Chapter 11
A CASE OF MISTAKEN IDENTITY
"What're you going to do with the goddamn donkey?"
Leo scratched his head.
"You better decide what you will do with that donkey in the next five minutes," Conchita threatened, "or else you will be missing one hot-blooded whore who loves to fuck!"
"Shut up!"
She shook her head furiously. "I said nothing when you sold our furniture. I said nothing when you rented this over-priced barn. I said nothing when you fucked all those actresses who came up to audition for the show. I say nothing now when our bed is a mattress on a broken stage."
"That's a helluva lot of nothing," muttered Leo. "I can't hear myself think!"
"But I will say something," continued Conchita, her voice rising in anger. "I will have plenty to say if you expect me to share my bed with you and that fucking donkey!"
"First of all," Leo pointed out, "the donkey doesn't fuck. At least not people. Maybe other donkeys, but not people. And you know that as well as I do, Conchita, my Queen. We spent all night trying to get him to stuff his tool into that little girl's crack, and he just wouldn't do it. Christ! He brayed so loud I shit on the floor."
"You will sleep on the floor with your donkey," Conchita shouted. "I don't want him to sit on the bed!"
"Don't tell me!" Leo roared. "Tell the donkey!"
The donkey was sitting on the bed. Conchita was in front, pulling on the bridle. Leo was at the rear, shoving his ass.
They had been pushing and pulling for the past half-hour. So far they had had no effect on the donkey. He continued to sit on the bed.
"You push," Leo suggested, "and I'll pull."
"We already tried that," Conchita complained. "Don't you know anything about donkeys?"
"No!" Leo shouted. "Do I look like a farmer? I grew up in the city. For all I know this could be a cow!"
"Make the donkey do something!" Conchita shouted back. "Get a stick and beat it!"
"You get a stick and beat it and I'll beat you! This goddamn donkey cost me two hundred dollars and he won't even fuck like he's supposed to! I don't want to mark an inch of his skin. The son-of-a-bitch who sold him to me is gonna get this beast back in the same condition he sold him."
"Bueno! But what about tonight? We can't go to sleep in the bed if he's going to be sitting on top of it."
"I know that! That's obvious ... Conchita!" Leo screamed-a cackle of joy. The donkey had moved. Suddenly he rose up from the bed and ambled off to the far side of the stage where Leo had prepared a bucket of carrots. Dinner for the donkey.
"He's hungry! He's hungry!"
"Quick," Conchita shouted. Stripping her clothes off. "Let's get into bed before he comes back!"
"Right!" Leo yelled. "That's the first good idea you've ever had in your whole fucking life!"
"While the worst idea I ever had was shacking with you," snarled Conchita. "Fat genius! My ass! If my mother ever saw me now. In Cuba we lived in a palace. Rich off the sweat from a peasant's brow. Now, here I am, sleeping on a dirty mattress on the filthy stage of a deserted theatre just because you, you prick, want to go back to your childhood and be a clown in the circus."
"I had no sex in my childhood," Leo said. "This kind of circus is for grown-ups!"
"It might as well be for children," Conchita complained. "That donkey is only good for giving kids a ride."
Leo stepped out of his pants. "That's true," he said thoughtfully. "But I don't understand it. We tickled his cock. That fat girl licked it. Even got him to straddle the hole. Why didn't he put it in?"
"Don't ask me!" Conchita snarled. "Do you think I know why donkeys fuck!"
"You have an opinion about everything else!"
"Because I'm not dumb," Conchita shouted. "I'm not so dumb as to put two hundred dollars to buy a used animal without even testing it first."
"How could I do that?" Leo demanded. "Can you just ask a guy from the zoo if his donkey--likes to fuck girls? To hell with it, baby, I shall resolve it all in the morning. Roll over my way and give me a piece of your ass! At least I know what to do with my cock!"
"I have my period."
"So what?"
"We'll get blood all over," Conchita complained.
"Over what?" Leo asked. "This mattress? After a donkey has been sitting here with his ass for an hour you're going to complain about human blood?"
"I don't want to."
"Okay, okay, suck my cock."
"I can't."
"You can't?"
"I have gingivitis. My gums are swollen. The dentist said I shouldn't."
"You asked him?"
"Of course I asked him! He knows I live with a pervert like you!"
"Pervert, huh? Okay, up shit's creek, unless you've got piles?"
"Oh," moaned Conchita. "You can do it that way. But gently, you pig, and use some cream!"
"Only the best," Leo muttered. He coughed up a glob of phlegm from his throat and spit it out onto his fingertips. Reaching for her ass he inserted his soggy fingers into the tautened anal cavity. Conchita squirmed. "Hold still!"
"Bitten in the ass by a rattlesnake and he expects me to hold still!"
Slipping one arm under her waist Leo hefted her body into position. He was poised directly behind her. Using his other hand he felt his way between her thighs until he found the fold of skin that harbored her clitoris. He rotated his finger rapidly. Conchita was Cuban. The response was immediate. She began to breathe rapidly. Rocking back and forth on her knees.
Leo wedged his cock between the cheeks of her ass.
Conchita leaned back. Slowly. Leo held himself firmly in place. Conchita rocked back. Using her own hands to hold her cheeks apart. Gradually, gradually ... Leo's cock was impaled. His body fell limp. He grunted. Moaning with passion as the fierce intensity of her rectal muscles opened-and-closed like a spasmodic fist encasing his penis in a well of delight.
"CLUMP! CLUMP."
"What's that?" Conchita whispered. Halting her motion in fright. "That's the donkey!"
"I know it's the donkey!" Leo screamed. "He finished eating and he's taking a walk. Who cares about that fucking donkey? Just move your ass, you bitch, move your ass!"
"But, Leo, what if the donkey comes back to bed? What if he sees your ass in the air? What if he thinks your ass is a cunt? What if he has a hard-on? What if he..."