Chapter 2
A delicious sensation lingered deep down in my pussy, a kind of erotic itch that was brand new to me. It made me want to do everything at once—to be fucked, to be eaten out, to be at the head of a gang bang—but my brothers resumed their vigil with the same grim determination that had kept me a virgin for far too long. Mr. Harris seemed to share my condition, judging by the looks he gave me in class. That thick bulge in his pants grew whenever out eyes met and reminded me of the delights it had given me. And when it did that erotic itch badly needed scratching, but I knew the only tool that could reach it was out of my reach. The day after I was deflowered, I tried to give my brothers the slip just to be with him. I didn't care about the consequences. After I'd been fucked, my brothers could punish me any way they wanted to. However, as soon as I stepped out of the classroom they circled me like an honor guard and I was marched off to our house. I saw my teacher standing at the gate looking at me with longing.
Once home I went into my own room and tilted a chair against the door to make sure no one would interrupt me. It was hot outside and my clothes clung to me like sodden rags. I paced around my room for sometime, trying to thin]? of ways I could escape but it was all to no avail. My room was on the second floor, too long a drop for a person in my edgy condition. The folks were downstairs in the living room, so they had a clear view of the front door. I felt like a prisoner!
My frustration grew by the minute. Suddenly my clothes were a prison in themselves and I tugged at the buttons and zipper till all the garments were on the floor and I was naked save for my panties. They were soaked from the long day at school and released a heady, tantalizing odor that excited me as much as it might have excited any male. I knew that routine masturbation wouldn't have any effect on me. My body needed stronger medicine, something out of the ordinary, to distract me from my plight. It was hard to think, though. I kept pacing over toward the window and measuring the drop with my eyes, wondering over and over if I couldn't make it, if I would be noticed, if I could get away with it. Perhaps if I waited for nightfall ... but that was too long into the future. It was summer, the days were endless, and I needed my satisfaction right away.
There was a knock on the door. In accordance with the regulations of the Fuller household, I covered my nakedness before I opened up. My mother didn't like her children to be too open with each other. Burt, my youngest brother, came in and sat on the bed, frowning as though he had something on his mind. I gathered my robe around me and sat in the chair facing him.
"Listen, Wanda," he began hesitantly, looking everywhere but into my eyes, "you might be able to help me with a problem I'm having. I mean, you're a girl and girls know about girls, right?"
"I guess so," I said. My hands rested in my lap, tempting my pussy like a little blind animal might be tempted by the smell of food in a trap.
"Why, what's the matter?"
"Well ... it's this girl I've been seeing lately, Judy ... do you know her? What I mean is, do you know her well?"
"Pretty well." I knew he'd been taking her out on Saturday nights but he'd never talked to me about her. That was another thing I resented—that my brothers were allowed to date and I wasn't. Jerry, the oldest, who attended the college of which my high school was a part, could go out all weekend if he wanted to, and Mason, Will, and Burt could stay out till late on Saturday nights, but I couldn't go anywhere unattended.
"She and I have been going together for two months now," Burt went on, "and we've been getting into some hot situations now and then, you know? But for it to get any hotter I have to know what she thinks of me. Has she ever talked with you about that?"
"Hot?" I queried, raising a prim eyebrow. "How do you mean exactly, Burt?"
"Oh, you know ... third base and all that," he mumbled. His blush was very becoming. Burt wasn't as robust as the other three but he was the best looking. His hair was darker than mine, almost light brown, and his eyes were big and dark, his features were fine and distinct, much like mine were. In fact we were often mistaken for twins.
"I see ... and now you want to go all the way?"
"That's what's in the back of my mind," he mumbled.
"Tell me, exactly what have you and Judy been up to? Does she let you do everything? And when you touch her in certain places, does she seem to like it?"
"She seems to like it just fine." Now he warmed to his subject and I could tell by the retrospective look in his eyes that he was busily reliving some of his finer adventures. While he was preoccupied, I slipped one hand into the folds of my robe and began to secretively fondle my pussy, very carefully, very slowly, imagining the situation vividly as he talked. "We go to the drive-in a lot, you know, and now it's at the stage where we don't even bother to take in the speaker. She likes me to touch her breasts and kiss the nipples especially, and when she gets really excited—but you don't want all the details, do you?"
"I won't know what's going through her mind unless you tell me everything." I said firmly.
