Chapter 1
South Akard Street was teeming with traffic as Janice guided her new MG through the five o'clock rush. Jeez, she thought, where the hell does everyone come from? Dallas didn't have that big a population, and yet it seemed like New York City. Almost as much smog, too; she coughed as a city bus discharged a cloud of fumes over her. This was the only time she was sorry she had bought the MG. No top, and she sat twelve inches off the ground, target for everything from exhaust fumes to horny young men at street corners. Janice smiled as she remembered the one that morning, on the corner of Mockingbird Lane. He had been kinda cute, with tight blue jeans, a sport shirt open to his navel, showing a smooth muscular chest. As she pulled up, waiting for the light to change, he had moved his hips suggestively, showing his ample crotch, and grinned at her. "How 'bout a ride?" he said, and she knew from his accent he was definitely west of Fort Worth. She smiled at him, but fortunately the light changed at that moment, and with a scream of tires, she had barreled down the street, leaving him standing there, staring after her, pursing his lips.
He had been cute, she had to admit. And that bulge in his jeans had given her a twitch between her legs. Yes, he was obviously well-hung but then what Texas cowboy wasn't? Or maybe it was the way their jeans folded in front that made them look that way. She had never really found out. Even with Glenn, she had yet to find out. She giggled to herself as she realized: eighteen years old, and still a virgin. She was probably the only girl at school who was, judging from the way the others talked. But maybe it was just talk. Janice didn't really care, but there were times, when she saw a young man with a particularly large bulge in front, that her thoughts strayed to sex. How was it? she wondered, what was it like to feel a man's penis sliding into that deep cavern between her legs, bringing her to a height of ecstasy? Was it better than when she stuck her own finger in like she did at night sometimes, alone in bed, fantasizing in her mind over someone? Janice knew it had to be. A penis was thicker than her finger. Sarah Sue Kilkenny was always talking about the guys she shacked up with, and how thick their cocks were. "It takes a thick one to really make me come," Sarah Sue had said, and Janice had blushed, but secretly she yearned to be able to say the same thing. But Sarah Sue was from Pecos, and confessed to having been raped at the age of eleven by one of her father's ranch hands, a lanky youth by the name of Slim, who was run out of town when Old Man Kilkenny found out. The Kilkenny family ran Pecos, and had for years. Money talks, and the Kilkenny millions were legendary.
Also legendary was the availability of the Kilkenny girls, who might have been called trashy whores if their father hadn't owned the town; instead they were sheltered behind the respectable facade which money provided. Yes, the Kilkenny home was something else, too. Janice remembered the first time she had visited there, when she was only fifteen. She had been suitably impressed when the old man displayed his five original paintings by Renoir, Manet and Utrillo.
"Got them in Paris last year," the ruddy-faced oilman had boomed out. "Paris, France, of course. Real bargain for two million."
And Janice had felt slightly put-down because she knew her own father was only worth one million; but then she was able to feel superior to the Kilkenny girls because everyone knew they screwed like rattlesnakes, and Janice was still a virgin.
Yes, and she'd remain that way until she and Glenn were married; as much as she loved him, she would never give in to him. She grinned, remembering his words over the phone: "Meet me outside Neiman's at five-thirty. We can have dinner in town and take in the show at the Majestic."
That was for the benefit of anyone who might have been listening in on the house phone; in truth, they were going out to White Rock Lake to, set in the car and neck. Janice felt a warm glow as she remembered the last time, when Glenn had aroused her to such a peak of excitement that she almost let him do it, but at the last minute, she pulled away. She wouldn't, she wouldn't, she reminded herself, not until they were married.
She hadn't even felt his penis, although she had allowed him to undo her bra and kiss and fondle her breasts, while his hand slid up between her legs, gently touching her thighs and coming at last to her warm, moist little mound. Oh, she had wanted to; she knew she wanted to, but she couldn't. She just couldn't. Every time she thought of it, she heard her mother's voice: "Those Kilkenny girls. Whores, every one of them. Cheap West Texas trash. Just because their old man struck it rich doesn't mean a goddamn thing. Money don't make a lady out of a tramp." And her mother's beady little eyes would fasten on Janice, somewhat affectionately, somewhat accusingly. "My girl's as pure as the day she was born, ain't you, Janice?" And Janice would cringe, wondering how her mother could possibly have graduated from S.M.U. and still talk like an East Texas oil rigger. But then, her mother hadn't been much before she married, and like most Texas girls, she married money. "It's just as easy to love a rich man," was the philosophy her mother had drummed into her for years. So it was fortunate that Glenn came from a rich family; Janice knew the marriage wouldn't stand a chance otherwise.
