Chapter 7
Karen stepped from the tiny dressing room into the large, skylighted studio. The barn-like room was a littered disarray of lights, cameras, backdrops, props and other assorted tools of Carl Jenson's trade. She looked across the room to where Carl and Joe sat in earnest conversation, waiting for her. They seemed not to have noticed her re-emergence from the dressing room yet.
Well, she certainly noticed herself! She was flamingly conscious of her complete nudity beneath the kimono she had donned just now. A heart-fluttering mixture of fear and excitement seemed to fill her and turn her knees to rubber. This would be the first time in her whole life any man had ever seen her naked. Well, daddy had of course, but not since she was a much littler girl, certainly not since she'd begun to get breasts. Yes, she was both scared and thrilled by the knowledge that in a minute or two, the eyes of these two men would be examining her naked flesh. Not only that, they'd be making photographs of it for others to see later! Shocking. But wickedly exciting too.
The two men looked up and saw her. "Yes, come on over, Karen", Carl called cheerily, rising casually.
How could they be so nonchalant about what was happening?, she wondered. She liked Carl though. He was a big, gawky young man-around 25, she'd put him-rather lardy in the pants seat, with an open, innocent air about him that she felt she could trust. Of course, she had confidence in Joe ... Mr. Barnes ... too. She approached Joe and Carl.
"Well, let's get right down to business, shall we?", Carl suggested. He led her to a brightly spotlighted area in front of a white limbo backdrop. "Now, I'll want you positioned right about here", he directed her. "See the little X on the floor?"
Karen nodded, gulping. Oh lord, it was almost time. He'd be telling her to take off the kimono any second now. The lights were so bright. They'd be able to see everything. She had an impulse to turn and run as fast as she could. However, the panicked impulse faded as her frightened eyes flitted searchingly about and found Joe's. He stood off to one side, behind the lights. Somehow her courage returned as she looked into his eyes. Yes, she could have confidence in him. There was a comforting smile on his face which seemed to tell her he understood and sympathized with her perplexed emotions.
He said: "Don't worry, Karen. Everything will be all right. Carl and I know this is a little tough for a new model. Just try to relax, and remember we're all professional people, here to do a job. That's all."
His deep voice soothed her. Golly, he was a handsome man. A good, gentle man too, you could tell just by looking at him.
She saw Carl looking at her with questioning expectancy.
"Now?", she asked. Her pulse was racing and she hardly recognized the squeak of a voice that came out of her.
Carl nodded and said: "If you're ready." He held out his hand for the kimono.
She stood ramrod straight, closed her eyes, and gritted her teeth. There was a pause. Then, with trembling fingers, she parted the kimono and slipped it off. Every pore of her flesh was alive to the light friction of the fabric as it slithered off and away. Behind her closed eyes, she felt the blood rush burningly to her cheeks. Now she was stark naked, fully exposed to them, she knew. She didn't want to ever open her eyes. How could she possibly face them, how could she bear to see them looking at her? Her thighs were clamped tightly together as she stood rigid under the lights. It required a supreme effort of self control to keep her twitching hands from leaping to cover her naked femininity. Finally, she forced herself to open her eyes and extend the limp, empty kimono to Carl.
"Thanks, Karen", Carl mumbled distractedly as he took the kimono and turned away. He tossed the garment onto a chair and bent over his camera, fiddling with it. He hadn't even glanced down at her, she realized with a little shock of puzzlement. What the heck. You'd think he was getting ready to photograph a bowl of fruit, he was taking it so casually. She didn't know whether to be relieved or insulted at the photographer's apparent lack of male interest in her nude charms.
In any event, she could feel the nervous tension easing now that the deliciously dreaded first moment of exposing herself was passed. She was even becoming aware of the warmth radiating from the kleig lamps above and around her. It gave her a sensation something like taking a warm bath.
She dared at last to look in Joe's direction. He wasn't even noticing her! Was there something wrong with her, or what? Joe sat there leafing through a magazine.
He got up and stepped to where Carl was readying the camera. "I like this pose, Carl. What do you think?" He indicated a fetching nude in the men's magazine he'd been poring through. Carl nodded in agreement.
"OK, the camera's set", Carl announced, business-like. "Now Karen, honey, I want you to kneel. Right there on the X mark ... That's right, now sit back on your haunches ... Back straight ... Fine, good, now turn your shoulders just a little more toward me...."
As she arranged herself according to Carl's directions, Karen allowed herself a downward glance at her young nudity. She sought and found reassurance there. Of course there was nothing wrong with her. It wasn't at all that her figure wasn't lusciously feminine and sexy. The seeming disinterest of the photographer and the publisher was simply because, as Joe had said, they were professional people at work. She subtly thrust her saucy, round breasts a little farther forward, though Carl had not directed her to. There were very good breasts, she decided, stealing another quick glance at them.
"... Now if you could smile just a little bigger, Karen ... That's right ... Now tilt your head more to the side....", Carl was saying.