"Well, she doesn't like to be fingered but she loves to be stroked right between her legs. She can't get enough of that. When she gets hot from me sucking on her nipples she just takes my hand and puts it right between her legs, and then she starts to move her hips very sensually so that the side of my hand rubs into her box.
That goes on for hours, and all I have to do is sit there and leave it to her."
"Sounds like she enjoys your company," I said, "but what does she do for you?"
"That's just it," he said, sitting forward and fixing me with an intense look. "She doesn't do a goddamned thing! It's like her body is a pleasure machine and I'm the operator! Not that I'm complaining. I get a hell of a kick out of playing with her. But now and then I get so hard and horny that I don't know what to do with myself. The other night, for instance, my balls were three times their normal size and ached like mad. They hurt so much that I couldn't even—" He broke ofE and looked away, blushing again.
"Perhaps she's just shy," I suggested. Images floated through my mind like tropical fish in an aquarium I could just see little red-headed Judy writhing naked in the back of Burt's car, moaning and pushing her pubic bone against his hand. And it was also easy to imagine her wallowing in her selfish pleasure, unaware of my young brother's needs. I was sure she'd been laid at some time or another but she never talked about it, not even when all of us girls laid our cards on the table.
"Shy?" Burt laughed sarcastically. "You ought to see her at the drive in! The lights go down and before they're fully out, her clothes are off and she's pressing her tits into my face and using my hand as a kind of vibrator. No, she's anything but shy."
"About sex, I mean. Perhaps she's had a bad experience. And if that's the case you're going to have to decide on the best course of action and follow through with it."
"You're a great help," he snorted. "But then, you haven't had much experience in this field, have you?"
"No, not really. Speaking as a girl, though, that's what you'll have to do."
"Okay, thanks, Wanda." He walked out of my room no happier than he'd entered it, but he'd given me something that I'd been looking for. My mind had been stoked up and my fantasy had taken shape. All I had to do now was secure the door and He back on my bed to let it develop. I could see the whole scene when I shut my eyes, Httle Judy with her tiny tits, avid, feverish, holding her pink nipples up to my brother's mouth. And him seizing on them, his cock throbbing painfuUy in the dark recesses of his underpants, touching himself the way I touched my pussy in class or when he'd been talking to me, just to give it a Httle support. I opened my robe wide and pushed one hand down into my panties to cup my wet, needy pussy and squeeze it reassuringly. Help was on the way. Burt's cock, long and slender, stiU pinker than Mr. Harris', loomed before my mind's eye. I'd glimpsed at it now and then, and I'd had a long, good look at it the time I saw him jerking off in the bathroom some months earner when I'd come home early from a party held by my uncle. He looked so happy then, sitting on the toilet with his cock held softly in his clenched fist, stroking up and down and gazing at the flushed knob with affection.
Slowly two of my fingers worked their way into my pussy hole, rotating inside the tight clamp of the muscles to make room for themselves. One thought led to another, cocks dangled and towered before my eyes, my thumb began to titillate my clitoris, my free hand caressed my nipples teasingly, and my body began to undulate to the beat of my desires. I recalled every detail of my experience with Mr. Harris, all the sensations, until they were threadbare. Then back to Burt and his little redhead, using the situation until it wouldn't yield any more inspirations. It just wasn't enough!
Restlessly, I pulled my panties off and threw my robe in a corner, to begin pacing once more, fingering myself, looking at my reflection in the mirror, adopting all sorts of lewd poses, even pretending that there was a CIA man hidden behind the mirror watching my every move. Before, that had sufficed to bring me undone, but I'd had a taste of the real thing and playing with myself just couldn't get me there anymore. I ended up standing behind the long lace curtains, peering out of the window to find my inspiration in the world. Some boys passed, boisterous and loud, bursting with virility. What if I were to leap out of the window, stark naked, and fling myself at their feet? Bold thoughts crossed my mind without moving me to action. It was all in vain.
A plan began to well up in my mind as I stood at my window, exhibiting myself with revealing my body to the world. The lace curtains billowed slightly under pressure from the summery zephyr, and stroked against my oversensitive skin like a tender lover. My mind moved away from sex and into the realm of ideas: Didn't I have a cunt right here between my legs? If I could seduce all four of them, wouldn't they leave me alone? I could always blackmail them afterward by threatening to tell Mom and Dad that they'd raped me. But no, that was incest. I couldn't do that.