But it was also fortunate that she really loved Glenn. It wasn't just a passing crush. They had known each other since junior high, and had done just about everything together except have sex. And the way she felt, she hoped the marriage would be soon; she wasn't too sure how much longer she could hold out against the sometimes overpowering feeling in her loins. But then, that wasn't anything but the result of her feelings for Glenn; it was love, she knew, true love, and he loved her in return.
She whipped the car around the corner of Elm and sped down towards St. Paul where she knew he would be waiting outside Neiman-Marcus. Glenn had gone to work for the famous store even before he graduated from school; his skill as an artist had got him a permanent position designing their newspaper ads as well as their window displays. Of course, Janice knew her father did not altogether approve of Glenn's promising career.
"He should get into business," the old man growled. "Drawin' ain't a man's work. 'Sides, he's liable to get contaminated with all those fairies. Makes me wanna puke every time I go in that goddamn place."
Janice knew her father, like most Texans, was conscious of the masculine image expected of the male residents of the Lone Star State. The idea of a man doing anything less than working in some form of physical labor often gave rise to doubts about his sexual proclivities. But she knew from her own experience that Glenn had no problems with his identity. He was a man, eager for a woman, and she was his woman, if not in body yet, at least in mind.
Janice jammed her foot on the brakes as a motorcycle pulled out of an alley and across the line of traffic. She caught her breath and cussed the long-haired, leather-jacketed young man who sped away in front of her, weaving between the cars with little regard for safety. Yet he had been rather attractive, she noted; his hair was just like Glenn's, and his square jaw and piercing eyes... yes, he was appealing. She pictured herself for a moment, riding behind him on the motorcycle, her arms around his chest, her body pressed close to his, feeling the roughness of the leather jacket and the tenseness of his muscles underneath.
Janice shook the image from her mind and focussed her eyes on the sidewalk. Among the crowd she saw the tall figure, standing, one arm up waving at her. She smiled instinctively, as she always did at his handsome face, his clean-cut features and dark brown hair.
"Hi. I thought you'd got lost."
He jumped into the car, bent over quickly to kiss her and then leaned back as she rejoined the traffic flowing out toward the expressway.
"The traffic's bad today."
"It always is." He settled back and lit a cigarette. "You okay? No problems at home?"
She nodded.
"Nope. They think we're taking in a show again. Mother said for me to be home no later than one."
Glenn blew out his cheeks and shook his head. "Jeez, you'd think you were still a kid the way they carry on." He stared at her pixylike face, framed in waves of long blonde hair. "You might look it, but by damn, you're a woman." His eyes strayed down to her bosom, noting with satisfaction the fully rounded curves beneath her blouse, and he remembered how his lips caressed those creamy-rich orbs and how she had groaned and twisted in his arms with delight.
Glenn had often told his friends about Janice; how this girl with the voluptuous figure and the face of a child had crept into his heart and captured him. Despite his occasional nights with other girls, he knew it was Janice he wanted to marry; it was Janice who would be the mother of his children.
"Where d'you wanna eat?"
She shrugged. "Anywhere." She pressed her foot on the gas pedal and they zoomed on to the Central Expressway, pulling away from the inside lane and speeding north. "No, why not let's go eat at the Lakeside? It's good food and it's quiet. I feel like someplace quiet to eat."
"I'd like to eat you someplace quiet," Glenn said, bending over and kissing her arm.
"Glenn Harrington, you stop that kind of talk while I'm driving," she said in mock horror. "I ain't that kinda girl." Her voice assumed an exaggerated West Texas drawl.
They both laughed, and she took her eyes off the road for a second to look at him, and there was a warmth between them which made Glenn sigh and reach over to squeeze her leg.
"I love you," he said. "Goddammit, when're we getting married?"
She shrugged again. "You know what we agreed."
"So what? I'm making good money now."
"That's got nothing to do with it. Daddy said not until you were twenty-one. That's only a few months away. We can wait."
He adjusted his crotch carefully. "It's easy for you to say that. You don't know how hard it is for me."
She giggled.
"I know how hard it can get with you," she said wickedly, remembering the enormous bulge in his pants that night when she almost relented and let him do it.
"You don't," he replied in mock anger. "You wouldn't even touch it."
"All in good time," she replied, realizing that she sounded just like her mother.
The wind whipped her hair around her head, and Glenn threw his cigarette away, brushing his own hair back into place with an impatient sweep of his hand.
