Chapter 7
Alice Turner figured that the only way out of her dilemma was to go to a computer matchmaker service. She figured a big computer would know who was right for her. Once she had found that perfect computerized mate, she was confident that she wouldn't have any trouble getting turned on with her horny young boys at high school.
A rather peculiar-looking woman was in charge of the computer mating service. She had obviously red hair which had gone into a maroon shade with improper dying.
"I want to help you any way I can," she told the teacher. "What do you like in a man?"
"Honest and integrity first," Alice smiled innocently.
The woman introduced herself.
"I'm Marvel de Gaston," she said, "and you are the first woman who has been so honest. Either they come in here and say they want a guy with a tremendous bank roll or they're cock-crazy women who want nine-inch cocks, two inches thick."
"Do they get that blunt about it?" Alice asked in amazement.
"Honey, the garbage that goes through this place you wouldn't believe. I've often thought of getting another job. But it is so fascinating in its way, I stick with it."
"Tell me," Alice asked eagerly, "does anyone ever find their perfect soul mate?"
"I can't say that exactly," Marvel de Gaston replied, "but I can tell you this. We've put together some very interesting combinations."
"I'll just bet you have," she told Marvel. "What did you draw out of the computer?"
"Unfortunately," she admitted, "I drew a black guy with a long licorice stick. He's real nice but he isn't too crazy about supporting me. Actually, he expects me and this big damned computer to support him."
"Is it worth it?" Alice asked her bluntly.
"Yes, I'd have to say it is," Marvel replied. "He's a great lover. A real tiger in bed. Does everything."
"Does he perform cunnilingus?" Alice said in a most sophisticated educated manner.
"If you're speaking of pussy eating, yes," Marvel said. "It's silly using big words like that. I used to when I first started here. But I got tired of it. For example, one of the computer questions was if you like to have cunnilingus. I put down as 'Do you want to have your pussy eaten?' You'd be surprised how many women like that."
"No, I wouldn't," Alice replied, "I'm crazy about getting my pussy eaten myself. It's so much fun."
"Yes, it is, isn't it?" she said quickly.
It was obvious to her what the score was. She was determined to do her best to be a brave person and tell the computer all.
"Do you like to give blow jobs?" Marvel de Gaston continued.
"Yes, I do," she replied.
"Do you like the short, the long or the medium-size cocks?" Mrs. de Gaston pursued the line of computer questioning.
"Long," Alice replied.
"Have you developed a taste for sperm?" she went on.
"Yes," Alice replied.
"Do you use pussy-eating jellies when you ask a man to go down on you?"
"I'm not familiar with them," the teacher answered.
Just then Marvel broke up the line of questioning.
"I'm glad I brought that up," she said. "We carry a nice line of pussy jellies right here. You would be amazed how the men perform when they're licking strawberry pussy jelly out of your box."
The line of questioning continued.
"Do you shave your box?"
"Now and then," she replied.
"Do you like to shave your box yourself or have someone else shave it?"
"I prefer shaving my own," she said, "I might pick up the Slasher sometime."
"I read you," Marvel continued as she scratched her head and went on to the next question.
"Do you enjoy being ass fucked?"
"Is that the technical term?" the teacher asked the counselor.
"No, dear," she shook her head, "sodomy is what we should say. But that sounds so dreadful, we thought ass fucking sounded better."
"Yes," Alice admitted, "I enjoy getting my ass screwed now and then."
"Providing you answered yes to this question," she went on, "do you prefer KY, Vaseline or oil?"
"Oil," she replied.
"If you don't mind my making a suggestion," Marvel said, "we have a marvelous oil for ass fucking. It's the computer special."
"It seems that you're in business to sell your line of goods," Alice snapped indignantly. "I came here to find the perfect love mate."
"Don't kid me," Marvel de Gaston laughed. "You wanted a fuck mate with a bank roll."
"All right," she said, "I guess that's the truth of it."
"Admit it, dear," Marvel chuckled, "we girls are all the same. It's a shame I wound up with a big prick who has balls but no cash."
"You can't have everything," Alice told her flatly.
"No," Marvel admitted, "but you can't blame a girl for trying, can you?"
"Do you like to go to orgies?" Marvel de-Gaston went on.
"That depends," she said, "if it is two men and me, yes. If it's two women competing for a man's affection, absolutely no."
"Do you have a fear of your pussy becoming loose?" Marvel asked her.
At that she burst out laughing.
"With all the use, it'll never get loose," Alice laughed hysterically.
"You sound like a slut," Mrs. de Gaston told her frankly, "and we don't do business with tramps."
"I guess I've got a twisted sense of humor," she apologized.
"I guess so," Marvel acknowledged.
"Do you have a preference for white or black men?"
"I like them both," she replied.
"Do you consider yourself a good fuck?"
"That's a silly question," Alice replied acidly. "Naturally I consider myself a very good screw. If I didn't I wouldn't be putting myself in the fucking marketplace."
"I'll thank you not to call our computer operation a fucking marketplace."