Yet the idea tantalized me and my masturbation grew more effective by the second. Young Burt could be swayed—and how nice it would be to make love with him. His body was so lean and tough, his cock so long, and I had a feeling that he would be a poet in bed. No, no, I couldn't think like that! I'd just keep on fantasizing for the sake of my orgasm, and then I'd stop. My mind drifted over to Will, bigger and rougher, but gentle in his own way. He was handsome and blond, and all the girls in my class adored him because he was captain of one of the football teams. Or Mason, a freshman, sporty, suave, a surfer, dancer, and a lover rolled into one. But why not take it to the extreme and opt for Jerry?
Now my juices really began to flow. Jerry was big, brutish, and dangerous. I'd seen him beat up three kids at once for my sake, and no one in the college crossed him. He wore his hair in a crewcut and had been an Eagle Scout. Broad-chested, muscular, and deeply tanned, he looked more like a bouncer than a sophomore, which is what drew me to him. I could imagine how he would make love to me—passionately, quickly—and with all the force of a pneumatic drill!
That did it. I tumbled down onto the carpet and squeezed my tits and pusssy in desperation as the bubble of my orgasm grew and grew—and popped! At once guilt overcame me. It was wrong to think of your own brothers in sexual terms. There had to be another way to secure my freedom and I would do everything to find it. I put my robe back on and hurried over to the bathroom to take a cold shower. Still in a haze and distracted by my guilt, I didn't notice that the door was shut, which was only the case when someone was inside. I just opened it and walked in, and there, sitting on the toilet, was Jerry.
I almost fainted. Were circumstances conspiring against me? He had his pants down around his ankles and rested his elbows on his knees, as if lost in thought. I couldn't see anything, just the dark shrubbery of his pubic hair, but that was enough. I screamed and jumped back to slam the door. Then I rushed back into my room and threw myself on the bed, as frustrated as I had been when I came home. My heart was pounding and my pussy ached with desire. He'd looked like such a hunk of man sitting there, those powerful thighs well apart, thighs that could crush me if he was ever to ride me.
While I was trying to collect myself the phone rang. The one concession my parents had made to my right to privacy was to give me a phone of my own, and that had been given with reluctance. I picked it up with a trembling hand and said: "Hello?"
"Hello, Wanda, it's me, Frank."
"Oh, Frank!" I cried, "Where are you?"
"I'm at home, baby, just thinking about you,"
he said huskily. "And I'm wishing you were here right now so I could make love to you. Why couldn't you come with me after school?"
"I wanted to so much, but my brothers...."
"Oh yes, your brothers. But if you'd really wanted to be with me, you would have found a way," he said.
"Believe me, it was impossible. Oh, Frank, if only you knew how much I need you!"
"I need you too, baby. I can't get those lovely tits of yours off my mind."
"Is that all?"
"And your beautiful little ass," he went on, breathing heavily. "And that delicate pussy of yours. I can just taste it now, the softness of your lips and the tightness of your hole, and how good it felt to have my cock buried deep inside of you. There has to be a way we can get together tonight. I'm dying to fuck you again."
"I know just how you feel—hey, listen, perhaps there is a way, but it's a risky one. If Jerry were to find out I don't know what he'd do to you."
"Don't worry about me, Wanda, just tell me what it is."
"Well, there's a ladder leaning against the back of our garage, and if you put that up under my window after midnight____"
"I'll be there," he said, "one o'clock on the dot. Wait for me baby." He hung the phone up and left me with far too much time on my hands. All that evening I was restless and nervous. The family noticed it and kept asking what was wrong, but I told them it was just women's troubles. I bathed at great length and perfumed my body as if I wanted to seduce a stranger. But I wanted to be perfect for Frank, I wanted it to be a night he'd want to repeat often.
At eleven o'clock I went to bed and switched on the TV to try to make time pass more quickly. The others were turning in one by one, and with every bedroom door that closed I breathed more easily. Burt came in for a little while to ask again if Judy had said anything to me, but I promised him I'd drill her the next day. Then Mom and Dad went to bed and the house fell silent. Midnight. The street lights threw a pale yellow succession of pools along the pavement and I kept my room dark so I'd see Frank the moment he came by. It was dead quiet outside too, which worried me. If he made one sound the jig could well be up. I was so anxious that the TV programs didn't even register.
Finally, the clock in the distance struck one, and I saw a shadowy figure slip into our yard. A minute later I heard the ladder scrape against the wall and soft footsteps coming up the rungs. I rushed over to the window, opening it wide, and welcomed him inside with open arms. "Frank!" I whispered, hugging him tightly. "Frank darling! I thought you'd never get here!"