They turned off the expressway and sped down Mockingbird Lane, heading east toward White Rock Lane. They were silent, and Janice smiled to herself, anticipating the evening ahead, lying in his arms in their own secluded spot among the trees overlooking the still waters, while the moon above cast a romantic glow over them. Even though she was hungry and looking forward to dinner, she was anxious to get it over with and get away alone with Glenn, to feel his strong arms around her once more and his mouth pressed to her own, exciting her beyond measure.
She knew perfectly well that if it weren't for her mother's constant harping on the values of virginity she might have given in long before, not just to Glenn, but to one or two others she had dated. But even though she had felt herself almost being pushed over the edge many times when she and Glenn had been alone together, there was always that little voice deep inside that told her to hold back. She remembered how her mother had once said to her, "Anything you do with a man is fine once you're married. But only whores take up with a man, and I don't want my child to be a whore." It had always been impressed upon her that sex was sinful outside of marriage; yet why, then, she often argued to herself, did so many other girls do it and still look the same? Like the Kilkenny girls. They were all popular and beautiful, and seemed to suffer no ill effects from their promiscuous behavior. And from what Sarah Sue had said many times, it was the most wonderful thing in the world to have a boy on top, his penis digging deep and his mouth covering your own...
Janice shifted in her seat, conscious of a growing discomfort in her body that was the result of her thinking, especially with Glenn beside her now, and an evening of necking in store. Impatiently she pressed her foot on the gas and the little car roared down the final stretch toward the restaurant beside the lake. Glenn glanced at her, frowning slightly, but said nothing.
With a scream of tires, she braked, pulled off the road, and stopped the car beside the red and white brick building. With a nervous laugh, she jumped out and grinned at Glenn.
"You're turning into a hot-rod since you bought this car," he chastised her humorously, putting his arms around her slim waist and falling into step as they walked toward the door.
"Sorry," she murmured. "I didn't mean to scare you."
"You didn't scare me," he replied, "but just take it easy. Those little cars aren't the safest things in the world."
"Oh, hush."
They walked into the dimly lit interior and found a table over by the far wall. A waiter came over and smiled at them.
"Would you like a drink first?" he asked, and Janice shook her head.
"No, dinner," she said gaily. "I'm starving."
They ordered spare ribs and settled back, staring at each other across the clean white tablecloth. Glenn put out his hands and took hers.
"I love you," he murmured, "and tonight I want us to do something special."
She frowned. "Something special?"
He nodded, grinning. "Yes. And I think you want to as much as I do."
Janice felt a cold chill run down her back, and at the same time a warm glow in her loins. Carefully she pulled her hands out of his and stared at him sadly.
"Glenn, I want to. You know that. But we've waited this long. We can wait a while longer. For my sake, please."
"For your stupid-ass parents' sake, you mean," he snapped bitterly. "If that mother of your hadn't put all those weird ideas in your head, we wouldn't have this problem."
"Oh, so it's a problem now."
They glared at each other, and Glenn reached for her hand again and smiled.
"I'm sorry. But I know you want to, Janice. I've brought a rubber with me tonight. You won't get pregnant. I promise. Honey, it's natural for people to do it when they feel the way we do. And we're getting married soon."
"Okay, okay, if we're getting married, we'll wait," she said firmly. "And it's not because of getting pregnant, and you know it. Don't you think you'll feel better if you know your bride is a virgin?"
He scowled. "I really don't care," he said honestly. "I love you, whether you've shacked up with a million guys or not. You don't love someone because they're a virgin. You love them because..." He paused. "Well, just because, that's why." He squeezed her hand. "You don't love me any less because I've been with other girls."
She nodded. "I know I don't. But it's different with a man."
"It's no different," Glenn said evenly. "It's not the sex that makes me love you. It's everything about you. Everything except this goddamn priggish attitude. I sure hope you're not going to hold out after we're married."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, like let's do it Mondays and Fridays or something like that."
She smiled. "You know me better than that."
"Okay, I suppose so. But it's sure a problem."
The waiter brought their food and the conversation ended, but Janice bit her lip, staring at him and wondering. Why was sex such a big thing? Maybe she should give in. No, you've waited this long, she reasoned with herself, you can wait a while longer.
With a sigh she lifted the spareribs and bit into the first piece, relishing its spicy flavor and tenderness.
"Good, huh?"
"Yeah. They always serve good meat here."
By the time they had finished the meal, they both felt more relaxed. Glenn sat back and lit a cigarette, inhaling slowly, and staring at Janice in the dim light.
"That was good."
"Uh-huh. You going to have some pie?"
"I don't think so. I'm full."
