Chapter 13
Harry had never been in a ladies' room before.
He was rather surprised to note that it differed from a men's room to a very minor degree. There was nothing but sinks and stalls.
Stalls, he thought. That's what I'm doing. Stalling.
He wished suddenly that he was back on the road, and away from all this. He wished he had never gone to the Red Apple Inn, or the Happy Inn Motel. He wished he had never met Judy, or the bartender, or the little old lady, or the blonde.
You never know how big a mistake can be until you've made it, he thought, and then it's too late.
He wondered what Judy was doing at this moment. Was she still asleep? Or had she awakened and found him gone? He closed his eyes for a moment and frowned.
She couldn't know what happened, he thought. She's only a little kid. She couldn't have any idea that it was anything less than perfect.
He remembered the feel of her body. Yes, it had been good for her. He was certain of it. Only the most experienced woman could simulate passion like that, and only when she wanted something more than love from the man with her. Judy was a child and a virgin-or rather, had been a virgin-and no girl that young could react in such a classic, totally female way unless she was actually feeling the deep stirring of passion and excitement.
It had been good for her.
How could she know that it had been so bad for him?
I'm not that old, he thought. I'm not a dried-up old man yet. I'm still in my prime-there are plenty of years of life ahead of me.
But if that's so, then what happened?
He remembered the deep satisfaction he had felt when Judy gave herself to him, when he had felt her slim body against his. It had been wonderful to feel a woman in his arms after so long a time without one; to feel her soft breasts against his chest, her arms across his back. He had felt the passion lift them together and she had matched his rhythm with one of her own. The motion, the moment had been as old as time-
He had felt her lithe body against him-he had seen her lips part and the pale gleam of her teeth as a hoarse breath escaped her mouth.
Then, she had subsided, her body slowly going limp, her hands slipping from his back, slowly settling on the bed.
It was over. For her.
There had been nothing he could do. She had subsided into sleep almost immediately, saying his name softly. Her face had cleared of passion and soon he saw a child-like innocence steal across it. Her breathing became deep and regular. He was alone.
There was no use trying to regain the moment that had been so close. She was asleep-she didn't know. Waking her and beginning again would be a cruelty that Harry could not even consider.
So, he had quietly moved and left her with her dreams. He bad climbed from the bed and gone to the bar.
She is young, he thought, and the urge had been strong within her. Perhaps it wasn't my fault. If I had been closer in time to her, maybe it would have happened to both of us together.
He smiled quietly to himself. I gave her what she wanted, he thought. She is a woman now, a woman with her whole life before her.
What do I have to look forward to?
He opened his eyes and found the bartender beside him. The big man was staring at the two women near the sink.
Harry looked at the blonde, still unable to believe it. There was no doubt whatever in his mind-this was the same beautiful woman he had seen in the parking lot of the Red Apple Inn. He wondered what sequence of events had brought her here, and what twist of fate had done such havoc to her.
The blonde was crying. The sobs were the most total and heart-felt that Harry had ever seen-they came from deep inside her and set her body trembling as they burst forth. It was painful to watch her cry like that. Harry felt a wrench of sympathy for her grief.
The bartender was speaking to him, but Harry missed the beginning of the sentence...." all right, she says. Nothing to worry about. She thinks the woman's just drunk, or something. She took her here to try to calm her down."
Harry tried to gather his thoughts. "What's wrong with her?" he asked.
The bartender shrugged. "I don't really know. Elsie says she's frightened of something. She can't get the story straight. Anyway, she says for us to wait outside for a while. Come on."
He took Harry's arm and led him out through the door. He cast one glance back over his shoulder and saw that the woman was resting her head on the old lady's arm. They were talking, but Harry couldn't catch what was being said.
Outside, the bartender pulled a pack of cigarettes from his shirt pocket and handed one to Harry He took it without a word, and they silently lit up. Harry blew a plume of smoke into the night air. A glow of red light from the bar across the court touched the cloud briefly. Then the wind took it.
"That woman is going to get in a lot of trouble some day," the bartender said.
Harry looked at him. "Which one?"
"Elsie. The lady who runs this place." He shook his head.
"What about the blonde?" Harry asked. "Do you know her?"
"Hell, no. I never saw her before in my life. She just came in today-this afternoon, in fact. She had a young boy with her."
Harry frowned. "A young boy?"
"Yeah-a kid about eighteen or so. They took a room together."
Harry puffed on his cigarette for a moment is silence. Then he said, "What do you think about them?"
The bartender spread his hands. "I had an idea that they were relations, or something. The ages looked about right for aunt and nephew or something like that. Elsie thought they were going off together to make love. I told her she had a dirty mind."