He kissed me fiercely, his hands moving the straps of my nightie off my shoulders so that the flimsy garment slithered down my body and left me naked. It felt so good to have his big, strong hands caressing me, to have his hard cock pressing through his trousers against my belly, and I kissed him back as hard as I could. His tongue slid along my teeth and gums and his hands grabbed my cheeks so hard that I almost fainted with desire. I wanted him to fuck me right there and then, but Frank wanted to prolong the moment. We remained clenched in our embrace for some minutes while he explored every part of my body. Then, freeing myself from his embrace with an effort, I began to undo his shirt, baring his broad chest, running the tips of my fingers through the small clump of hair there for a moment before turning my attention to the buckle of his belt. He waited impatiently as I struggled with it but made no move to help.
At last his pants slid out of the way and left him naked except for his briefs. The outline of his cock was clearly visible in the faint light coming in from the street. I sank down on my knees and rested the side of my face against his dick, experiencing the throbbing virility of it. My hands moved along his strong hairy thighs, feeling the tense muscles, and for a moment Jerry's thighs flashed into my mind, just as powerful, masterful! Quickly I turned my face so that his cock pushed against my nose, and my uncertain fingers tugged at the elastic of his briefs to get them out of the way. Frank stood there with his legs apart and arms akimbo, gazing down at me and breathing heavily. I knew this was what he wanted, and I wanted to please him so he'd please me later. Once more his dick reared up before me and I tasted it gingerly, just getting the feel of it before I tried to swallow it all.
My pussy clamored for its share of his hard meat but for the time being I set aside all my needs to concentrate on the wonderful sensation of holding his manhood between my lips. My hands rested on his hard buttocks, stroking them absently. He smelled so good, so masculine, sweat and tobacco mingling with the odor of clothing, making me even more hungry for all of him. Half his cock was lodged in my mouth and I drew my head back and forth greedily, trying to get more of him into my body.
Somehow we managed to get onto the bed; Frank lay with his face close to my crotch while I kept on sucking at his big cock. His hands were on my tits and pussy, stroking and pinching, fingering and rubbing, working me up to a peak of passion that made it almost impossible for me to do his cock justice. I tried as hard as I could to keep sucking at it and to jerk him off with one hand but there were long moments when I just had to lie back and let him do it all.
"Let's put the light on," he whispered and I nodded my reply, my mouth being too full of him. He turned on one of the directional lamps at the side of my bed and adjusted it so the beam fell directly on my pussy. "Beautiful," he sighed, making himself comfortable with his face an inch or two away from the center of his attention. "I love that little snatch of yours, Wanda."
"How could it be different from other women's?" I asked, coming up for air briefly.
"Few of them have such distinct labia," he said, sounding like a teacher suddenly. "Your lips are surprisingly full and smooth, and they really push out. The hairline is lower, too, leaving the lips almost bald. Hey, have you ever considered shaving all the hair off?"
"Not really. Why, would you like me to?"
"Would I!" His cock found my open mouth and pushed its way inside with such force that I almost choked! Obviously the idea excited him tremendously. "I'll pay for the electrolysis, if you want."
"Ssshhh!" I cautioned him. He'd raised his voice during that fit of anticipation and I didn't want him broadcasting his presence in my room. He shut himself up by pressing his mouth against my pussy in a long, drawn-out kiss, moving his head from side to side the way people do when they kiss each other on the mouth. I clutched at his cock weakly with one hand as the rampaging pleasures tore through my body and fanned my lust to make my need for him unbearable. "Do it!" I urged him. "Please, Frank, make love to me."
He was on top of me right away, his strong, heavy body crushing me once more, his knob butting into my cunt looking for the hole, and then it slid into me, slowly, forcefully, easing its way back and forth until he was up me to the hilt. But when he began to fuck me in earnest the bedsprings began to squeak ominously.
"Stop, stop!" I hissed. "Well wake the whole house up this way."
"Let's get on the floor, then." He withdrew his cock and waited till I was prostrate on the rug, which was soft and fluffy. But something went wrong when he tried to penetrate me again. His cock buckled in the middle and I heard him curse under his breath. "What's the matter?"
"Goddamn thing's gone soft on me!"
"What?" I had no idea what he was talking about. As far as I was concerned cocks were like fingers—you either straightened them or bent them. Frank's scowl told me it wasn't quite so simple. "How can that be?" I asked. "Don't you want me?"