"That's exactly what it is, Marvel," Alice insisted, "and you know it is. The girls come here and the men come here to make it appear that all they want is a friendly association. They want to get laid."
"That's true," Marvel said. "Next question. How many times have you been unfaithful to a lover that you were supposed to be loyal to?"
"I've never had to be loyal to anyone but myself," Alice answered.
"Have you ever given an armpit fuck?"
"A who?" Alice asked.
"It appears you're not a very sophisticated lover," Marvel went on. "Every woman who has been around knows how vital armpit fucking can be."
"I guess I haven't been around that much," she told her. "When I get some more mileage on my body sexually speaking then I will be able to tell you."
"Bitch!" Marvel snapped as she continued the questioning. "How would you have sex with an obese man?"
"In a chair, of course," she told her. "I have seen a few movies."
"Apparently the right ones," Marvel chuckled as she went on questioning her. "Have you ever had sex with a dog?"
"No," she replied.
"If you've answered no to the above question," Marvel went on, "would you kindly state why?"
"Because I've never fallen for any dog," she said.
"Too bad," Marvel told her honestly. "Fucking with Fido can be fantastic."
"I'll leave the dogs for you, Marvel," Alice smiled smugly. "What's the next question?"
"In ten words more or less could you say why you would be a good playmate?"
"That's easy," Alice smiled. "Number One, I have big breasts. Number Two, I have a tight pussy."
"That's a very good answer," Marvel assured her. "That's where it's at."
"I can cook, too," Alice smiled proudly.
"The men who come here applying for friendship are not interested in cooking," she laughed.
Marvel was figuring up the score to place it all in the computer.
Shoving it into the computer Alice observed various lights and dials flash on.
"It will be just a minute, dear," she told her, "and I will have it all ready for you."
Some ugly sounds came from the computer and Alice couldn't help wonder if it was something she had said.
"Is that my fault?" she asked.
"Not in the least," Marvel assured her. "It's overuse and too little oil."
"I'm glad to know that," she assured her.
Marvel thought it might be a good idea to offset the noisy computer with some rock music. She put on a record by Led Zeppelin.
"It's making me nervous to listen to that, Alice said, "would you just mind letting me suffer with only the sounds of the computer whirring?"
"Certainly not, my dear," she told her.
When the computer had finished spinning Marvel de Gaston pulled out the mate that had had been selected for the teacher.
"Here we have him, dear," she told her, "we have a gigolo for you. A man who charges. He has a big cock, likes to have a box shaved but doesn't insist on shaving it. Likes ass fucking, likes to eat pussy, believes in having his cock sucked."
"What's his name?" she asked.
"Jean Pierre Duval," she replied.
"He sounds like a Frenchman," she said.
"Didn't take much education to figure that out, did it?" Marvel said as she went through her files. "Jean Pierre requires a fee for his services."
"A fee?" she snapped indignantly, "I've never paid to get fucked yet."
"There's always a first time," Marvel smiled.
"How much?" Alice Turner asked Mrs. de Gaston.
"Fifty dollars by the hour," she told her, "and he will give you a bargain package deal of a hundred dollars for a night."
"Are you sure you don't get a cut out of his services?" Alice asked, beginning to see a strange pattern forming.
"Of course not," Mrs. de Gaston replied, "that would be kick-back. I don't believe in payola in this business."
"All right," Alice said, "I guess there's a first time for everything. Do you want to call him up or should I?"
"Jean Pierre has quite a tight schedule, my dear," she said. "It might be a good idea for me to make an appointment for you to meet him."
"All right, if you want to," she agreed.
Mrs. de Gaston left her alone for a moment and went into another room. She returned from her inner sanctuary to inform her that Jean Pierre would be available that night.
"Where do I go?" she asked.
"He prefers going to your place," she smiled, "and he likes our various devices and items I've recommended. I would suggest that you take a pussy jelly kit, along with the house lubricant for ass fucking."
"How thoughtful," she told her.
It burned up Alice to see how materialistic minded the whole computerized sex operation was. She hoped Jean Pierre would not prove to be a disappointment. From all of the wonderful things that Mrs. de Gaston had said about him, he should be fantastic.
"And now," Mrs. de Gaston told her, "counting your pussy jelly kit, the ass fucking oil and my time and the computer's time, the total fee is one hundred and fifty dollars."
"You charge enough, don't you?"
"It costs a lot to keep the computer running," she replied evasively.
"Apparently," she said as she wrote out a check for her.
"I don't like to take checks," Mrs. de Gaston said, "don't you have a hundred and fifty dollars cash on you?"
"I wouldn't walk across the street with that much cash on me," she said, "not these days."
"That's true," Marvel admitted as she took her identification.
"Good luck with Jean Pierre," she told her, "I'm sure that the two of you will be perfect soul mates."
"I'm not interested in his soul," Alice replied, "what interests me is that big pecker swinging between his legs."
"I figured as much," Mrs. de Gaston smirked as Alice turned and walked out abruptly.