The bartender smiled. "Now, I'm not so sure."
"I wonder what happened to them? Something must have happened to make the blonde cry like that. Did the little louse hurt her?"
"I thought about that," the bartender said, "and I don't think so. I saw the kid, remember. He didn't look like a trouble maker to me. He was just a kid, that's all. Whatever happened to that woman, he wasn't responsible for it."
Harry said, "Where is he now?"
The bartender looked at him and raised his eyebrows. "That, pal is a very good question."
They fell silent for a time. Harry thought of the image of the blonde crying in the old lady's arms. What could have done that to her, he wondered.
The memory of his encounter with her in the parking lot came back to him. The way she posed and preened and displayed herself. He had formed an immediate opinion of her there-she seemed to him to be a woman going to meet a lover.
Now, he had to revise his thoughts completely. Having seen her torn apart by sobbing, the image of the self-contained, self-possessed woman was no longer valid. The old lady seemed to think she was frightened of something, and Harry couldn't help agreeing with her. The blonde was terrified.
Harry felt a momentary urge to go back into the ladies' room and comfort her, then shook it away. It was none of his business. None of this was any of his business.
"I got to get back," the bartender said. "I can't leave the bar untended." He turned to Harry. "Stay here, will you? Stay here until Elsie comes out. Make sure everything's all right."
"Sure," Harry said.
The bartender reached out and shook Harry's hand "My name's Red," he said. "Harry."
"I hope whatever's bugging you works out okay," Red said.
Harry smiled. "I'll be all right. I hope you and Elsie work everything out too."
Red stared at him for a moment, then returned his smile. "Yeah. Thanks."
Harry watched the bartender as he walked across the court to the bar. A door opened and closed.
Harry sat down on the steps and nursed his cigarette. It occurred to him that he had better return to Judy soon. She was probably awake now, and wondered what became of him.
He wondered whether he should make love to her again. No, he thought, that wouldn't be any good. Once, and he could talk himself into thinking it was a noble gesture. Twice, and he was a louse.
I'm a louse already, he thought. Nothing's going to change that.
As he thought about it, he knew what he would do. The girl would be better off if she never saw him again; if she slept the night alone and found him gone in the morning. It would be best if he paid for the room and left right now, removing himself from her life forever. Nothing good could come from his hanging around. He had done what he had promised her; waiting around would only spoil it.
The best thing would be for him to go to his car now and drive out of this territory for good. He should put as much mileage between himself and Judy as possible before morning.
He shook his head. No that was no good. He had promised the bartender that he would wait until the business in the ladies' room resolved itself, and he didn't want to break his word. He would have to remain here for a while at least, until the two women came out. Then he could leave.
He listened carefully for a moment, but there was no sound coming from inside the room. He wondered what was happening. Then he wondered if everything was all right. Perhaps the blonde had gotten sick. Perhaps the old lady needed help-
He stood up and flicked his cigarette off into the dark. He was just mounting the steps when the old lady appeared in the doorway.
They stood and looked at each other for a short time. Then the old lady said, "What kind of man are you?"
Harry wasn't sure he had heard correctly. "What did you say?"
"Who was that young girl you brought here with you? What did you to to her?"
Harry knew he should be offended at the question, but the woman's face was so calm and her tone so reasonable that he felt no offense at all. "She's all right," he said. "I didn't hurt her."
"Did you make love to her?"
"Yes," Harry said.
"Did she want you to make love to her?"
"She needed it," Harry said "She needed it from somebody that wouldn't hurt her."
The lady nodded. "What are you going to do about her? Are you running out?"
"Yes," he answered. "If I stay here, she may decide she loves me, and that would be a big mistake."
The lady watched his face closely. "Does she have a home to go back to?"
"Yes," he said "She'll be all right. She has a home and a job, and she'll find somebody to love her. She's a woman from now on."
The lady came down the steps. "That woman inside...."
Harry waited for her to finish the sentence. Finally, he asked, "What about her?"
"She needs a man," the lady said. "She needs a man more than anything else in the world. She needs him right now. I don't know what's going to happen to her if she doesn't get a man soon."
The old lady turned and walked away before he could reply. He watched her cross the court.
I'm a pacifier, Harry thought. I make women happy. I make them forget the cares of the day. First a young virgin, now a crying blonde.
He looked up. The blonde had appeared in the doorway Her face was washed of make-up. Her eyes were still bright with tears.
She's beautiful, Harry thought. Am I going to take her to bed to satisfy an old lady's whim?
He came slowly up the steps toward her. She looked at him with apprehension in her eyes.
"Who are you?" she said.
He took her hands in his own.