"I want nothing else," he grumbled. "You're going to have to make me hard again, baby, or we're both going to be two very frustrated people."
"Okay." I tried to hide my disappointment. My mood was perfect for a good, hard fuck, and now it would have to be postponed until I got him functioning again. I wondered if many men had that problem or if it was peculiar to Frank. Still, if I wanted him to rise again I would have to get down to it.
By the time I got to his dick it was as soft as his tongue, wet from my pussy, resting on his left thigh like a sleeping baby. I took it between my lips and tasted the tart juices of my own body with secret delight. I tasted good! Making a mental note to get a few more licks of myself after he'd gone, I swallowed him whole, this time without effort, and began to suck on it. This was nice, I thought, once I got the feel of what I was doing. His dick was endearing in its flaccid condition, sort of helpless and yet pacifying. I moved my body until my cunt was hard op against his shin bone and worked it up and down for my private pleasure while I did my best to straighten out his dick with lips, tongue, and teeth. He didn't respond at first but he caressed my hair in approval of my efforts.
Minutes ticked by, minutes during which my lust grew and his cock didn't. I began to despair. Perhaps it would never go up again, perhaps I was the last woman he'd ever fuck. Or was it that I no longer excited him? I would have to shave my box to get him aroused next time. But what if my family noticed I no longer had that golden bush down there? They'd be sure to suspect something. No, I would have to find other ways.
My hands slid up under his ass and my fingers pushed down into the narrow slit between his cheeks to see if that would do it. At once his cock gave a little start and I dug in deeper. It was working! I eased one finger over to his asshole and pressed down on the soft but unyielding sphincters. Another throb and his cock was half-hard! Encouraged I pressed as hard as I could and the reluctant muscles parted to admit the top joint. His asshole clamped itself around my finger very tightly, cutting off my circulation, but it was so nice that I worked the rest of my finger into him. Warm and slightly moist, his asshole relaxed slowly and I explored the cavity beyond the sphincters with amazing results. His cock grew hard as rock within a minute. I expected he would throw me down and fuck me at once, but instead he levered himself up on both feet and presented his ass to me in full.
I could take a hint. His cock slapped back against his belly as I took my mouth away from it, and then I began to nuzzle his cheeks with nose and tongue, exploring some more. He tasted musky, sweaty, down there, unpleasant at first. But as I persisted that unpleasant taste began to excite me. The tip of my furled tongue entered his now open asshole and flicked at the in-sides of his body. Frank groaned audibly and I heard him take hold of his dick to begin beating off. My tongue ran along the slit of his ass for as far as it could get, came back down to his puckered little asshole, went back further to twist up to take his balls into my mouth, savoring all of him. It seemed as though all of my lust had shifted to my mouth because I'd forgotten all about getting fucked.
In the middle of this oral feast there was a knock on my door. We froze. For a moment I didn't know what to do. Then, in a flurry of decisiveness, I gathered up his clothes and threw them under the bed. Frank lay dead still, hidden from view by the bed, and I hurried over to the door to open it a little way. In my haste, I'd forgotten to put on my robe, however, and when Burt saw me naked his mouth dropped open in shock.
"Burt!" I whispered. "What's the matter that you have to wake me up at this hour?"
"I saw your light was still on," he explained, staring at my nakedness, "and I've been tossing and turning for hours now. Can I come in for a while? I have to talk about Judy. She's driving me nuts!"
"No, no, not now." What did I look like, I wondered? My hair was tousled, there was nothing with which to cover myself, and I felt wet and sweaty all over. Did he see how matted my pubic hair was? I would have cared more if I hadn't been in the grip of lust. At that moment most of my body was pulsing hotly, and, unconsciously I rested one of my hands on my tits and squeezed one of them with a deep sigh. Burt's bugging eyes reminded me to stay cool for a little while longer.
"I just wanted to ask you ... well, how about if you and Judy were to get friendly, would you find out what she thinks of me then? I mean, you might invite her over to have dinner with all of us. I have to know, you understand?"
I could see the poor boy was very confused, and so I nodded and packed him off to bed. When the door closed behind me I turned off the light and rushed to join Frank. He'd kept his cock hard by masturbating slowly, and he held it up straight while I squatted over it and let myself down ever so carefully. His aim was right on target. The thick knob felt like a beefsteak must taste to a starving man. The pain of it forcing my cunt wide open was sheer bliss right then. My cunt longed for a sensation, any sensation at all, and he gave them to me. His big cock filled me from top to bottom, it kept moving up and up, bumping into arsenals of erotica inside me and touching them off into explosions of delight that had me moaning and tossing my head helplessly. Only then did I realize how much I had desired him, how deep my longing had been. And, at the same time, I saw that to be without a good length of cock would be pure misery from then on. I had talent for sex, that much was true; but I needed it also!
