Chapter 3
Kitty had thought the confirmation of her virginity would be a triumph. It wasn't. She didn't feel one bit elated. Her mother's strange attitude added to Kitty's confusion.
Most mothers would have been relieved to know their sixteen-year-old daughter was a virgin, not her mother. Kitty could not understand it. Maybe her mother would have been happier if it had turned out that she was pregnant.
Kitty lay on her bed staring at the ceiling. Her mind whirled in a quandary about herself. The most disturbing thing was the way she had enjoyed having Peter's finger in her pussy. Even now, just thinking about it sent a warm quiver through her body.
She knew it was supposed to feel good to be touched there, but she could not help feeling a slight twinge of conscience. It was wrong to let a man do that to her. Even though her mother had never told her so, it was a part of Kitty's belief that a girl should remain pure. No, that wasn't really it either. She wasn't prudish enough to believe in the old fairy tale of the virgin bride. It was something else deep inside of her, a fear, which caused her to tremble at the prospect of a male touching her.
Once she had let Jimmy Compton touch her breasts. She had enjoyed letting him caress and fondle her. However, a cringing fear had welled up in her until she couldn't stand it any more and she had slapped him. Afterwards she had felt guilty and deeply ashamed. She had not let a boy touch her since.
Today, laying naked on that examining table, she had seen the gleam of desire in Peter's eyes. His lewd stares had embarrassed her. At the same time a strange feeling tugged at her. A tiny flicker of warmness had settled between her legs.
When Peter had touched her pussy a sharp pang of desire had flashed through her. When he inserted his finger in her vagina, Kitty had pretended it was a small penis. To her very great surprise it had felt good. Peter had also massaged her clitoris. Delicious sensations had spread quickly through her body.
Now, those same feelings returned. A tingling tightness grew in her belly. A warm quiver danced between her legs. She sucked in her lower lip. A deep, warm glow came over her. Unconsciously she pressed her thighs together. She gasped as a hot dart surged in her loins. Her eyes opened wide in startled surprise.
The hot dart became a rumbling arousal. Her body twitched. Her hips rolled in awakened desire. Kitty closed her eyes again. It felt so good.
She floated. She drifted in an erotic fantasy of brilliant, flashing colors and tingling, electric sensations. A warm wetness developed between her legs. The taut nipples of her breasts rubbed against her stiff bra.
Kitty moaned softly. Aroused desire was taking control. She tried to fight it. She told herself this was wrong. Good girls didn't do this.
A ripple of excitement churned in her belly. Her breasts were aching. Unconscious of her movement, Kitty's right hand moved slowly over her flat, quivering stomach. She pressed her belly lightly. A sharp spasm tore into her. She gave a tiny, barely audible gasp. Her hips jerked. She spread her hand and pressed again.
Kitty suddenly caught herself. Red faced, she sat up on the bed. Her head reeled. She had almost given into a perverse, lewd desire. It was horrible. What kind of person was she?
Despite her feeling of guilt, Kitty still experienced a certain warmness. She was concious of her physical needs for the first time. She glanced down at her naked thighs. Her short skirt had ridden high. She saw the white crotch of her panties and blushed a bright scarlet. Was it right to feel like this? Did other girls ever enjoy these forbidden pleasures? Was she unconsciously a shameless pervert? Kitty shook her head. She didn't know the answers any more.
Peter had awaken desires she thought she would never feel. He had degraded and embarrassed her, but he had made her feel good. He had enjoyed it too. Kitty had seen the way he eyed her. She remembered the way his pants bulged in front when he spread her legs. She knew it excited men to look at girls. She had never thought it would excite her to be looked at, or to see a man react that way to her.
Kitty lay down. A warm flood of aroused, youthful sensuality came over her. When her hand again moved toward her stomach she did not try to stop. She suddenly wanted to feel good again.
She pressed her belly. As a totally unconscious reaction her thighs opened. Kitty closed her eyes. She gave herself, fully, to the warm, tingling excitement filling her body. Her breasts rose and fell rapidly. Quivering desire vibrated in her loins. Her thighs opened wider.
Her hand moved lower on her stomach. Her tiny mini skirt was gathered high on her creamy thighs. Her hand trembled as it moved slowly, deliberately over the soaked crotch of her panties.