"Me, too." She grinned at him. "I just want to relax and..." Her voice trailed away, and she giggled. Glenn pursed his lips and nodded his head.
"I know what you want to do."
The smile fell away from Janice's face.
"Oh, Glenn, stop it."
He leaned forward seriously. "No, I mean it. You want it just as much as I do. You want me to hold you close, for us to be together without any clothes on, and feel-"
"Stop!"
Janice's face went white, and she raised her hand to her mouth, looking around, embarrassed that her voice had carried clear across the room, but no one turned to stare.
Glenn relaxed. "All right, I'll can it. Come on, let's go. We can talk better alone."
In silence they left the table. Janice walked outside and waited for Glenn to pay the bill, and join her beside the car. Without a word, she got in the passenger side and sat, biting her lip nervously.
Glenn got behind the wheel.
"I need the keys."
She handed them over, and a moment later the MG roared into life and took off along the road leading around the lake. Janice stared at the darkening skyline, silhouetted like black fingers studded with electric diamonds. Dallas really was a pretty city at night, she thought inconsequentially. Yes, think of anything but the one thing that's uppermost in your mind, just as it was in his. Sex. Yes, sex, sex, sex. Why does it always have to come down to that?
The car settled down and she sighed as she felt the warm breeze against her cheek. She felt Glenn's hand on her knee, and she moved closer.
"I love you," he murmured.
"I know."
"I'm sorry if I upset you."
"That's all right. Forget it."
"It's just that..."
"I said forget it."
"Okay."
Slowly they circled the lake until they got to the south side where a large clump of trees provided the privacy they needed. Glenn swung off the road and bumped over the uneven ground until they came to a halt between some bushes, completely screened from prying eyes. He switched off the engine, killed the lights, and turned to Janice. Without a word, they embraced, and she felt his lips, warm and demanding, upon her own. She relaxed against him, and felt his chest firm against her breasts, rubbing the nipples into pointed excitement. His one hand caressed her ears as his mouth forced hers open, and their tongues blended and she felt herself respond. Within her, she felt her desire mounting, and in her mind she pictured his penis stretching out from its normal size until it became firm, hard and throbbing against his pants, demanding what she was unwilling to give. They broke apart, and he stared at her face in the dimness. With a finger, he traced the outline of her brows and her nose.
"You're lovely," he murmured. "You're the loveliest girl I've ever known."
She smiled, pleased by his compliment. She felt his hand slip down from her shoulder to her neck and down towards her breast.
"Not yet," she said softly, and with an impatient sigh, he pulled back.
"Why not?" he demanded. "Damnit, we're alone, and we love each other."
"Glenn, I..." Her voice faltered, and she felt herself close to tears.
His hand slid down again and closed around her breast.
"Shut up and enjoy it," he said roughly, closing his mouth over hers and pushing his tongue against her own. Automatically she responded, feeling his fingers kneading her flesh and moving inside her dress, under her bra.
"Take it off," he muttered, breaking away.
"Glenn..."
"I said take it off, damnit," he said roughly, and without another word she reached under her blouse, undid her bra and let it slip down, together with her outer garment. She was bare to the waist, her pale skin glowing in the moonlight. She heard Glenn suck in his breath, and then his mouth came down, closing around her nipple. She twisted, feeling her loins quiver with anticipation.
"Oh, Glenn..." Her voice sounded a million miles away, and her hands went around his neck, fondling his hair as he sucked on her breast. She felt his tongue flick across the end, pushing her passions even higher. He seemed to have opened his mouth very wide, to take in the entire nipple and much of the surrounding smooth flesh as well. She thought for a moment that her entire orb was enclosed within his mouth; the sensations were greater than the time before, and she found her body quivering with excitement. Her vagina was awash with liquid love-juices that flowed down her canal, lubricating her in readiness... yes, in readiness for his penis which would be sliding into her, pushing right deep down, past her clitoris, down to the mouth of her womb, and she would enclose his sex completely, fulfilling them both. Oh, Glenn, Glenn, I want you, I want you so very much. I want you to fuck me good, fuck me, fuck me...
Janice opened her eyes, startled that she would even think that word, but then Sarah Sue was always using it, she remembered, and it sounded so common, but so wickedly thrilling. She wished she could say it the same way, and with the same truth.
She pulled his mouth off hers and lay back, panting. He started at her, and his fingers caressed her, rubbing the nipples.
"Wait, wait..." she whispered urgently.
"What's the matter?" Glenn asked, his voice gentle.
"Nothing. I'm sorry."
His head came down again, and she felt her insides convulse once more from the ecstasy that flooded her body.