I hardly noticed it when Frank rolled us both over and hunched on top of me in his favorite position, that of the bull plowing the young heif-fer. Foggily I reached for his ass and parted his cheeks wide to introduce a long finger into his asshole, which had the effect of pressing the go button. His cock zipped in and out of me at great speed, his pubic bone bashed against mine, and, since he was coming in from a high angle, the base of his dick chafed against my clitoris most deliciously. I was content to he there and to be fucked into the ground. If we'd crashed through the floor at that moment it wouldn't have stopped us. How wonderful it was to be a woman and to have such a variety of pleasure zones that were so easily stimulated. I felt every part of me humming in harmony with his love-making. His hairy chest rubbed my tits the right way, his cock set my cunt on fire, and his big strong hands mauled different parts of my body in such a way as to send me teetering into an orgasm that had all the force of a cloudburst.
I was readying myself for the next one when I felt a warm spring erupt inside me and at once Frank slowed down. Now that I'd learned a few tricks I tried to apply them to get him started again. Two fingers dove into his asshole. At least he didn't roll of me right away like before. I began to fingerfuck him vigorously with one hand and digging nails of the other hand into the flesh of his ass. Franks grunted appreciatively but that was all. While I regaled his ass with all I had to give I worked my pussy up against his hard bone, moving faster and faster as the im-menence of my orgasm motivated me. "Slow down, baby," I heard him whisper but there was nothing I could do about it. The rim of his asshole around his fingers stirred me up, his pubic bone against up cunt aroused me, his body, his smell, his limp cock resting inside me, all egged me on.
"Hey, that's enough!" he protested, pulling my fingers out of his ass and getting off me. "What's the matter with you, anyway? Didn't I give you enough?"
I couldn't answer him. The fingers shot into my pussy and pulled it back so that its pink in-sides must have been glaring him in the face. At the same time I began to squeeze and pinch my tits with a regular if jerky rhythm and my breath hissed through my teeth with the effort of satisfying myself. Frank sat down on the edge of the bed and watched my contortions moodily. I couldn't help myself! In desperation I rolled over on my stomach, both my arms under me and both hands clawing at my cunt, while my ass moved up and down to fuck whatever fingers were available. Nothing had ever been as demanding as my lust at that moment! One small section of my mind remained aloof and indicated that I was making a fool of myself and that I was probably making Frank unhappy. Against that was my burning, aching cunt, suffering from a red-hot vacuum that had to be filled with anything and everything. Writhing about on the floor and rolling from side to side I manipulated my body in every way I knew until at long last a low moan issued forth from my throat and a slow, dense orgasm purged my body of its most urgent needs.
"Wow," said Frank, shaking his head in disgust, "I didn't know you were a nymphomaniac, Wanda. I'm sorry now that this ever got started. What you need is a platoon!"
I was shocked to hear him say that. Perhaps he was right, perhaps there really was something wrong with me. Hadn't I spent a good part of the day thinking about fucking my brothers? Yes, he had a point, but was it a good one. "That's not true," I said defensively, "I just enjoy it completely. And I've done without sex for nearly eighteen years so it can't be that bad!"
"These things happen all of a sudden," Frank said vaguely. He stood up and dressed in silence. I scrambled to my feet and lay down on the bed, hot and exhausted, suddenly ashamed of having revealed that part of myself to him. Would he spread the word to the other teachers? Oh, fuck it, let him! Just because he was my first lover did that necessarily mean he was the best?
He left by the window and replaced the ladder before disappearing into the darkness of night. It was past two o'clock, high time to get some sleep. But I was still too excited to relax that deeply. Instead, I reached for my diary and began to write my experience down in full. One day I'd be able to look back on my roll in the hay with Frank and laugh scornfully. That day would be a long way into the future, and I would look back as a woman of experience who had tried everything, and liked most of it. I confided everything to my diary and always kept it hidden in a special place where no one ever looked. Not that it contained much that could incriminate me in my family's eyes—not until the day before, anyway.
Half the diary was still blank. Before I went to sleep that night, I vowed to cover those virgin pages with the most lurid confessions any girl had ever made, and none of it would be fiction!