A sudden surge of liquid heat poured over her. A sharp gasp rolled from her open mouth. She moved her hand slowly over her damp crotch. An engulfing fire of lust roared around her.
A tiny voice of protest screamed in the back of her mind. Kitty ignored the faint voice. She pressed her hand tight over the moist, pulsing lips of her pussy.
Through the thin, soaked material of her panties, she felt the fire of her sex. Her throbbing labia burned. She rubbed her pussy slowly. Hot flashes of molten desire shot through her. Her hips jerked. Her body twisted. She moaned.
In complete, sensual abandon she rubbed her hand over her tender, virgin cleft, arousing herself to joyous heights of delight.
Eager for full satisfaction, Kitty jerked aside the crotch band of her panties. She touched the fiery heat of her moist cuntlips. A sudden, startled gasp shot from her. In haste her finger groped for the tiny button of her clitoris. A low groan rolled across the bedroom. She was surprised at how her clitoris was like a very tiny penis. She passed her fingertip experimentally over the fleshy knob. A hot flush of racing desire filled her. Her body churned. She moaned.
She rubbed her clitoris harder. The fiery sensations in her body became more intense. Her body jerked and trembled as if a powerful electric current was shooting into her. Her head rolled back. Her thighs went wide.
Her fingers danced in her juicy slit, arousing her with feverish excitement. Her hips rose high. Her body was seized in the throes of ecstasy. In total amazement her eyes opened wide.
A volcano suddenly erupted inside of her. Hot streams of molten lava poured through every vein and artery in her body. Kitty bit her lower lip. Her body arched. A hot, liquid flood bathed her crotch and fingers. Her virgin cleft dripped with the flow of her sweet honey.
Kitty collapsed. Her body was completely drained. She removed her hand from between her legs and closed her thighs.
As the erotic frenzy faded, Kitty was crushed beneath a wave of shame and guilt. She had masturbated. Tears welled in her eyes. She roiled over and buried her face in a soft pillow. Her tears flowed freely.
The full shame of what she had done numbed her with shock. How could she have done that? What inconceivable power had forced her to do it? She began to sob. Her wracking sobs echoed her flowing guilt. She covered her ears with her hands to drown out the pathetic cries of misery. She felt an overwhelming shame and disgust at herself. She had behaved like a love starved whore, just like her mother.
Kitty suddenly remembered the time she had caught her mother masturbating. She had not meant to intrude. She had only wanted to talk to her mother. She had gone to her mother's room and knocked lightly on the door. After a minute or so, she eased the door slightly ajar.
Stunned, she saw her mother laying on the bed, naked. Between her widespread legs two fingers pumped wildly in and out of her dripping pussy. Kitty stood at the door, unable to move. She watched helplessly as her mother drove her own fingers into her body. It was a sickening scene.
A deep, unconcealed disgust welled up inside of Kitty. At that time, in spite of the disgust, she had felt her own body responding to the erotic performance. In fear of being caught in a web of erotic sin like her mother, Kitty closed the door.
After that, Kitty seldom spoke to her mother. She became determined to pull herself above what her mother was. She vowed never to let a man touch her until she was married. She had to prove, to herself, that she was better than her mother.
Now, with crushing humiliation and dark despair, Kitty realized she wasn't any better than her mother, after all. She had given into the devil which inhabited her body too, the same devil that controlled her mother.
When there were no more tears to shed, Kitty rolled over onto her back. Her normally, bright, sparkling eyes were red and puffy. She brushed her hand across her damp cheeks, sniffled and sat up slowly.
In a daze she unbuttoned her blouse. She pushed it from her shoulders. Her bra followed. She stood up and shed her skirt and damp panties. Naked, she crossed the room to a full length mirror. She stared at her ripe, nude image.
Her body, that she had been so proud of, now filled her with shame. She quietly surveyed her full, pink nippled breasts and the brown tuff of hair at her pubis.
Kitty could not stand to look at herself. She turned away from the mirror and went to the bathroom. She turned on the shower and stepped under the almost scalding water. As the stinging stream struck her body, Kitty felt a sense of refreshness. The hot spray was washing away the perverted desires of her body, cleansing her of the sin of masturbation.