammed the hatpin again and again into the girl's face, her chest and breasts, belly, thighs, hips every place that Tina was sure Luke had known in betrayal to her own person.
Tina was arrested, placed under probation and the constant attention of a case worker, from whom this case history was acquired for presentation in this report. It was the black villain Jealousy who had moved shy Tina to an assault that fortunately did not result in death.