Maybe she was an inexperienced girl, but at leasts breasts were a subject she did know something about. She'd had countless opportunities to compare her own with other girls' in the locker room before and after gym class. Hers, if not huge, were certainly bigger than the average. She'd become aware of that long ago. Who wanted really immense ones anyway? That Mary Ryan, for instance, hers were like a cow's udders, hanging down so far and looking like they were always in her way ... The hue of her own nipples too, Karen thought, was prettier than most. Some of the girls had dark, leather-looking tips-Milly Tibbs even had hair growing around the edges of hers-where her own nipples were a glossy, soft pink shade, very delicate, very feminine. They sat high and proud on her perky round globes-A couple of the girls had even enviously told her she had the nicest pair of breasts at school. Veronica Schmidt had even asked her to let her touch them. She'd been on the verge of saying OK, but something about the way Veronica had looked at them, kind of a hungry look, had told her she'd better not.
"OK, Karen, hold it ... Look straight at the camera." She heard a faint click. "Got it", Carl said. "You can relax for a couple of minutes now."
Karen purposely made a little stumble as she rose, so that her creamy young spheres would jiggle and bounce. She veiled her eyes with her lashes and peeked at them as they wobbled independently for a second. Their smooth round contours seemed to shimmer under the bright photography lights. Yes, no one could say she didn't have fine breasts.
She looked toward Joe and was again disappointed to discover that he was not watching her. He was going through more magazines. Well, professionals at work or not, she hoped he wasn't all that unimpressed with her, from a male point of view. It suddenly dawned on her that her shy timidity about posing nude had evaporated completely. She was actually enjoying it now.
The two men agreed on a second pose and Carl gave step-by-step directions as before.
As she nestled into the alluring prone position, she realized with a tingly shock, that while the camera angle would hide some of her from the eyes of Guzzler's readers, the pose openly focused all her femininity in the direction where Joe was now standing. This time he was watching! She wondered wickedly if he could tell she was a virgin by looking at her from that angle.
"Karen, honey, move your knee a little more to the right", Carl directed.
As she complied, she knew the shifted position would show the camera less, but Joe was seeing even more. The knowledge sent a warm liquid surge through her. How tired she was of being a virgin. How wonderful it would be to stop being a virgin in the arms of a man like Joe Barnes. Heck, most of the other girls at school had long since taken the big step. She sometimes felt like a silly little child because she hadn't. Maybe she'd put too much stock in mother's stories about sex. Among other things, mother had insisted it could physically damage your body if you were too young. Well and good, but Sally Smythe didn't seem to be damaged from her affair with Walter. As a matter-of-fact, Sally looked healthier than ever. Karen would swear her breasts were larger now, and certainly Sally's complexion had cleared up. Of course, on mom's side was the fact that Carole Bascombe hadn't shown up for the graduation ceremony last week. The word was out that she was pregnant ... "OK, now smile ... real big ... that's right...." Carl's voice broke into her thoughts. Certainly, if she could somehow be lucky enough to have a man like Joe introduce her to the mysteries of sex, she knew she'd be all right. Joe would never let her get pregnant or hurt her soft body. He'd be strong and gentle. Her friend Wanda said all girls should have an older man for their first time. Oh, she bet, Joe would make it pure heaven for her. A fantasy scene entered her mind, wherein Joe hovered dynamically above her, his strong face close to hers, his masculinity overpowering her. So warmly moving was the image that she could feel herself throbbing with desire. She wondered if Joe could see her throbbing from where he sat.
Click...."OK, Karen, rest." Almost reluctantly, she tucked herself together, cutting off Joe's view of her charms. She hoped it had been exciting to him. His face, she saw, was a noncommittal mask. Surely he couldn't have been completely immune to interest in the moist loveliness she had spread before him.
The session continued. There were many more poses and clickings of the camera. She soon lost count of how many. Her thoughts became increasingly fixed on Joe Barnes and how wonderful it would be to have him make love to her. Her time had come, she decided resolutely, and she wanted him to be the one, her first. Maybe she'd have opportunities to see him often now that she was going to be working on Gaslight Square. She knew he must spend a lot of time there because of his business. Of course, she wasn't sure yet she could make an acceptable go-go girl, or even why Miss Smith wanted her to take the job at the Purple Pussycat. She'd said something about the dancing developing poise that would help later in her modeling work. Anyway, it'd let her be closer to Joe ... Surely, it wouldn't be an unpleasant experience for him, would it? Making love to her? She wouldn't expect him to get involved. He already had a very pretty sweetheart, she knew. But wasn't she worth a man's taking a little time off to give love lessons to? She would just bet she could make him glad he did.
At last, the photography session was at an end. As she dressed, she noted that her clothing, the garments she'd been so scared to remove a couple of hours ago, now felt unpleasantly binding.
Back in the studio, Joe praised: "You were a fine model, Karen. I'll send Miss Smith a check for a hundred dollars first thing in the morning ... Well, how'd you like your first modeling job? It wasn't so tough, was it?"
"Not at all, Joe", she replied, examining his face tenderly. "I want to thank you for the opportunity."
She departed filled with a yearning hope that soon-very soon-she'd have something even more wonderful to thank him for.