His hand slid down her body and onto her thigh. She felt his fingers creep up her flesh, along the inside of her leg, until the pressure against her mound told her he had reached his goal. Carefully his fingers lifted the edge of her panties and pushed in between her hairs, into her, touching her clitoris. She gasped, conscious of the electric shock that flashed through her. She began moaning, knowing that if he kept that up she would have an orgasm, and she wanted it. Oh, God, how she wanted it.
"Glenn, please..." she muttered, but his only answer was a wicked bite on her nipple which added to the growing eroticism within her. His fingers were inside her, sliding around her warm, wet cavern, his thumb and forefinger touching her clitoris, pinching it and rubbing it up and down. Oh, how wonderfully he did that, much better than she ever did it herself. Harder, harder, she found herself thinking; pinch me harder there, send me over the edge and let me float... float in that wonderful world where there is nothing but pure sensation and ecstasy.
She felt him pull her body toward him, and she let herself go, knowing that there was no turning back now. They would lie together in the car, until their passionate mood was spent, and she wished it could be in a large double bed instead, with both of them naked, and Glenn's penis, hard and firm, within her vagina, fucking, fucking...
She felt him take her hand, and a moment later place it around his shaft, which was throbbing and firm and projecting from his pants. Her eyes opened in alarm, and she jerked her hand away.
"Glenn, I said-" she began furiously, but he cut her off with an impatient burst of words.
"Shut up and play with it," he said. "It won't kill you to do that, goddamnit!"
He grabbed her hand again and placed it around the shaft, and she felt her fingers enclose the thick, broad head as she involuntarily closed her fist and slid it down the length. He sighed.
"See, that doesn't hurt a bit, does it?" he said softly.
Janice pulled her hand away again and moved across the seat. Her body had begun to shake uncontrollably, and the tears which had welled up earlier now burst forth without reserve. She leaned against the door and sobbed quietly.
Glenn sat up, staring at her.
"For chris'sake," he complained, and out of the corner of her eye she saw him place his own hand upon his erect organ and begin massaging it up and down slowly.
"Stop it, stop it," she cried, fumbling for the door handle, jerking it, and scrambling out of the car. She tripped and fell headlong on the grass. Glenn followed her, and she felt his arms around her, lifting her up, and his mouth descended upon her own. He pulled her body to his, and she felt his penis, hard and firm between her legs, pushing up, ever up toward her crevice. She struggled, and the more she tried to pull away the harder he held her against him; the sensual excitement in her limbs exceeded anything she had ever experienced, and much as she tried to pull away, something in her responded; she knew deep inside she wanted it to happen. She was conscious of his mouth hungrily devouring her lips while his arms held her body firmly against his own, and his sex was pushing, probing, insisting on the ultimate.
With a final effort, she pushed against him, tripped again, and fell over backward on the rough ground.
"Stay away from me," she screamed, staring up at him.
He stood before her, breathing heavily, and slowly his hand descended to his penis and he began masturbating himself as he gazed down at her half-naked body. Fascinated, she stared at the long, thick shaft in his hand, its outlines clear in the moonlight, every fold of skin revealed as it slid back and forth over the dark red head, which was glistening. Whimpering, she lay there while his hand movements became quicker and quicker, until, with a groan, he ejaculated.
She gasped as she watched the spurting of his semen on the ground before her.
"You... you pervert!"
She scrambled to her feet, pulled her bra and blouse up and climbed back into the car, sitting there trembling.
A few moments later, Glenn got in beside her. He was breathing heavily. Finally he spoke, softly and intensely.
"I'm not going to apologize," he said. "You don't know how it is to want someone as much as I want you, Janice." His hand reached over to touch her, but she cringed and moved away. "It's only because I love you so much."
Her eyes flashed.
"If you loved me, you wouldn't even think of things like that," she snapped. "You'd control yourself like any decent man."
His anger boiled over.
"You little cock-teaser," he snapped. "If you felt the same way as I do, we'd have been fucking months ago. You want to. I know you do. But you're all hung-up on those old-fashioned ideas. Let me tell you, Janice, until you snap out of it, we'd better not see each other for a while. I can't take it. I honestly can't. Either we get married right away, or..." His voice trailed off.
With an impatient shake of his head, he started the car and backed out onto the highway. Janice remained silent, and even as he got out in front of his house, she found herself unable to look at him or even speak. Without a word, she slipped over behind the wheel and drove on home, her mind teeming with a million conflicting thoughts.
As she crawled into bed, she could still feel the hardness of his penis within her fingers, and the image of his shaft was foremost in her mind as her fingers strayed down between her legs.